音乐— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more natural and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence (I prefer happy music), then give one or two specific reasons with a linking word. Correct grammar (e.g. 'it makes me feel relaxed and encouraged', 'in several situations', 'when I ride my bike'). Keep to a maximum of 3–4 short sentences.

範例: I prefer happy music. It makes me feel relaxed and encouraged, especially when I ride my bike. For example, upbeat songs help me keep a steady pace and lift my mood.

建議: Be specific and correct grammar. Give one clear main point, then a supporting detail with a linking word. Avoid vague or repeated adjectives (e.g. 'more happier' is wrong). Use precise phrases: 'it makes me feel happier and more energetic' and describe effect ('I can exercise longer'). Limit to 2–3 sentences.

範例: Yes, happy music makes me feel happier and more energetic. For example, when I go running or swimming, upbeat songs motivate me and help me exercise for longer.

× Actually I listen to both sad and happy music in several situation, but if you let me choose one, I will choose the happy music because it make me feel easy and encouraging.

✓ Actually, I listen to both sad and happy music in several situations, but if you let me choose one, I will choose happy music because it makes me feel relaxed and encouraged.

Errors: 'several situation' uses incorrect quantifier/plural — should be 'several situations'. 'the happy music' unnecessarily uses the definite article; say 'happy music' for general reference (article error but handled as quantifier/generalization). 'it make' is subject-verb agreement (third person singular) and was corrected to 'it makes' (this is related to subject-verb agreement but fixed here to maintain grammatical correctness). Word choice: 'easy and encouraging' is unnatural; 'relaxed and encouraged' conveys intended meaning. Suggestions: use plural with 'several', avoid 'the' for general nouns, ensure verb agrees with singular subject (it -> makes), and choose more natural adjective pairs.

× When I'm riding a bike I will listen it.

✓ When I'm riding a bike I listen to it.

Errors: 'I will listen it' incorrectly uses 'listen' with an object without the preposition 'to' and uses future tense awkwardly. Use present continuous or simple present to describe habitual actions: 'I listen to it' or 'I listen to music' and include the preposition 'to' after 'listen'. Also 'listen it' is incorrect; 'listen to it' is required. Suggestion: use 'I listen to it' for habitual actions or 'I listen to music' for clarity.

× Sure, the happy music usually make me feel more happier, more easier and more exciting, more encouraging, especially when I am sporting like a swimming, running and it can make me longer.

✓ Sure, happy music usually makes me feel happier, more relaxed and more excited and encouraged, especially when I am doing sports like swimming and running, and it can make me last longer.

Multiple errors: 'the happy music' should be 'happy music' for generalization. 'make' should be 'makes' for third person singular (subject-verb agreement). 'more happier' and 'more exciting' are incorrect comparative forms: 'happier' and 'more excited' suffice; do not combine 'more' with '-er' endings. 'more easier' is incorrect; use 'easier' or 'more relaxed' depending on intended meaning. 'especially when I am sporting like a swimming, running' is incorrect: 'sporting' is not used this way; use 'doing sports like swimming and running' or 'when I swim or run'. 'it can make me longer' is unclear — likely meant 'it can help me last longer' or 'it can make me keep going longer'; I used 'make me last longer'. Suggestions: avoid double comparatives (more + -er), match verb forms with subjects, use correct activity phrasing ('doing sports', 'swimming and running'), and choose clear verbs for duration ('last longer', 'keep going longer').