教师— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more grammatically accurate, concise and coherent. Start with a clear topic sentence, use past tense consistently when describing a past teacher, avoid repetition and unnecessary phrases, and limit to at most 4–5 sentences. Use linking words to show cause and effect (for example, because/so) and provide one specific example of what she did to make lessons interesting.

範例: My favourite teacher was my high school history teacher. She was very creative and used role-plays and stories to explain historical events, so I found the subject fascinating. Because of her engaging methods, I became more interested in history than in science. Her classes made me enjoy learning and remember facts more easily.

建議: Give a direct, confident topic sentence and avoid filler words. Use correct vocabulary (e.g., 'sense of patience' or 'a lot of patience'), correct tense and clearer example details: when, whom you helped, and what you taught. Use linking words such as 'for example' and 'so' but keep sentences concise.

範例: Yes, I would like to be a teacher in the future because I have a lot of patience and enjoy helping others learn. For example, when I was a teenager I tutored younger children in math and English, which improved my communication and teaching skills. As a result, I felt rewarded and more confident about becoming a teacher.

建議: Use past tense and correct sentence structure. Begin with a clear topic sentence naming the teacher, then give two specific supporting details (her traits and concrete actions). Remove hesitations and finish sentences fully. Use linking words like 'when' and 'because' to connect ideas.

範例: Yes, I still remember my 10th-grade history teacher, Mrs. Ritu. She was very patient and always took time to explain difficult topics clearly. For instance, when I could not understand an event, she would use timelines and maps to help me, which made it much easier to remember the facts.

建議: Answer directly and concisely. Say who you contact and how, avoid vague phrases like 'whenever there is, literally'. Give a clear routine or frequency, and use linking words to explain purpose (so that). Keep it to 2–3 sentences.

範例: Yes, I am still in touch with some of my primary school teachers through Facebook. I usually message them on their birthdays to thank them, so they know I still appreciate their support.

建議: Start with a clear topic sentence describing the help received. Use correct tense and give a specific method she used and a clear result. Use linking words such as 'because' and 'as a result'. Keep to 3–4 sentences.

範例: She helped me by teaching concepts in different ways, such as using stories, diagrams and class activities. Because of these methods I began to understand the subject more deeply and enjoyed studying it. As a result, I improved my grades and became one of the top students in the class.

建議: Provide a clear comparative topic sentence. If saying they are equally liked, state that explicitly and give 1–2 specific reasons with linking words. Fix grammar (plural/singular agreement) and avoid run-on sentences. Keep concise.

範例: I don't prefer one over the other; I like both my primary and high school teachers equally. They both helped me with difficult questions and offered emotional support when I felt discouraged, which motivated me to keep trying.

× She was quite creative person.

✓ She was quite a creative person.

Missing indefinite article 'a' before a singular countable noun 'creative person'. Add 'a' to make it grammatically correct: 'a creative person'.

× She makes history such an interesting subject at that time that instead of learning science, I Start learning history.

✓ She made history such an interesting subject at that time that instead of learning science, I started learning history.

The sentence refers to a past period ('at that time'), so verbs must be in past tense. 'Makes' should be 'made' (third person past), and 'Start' should be 'started'. Also capitalize properly. Ensure consistent past tense throughout the sentence.

× Yes, I would definitely become a good teacher because I think I have that rate of patience in myself.

✓ Yes, I would definitely become a good teacher because I think I have that rare amount of patience in myself.

The phrase 'that rate of patience' is incorrect collocation. Use 'rare' and 'amount' or better 'a great deal of patience' to express the idea. Also 'would definitely become' is acceptable for a hypothetical future, but clarify phrase to be natural: 'I would definitely become a good teacher' is fine.

× Uh, for example, when I was intent, I also teach some, uh, children, uh, to help them in their studies.

✓ Uh, for example, when I was in college, I also taught some children to help them in their studies.

'was intent' is incorrect here; likely intended 'was in college' or 'was a student'. The main verb refers to past action, so 'teach' must be past tense 'taught'. Ensure verb tense consistency (past) and remove filler words for clarity.

× Yes, when I was in my 10th grade, my history teacher Mrs. Ritu is very nice and kind teacher.

✓ Yes, when I was in my 10th grade, my history teacher Mrs. Ritu was a very nice and kind teacher.

Mixed tenses: referring to past, so 'is' should be 'was'. Missing indefinite article 'a' before 'very nice and kind teacher'. Use past tense for consistency.

× She has full of patience in herself whenever I didn't get anything she umm understands my feeling and always helped me to solve the questions I.

✓ She was full of patience; whenever I didn't understand something, she understood my feelings and always helped me to solve the questions.

Several issues: 'has full of patience in herself' is wrong collocation—use 'was full of patience' or 'had a lot of patience'. 'didn't get anything' is informal/unclear; use 'didn't understand something'. 'she umm understands' mixes tenses; change to past 'she understood'. Sentence end 'questions I' is incomplete—reorder to 'helped me to solve the questions'. Ensure consistent past tense and clearer expressions.

× Yes, this is the era of modern technology. We are connected via Facebook and whenever there is, literally, I remember to wish her on time so that she can also feel grateful that I am her student.

✓ Yes, this is the era of modern technology. We are connected through Facebook and whenever it's her birthday I remember to wish her on time so that she can feel glad that I am her student.

'via Facebook' is acceptable but 'through Facebook' is more natural here. The fragment 'whenever there is, literally' is unclear; likely intended 'whenever it's her birthday' or 'whenever I remember'. 'feel grateful that I am her student' is odd—teachers feel proud or happy; 'feel glad/proud' is more natural. Adjust for clarity and natural collocation.

× Actually I was very weak in history and then she teach me the concept in different ways.

✓ Actually I was very weak in history and then she taught me the concepts in different ways.

Past-tense narration requires 'taught' instead of 'teach'. 'the concept' should be plural 'the concepts' or 'concepts' if referring to multiple ideas. Maintain past tense consistency.

× I find it very interesting and become one of the best student in class just because of her guidance.

✓ I found it very interesting and became one of the best students in the class just because of her guidance.

The context is past, so use past tense: 'found' and 'became'. Also pluralize 'student' to 'students' and include article 'the class'. Ensure tense consistency and correct noun number.

× No, I think my primary as well as secondary school teacher, both are very kind to me.

✓ No, I think my primary as well as secondary school teachers are both very kind to me.

Subject is plural ('teachers'), so 'teacher' should be plural. Remove unnecessary comma and ensure subject-verb agreement: 'teachers are'.

× They always help me to solve difficult questions and they also give me emotional support whenever I feel that I was not able to do that thing but just because of their appreciation.

✓ They always help me solve difficult questions and they also give me emotional support whenever I feel that I am not able to do something; their appreciation encourages me.

Mixed tenses: 'feel that I was not able' should be present 'feel that I am not able' to match habitual present. 'help me to solve' can be simplified to 'help me solve'. 'do that thing' is vague—use 'do something'. The final clause is awkward; rephrase to 'their appreciation encourages me' for clarity and natural expression.