整洁— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and directly answer first, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid long clauses and repetition. Also use more precise vocabulary (e.g., belongings, hobbies, storage) and a clearer structure: topic sentence + brief reason + example.

範例: Yes, I do like to keep things tidy, but it can be difficult for me because I collect items for several hobbies. For example, I have art supplies and model kits that take up a lot of space, so even though I have labeled storage boxes, clutter still accumulates.

建議: Start with a clear topic sentence then give one concise supporting detail. Avoid informal phrases and minor grammar errors (e.g., 'so obsessed with keep' → 'so obsessed with keeping'). Use linking words like 'because' or 'so' correctly and avoid redundancy.

範例: Yes, I did. My father was very particular about order, so he regularly checked my room to make sure everything was in its place.

建議: Give a direct topic sentence about your method, then explain with one or two specific methods using neutral language. Avoid slang or exaggerated expressions ('messy as hell') and correct grammar (use consistent tense and phrasing). Use linking words like 'however' or 'but' to contrast ideas.

範例: I keep my study space organised in my own way: I group items by function and always put frequently used things within reach. However, it may look untidy to others because I don't bother to hide cables or arrange items symmetrically.

建議: Answer directly and keep supporting details focused and accurate. Use precise reasons and a relevant example. Avoid making unclear medical claims (brushing prevents digestive diseases) — instead mention general health and social reasons. Keep it within a few sentences.

範例: Yes, I believe tidiness is important, particularly for personal hygiene. For instance, regular grooming and clean clothes help prevent infections and make a positive impression in social or professional situations.

× it is just such a time consuming and challenging task for me

✓ it is just such a time-consuming and challenging task for me

Compound adjectives before a noun should be hyphenated and 'time-consuming' is a fixed adjective form using -ing. Hyphenation clarifies that 'time-consuming' modifies 'task'. Use of -ing is correct but needs hyphenation.

× I could not live a minimalist lifestyle

✓ I could not live a minimalist lifestyle when I was younger

The original sentence uses 'could not' which implies past ability but the context refers to a general reason now. If the student means past inability, add a time reference like 'when I was younger'. If they mean present inability, use 'cannot'. Clarify tense to match context.

× so obsessed with keep everything in order in our home

✓ so obsessed with keeping everything in order in our home

'obsessed with' must be followed by a noun or gerund (verb+ing). 'Keeping' is the correct gerund form; 'keep' (base form) is incorrect after a preposition.

× he would do frequent checks in my room to make sure every day everything was in its place

✓ he would frequently check my room to make sure every day that everything was in its place

Use 'check' as a verb rather than 'do checks in'. 'Frequently' is the adverb form. Also add 'that' for clarity. 'Do frequent checks in my room' is not ungrammatical but less natural; revise for idiomatic usage.

× he is just a guy who pays a lot of attention to details and so obsessed with keeping everything in order in our home

✓ he is just a guy who pays a lot of attention to details and is so obsessed with keeping everything in order in our home

Two predicates connected by 'and' need verbs. The original omits 'is' before 'so obsessed', causing a parallelism error. Insert 'is' to maintain subject-verb structure.

× I don't think I'm capable of keeping my workspace tidy, but personally speaking I think I can manage my items in order in a personal way

✓ I don't think I'm capable of keeping my workspace tidy, but I can manage my items in an orderly, personal way

'In order' as an adverb phrase is acceptable but 'in an orderly way' is more natural. Combine 'personally speaking I think' to avoid repetition. Use 'orderly' (adjective) with 'way' for smoother style.

× my desk would seem messy as hell

✓ my desk would seem extremely messy

Informal slang 'messy as hell' is inappropriate in formal speech. Use 'extremely messy' to convey degree with a neutral adverb. Also avoid colloquial intensifiers in test responses.

× Maintaining a good personal hygiene habit is not only beneficial to yourself but also respectful for others in social circumstances

✓ Maintaining good personal hygiene is not only beneficial to yourself but also respectful toward others in social situations

Use 'good personal hygiene' without 'habit' (uncountable concept). Use the preposition 'toward' or 'to' (toward preferred) instead of 'for' and say 'social situations' rather than 'social circumstances' for natural phrasing.

× you would want to make sure you brush your teeth twice a day in order to prevent digestive diseases and also to maintain a good image

✓ you would want to make sure you brush your teeth twice a day to prevent dental and digestive problems and to maintain a good image

'In order to' can be simplified to 'to'. 'Prevent digestive diseases' is not the most direct consequence of brushing teeth; mention 'dental problems' or 'oral infections' and 'digestive problems' if intended. Also make parallel structure 'to prevent... and to maintain...' or drop second 'to' as done here.