教师— Part 1 評分報告

建議: 文法と表現を自然にするために、主語と関係詞の使い方を整理し、冗長な部分を省きましょう。例えば“who he can teach”は誤りで、“who teaches”や“who can teach”のどちらかに直すべきです。また理由を一文で述べた後、具体例を一つ付け加えると内容が豊かになります。

範例: Yes. My favorite teacher is my math teacher because he explains difficult concepts clearly. For example, he uses real-life problems to make abstract ideas easier to understand, which helped me improve my grades.

建議: 時制と語順のミスが多いので、過去と現在をはっきり区別して話しましょう。口語表現（wanna）は避け、正式な表現を使うこと。理由を簡潔に述べ、過去の興味については過去形で説明すると流れがよくなります。

範例: No, I don't want to be a teacher. However, when I was in junior high school I was interested in becoming one because I enjoyed helping my classmates with their homework.

建議: 繰り返しや中断を避け、文を滑らかにつなげましょう。現在形・過去形の使い分けに注意し、授業のどんな点が楽しかったか具体例を加えると説得力が増します。

範例: Yes. I remember my elementary school music teacher. She made lessons fun by letting us play simple instruments and sing together, which made me love music.

建議: 理由を述べる際にもっと自然な語順と語句を使いましょう。'teachers account' は不自然なので 'their contact details' や 'phone numbers' を使うとよいです。また短く明確に述べ、必要なら将来の可能性について一文加えると良いです。

範例: No, I'm not. I don't have their contact details or phone numbers, so I can't keep in touch. I would like to reconnect one day if I can find them online.

建議: 文法（過去形・三人称単数）と語彙を正しく使い、意味を明確にしましょう。'absented' は不自然で 'was absent'、'print' も単語選択を 'handouts' や 'printed materials' に変えると良いです。具体的にどのような資料が役立ったかを一例で示してください。

範例: When I was absent from school, my teacher gave me printed handouts and notes so I could catch up. These summaries helped me understand the lessons I missed.

× He is my mathematic teacher who he can teach mathematics very well, so I respect him.

✓ He is my math teacher who can teach mathematics very well, so I respect him.

The sentence contains an unnecessary pronoun 'he' after the relative pronoun 'who'. In English, when using a relative clause with 'who', you should not repeat the subject. Also 'mathematic' is incorrect; use 'math' or 'mathematics'. Suggestion: remove the extra 'he' and use the correct noun form.

× No, I don't. I don't wanna be a teacher, but when I was junior high school student I'm in, I was interested in become a teacher.

✓ No, I don't. I didn't want to be a teacher, but when I was in junior high school I was interested in becoming a teacher.

Multiple errors: verb tense and form and word order. 'I'm in' is incorrect placement; the correct order is 'when I was in junior high school'. 'Was interested in become' is wrong because after 'interested in' we need a gerund: 'becoming'. Also 'don't wanna' is informal; match past/future context—use 'didn't want' to refer to a past change in attitude. Suggestion: use correct word order and gerund after 'interested in', and choose appropriate tense.

× Yes I do. She is my elementary school teacher. She teaches us music and the class is very The class was very fun for me.

✓ Yes, I do. She was my elementary school teacher. She taught us music and the class was very fun for me.

Tense inconsistency and repetition: if referring to a past teacher, use past tense 'was' and 'taught'. The original repeats 'The class' and mixes present and past. Remove duplication and keep consistent past tense. Also 'very fun for me' is acceptable, though 'very enjoyable' is more natural. Suggestion: keep past tense and avoid repeating the phrase.

× No I am not because I don't know teachers account or phone number so I can't keep in touch with them.

✓ No, I'm not, because I don't know the teachers' accounts or phone numbers, so I can't keep in touch with them.

Missing articles and plural possessive form: 'teachers account' should be 'teachers' accounts' (possessive plural) and 'phone number' should be plural 'phone numbers' when referring to multiple teachers. Also add commas for clarity. Suggestion: use the possessive apostrophe for plural nouns and pluralize 'phone numbers'.

× When I absented school all day, teachers give me some print to help my study that very kind of way.

✓ When I was absent from school for a whole day, the teachers gave me some handouts to help me study; that was very kind of them.

Multiple problems: 'absented' is incorrect; use 'was absent'. 'Absent school' needs preposition 'from'. 'All day' is better as 'for a whole day'. Subject-verb agreement and tense: past context requires 'gave' not 'give'. 'Some print' is unnatural; use 'handouts' or 'printed materials'. 'Help my study' should be 'help me study'. 'That very kind of way' is ungrammatical; use 'that was very kind of them.' Suggestion: use correct verb forms, prepositions, pluralization, and natural collocations.