整洁— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more fluent and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid fillers like "umm", and give one specific reason and a brief example. Use a linking phrase for clarity.

範例: Yes, I like to keep things tidy because clutter distracts me. For example, when my desk is organized I can find documents quickly, so I work more efficiently.

建議: Use past tense consistently and expand slightly with a reason or contrast. Avoid repetition and correct grammar ("used to" and "relied").

範例: No, I didn't used to keep my room tidy when I was a child; I relied on my mother to clean it. As I grew older I learned to tidy up myself.

建議: Be more specific and replace fillers. Use linking words to sequence actions and give a concrete example of your routine.

範例: Normally, after using books, my laptop and pens, I tidy them away immediately. First I put books back on the shelf, then I store pens in a holder, which helps me start the next task quickly.

建議: Clarify your opinion with structured reasoning and avoid long, unclear sentences and fillers. State your view, give one clear reason and a short example, using linking words like "however" or "for example".

範例: I don't think being tidy is always necessary because some people can focus even in a messy space. For example, my colleague works well at a cluttered desk; however, I find neatness helps me concentrate better.

× Yes I do, because if I don't keep it, umm, I'm getting disrupted by umm, stuff around me.

✓ Yes, I do, because if I don't keep things tidy, I get distracted by the stuff around me.

The original uses 'I'm getting disrupted' which is an awkward and incorrect use of the present continuous passive/active for a general state. Use simple present 'I get distracted' to describe a habitual or general result. Also 'keep it' is vague; 'keep things tidy' matches the question. Suggestion: use simple present for habitual states and choose the correct verb 'distracted' instead of 'disrupted'.

× Actually, I didn't when I was a child. I rely on my mother to to clean my room.

✓ Actually, I didn't when I was a child. I relied on my mother to clean my room.

The response refers to a past habit, so the past tense 'relied' is required instead of present 'rely'. Also remove the duplicated 'to'. Suggestion: use past tense for past habits and check for accidental repeated words.

× Normally after using books, computers or umm, pens, I try to clean them up first and then move on to the next actions.

✓ Normally after using books, computers, or pens, I tidy them first and then move on to the next task.

'Clean them up' is acceptable but 'tidy them' is more natural here; 'move on to the next actions' is awkward—'next task' fits better. Also include comma before 'or' for clarity. Suggestion: prefer natural collocations (tidy books, move on to the next task) and concise phrasing.

× I don't think it is always necessary to be tidy. This is because, umm, although the room isn't organized, some people can concentrate on their task otherwise they should, but if they can concentrate on that task, it's not necessary.

✓ I don't think it is always necessary to be tidy. Although a room isn't organized, some people can still concentrate on their tasks, so being tidy is not always necessary for them.

The original has confusing connectors and incorrect use of 'otherwise they should'. Use 'although' to introduce contrast and 'still' to show continuation. Change 'task' to plural 'tasks' for generality and rephrase to a clear logical flow. Suggestion: simplify sentence structure, use proper conjunctions, and keep subject number consistent.