视图— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and use correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid fillers like “umm”, and use past/future tenses correctly. Add one specific detail and a linking word to clarify why photos are valuable.

範例: Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views because they help me preserve memories. For example, I often photograph family gatherings so that years later I can look back and remember the atmosphere and people. Additionally, photos make it easier to share experiences with friends.

建議: Provide a clear, grammatical topic sentence and support it with specific reasons. Correct sentence structure and vocabulary (e.g. 'three-storied houses'?) and finish sentences. Use linking words like 'because' or 'so' to connect ideas.

範例: I prefer rural views because I grew up in the countryside with my grandparents. For instance, I loved the fresh air, the small three-storey houses, and being able to run around outside, which felt peaceful compared with the city.

建議: Give a clearer opinion and support it with specific comparisons. Avoid vague filler words and complete your sentences. Use linking words such as 'however' or 'for example' to contrast domestic and foreign views.

範例: I don't have a strong preference because both are appealing. For example, China offers diverse landscapes such as the Yangtze River, Yellow River and snowy mountains, while other countries can offer different cultural scenery and architecture, so each has its own attractions.

× Yes, for sure, I think it's a good way to record our life. After many many years, I can still umm, remind me of this experience and the views.

✓ Yes, for sure, I think it's a good way to record our lives. Even after many years, I can still be reminded of those experiences and the views.

Errors: 'our life' should be plural 'our lives' to match general meaning (singular/plural). 'After many many years, I can still umm, remind me of this experience' uses incorrect verb and reflexive structure. Use passive 'be reminded' or active 'the memories remind me' and plural 'those experiences'. Suggestion: use 'our lives' for general habitual reference and 'be reminded of' or 'the memories remind me of' to express that memories evoke the experience.

× Rural areas definitely when I was young, I grew up with my grandparents. It is in the countryside so I love the three stocks, fresh air and I can run around the houses with my.

✓ Rural areas definitely. When I was young, I grew up with my grandparents in the countryside, so I loved the trees, fresh air, and I could run around the houses with them.

Errors: run-on sentence and plural errors. 'It is in the countryside' awkwardly placed; combine clauses for clarity. 'the three stocks' is incorrect — likely 'trees' (plural). 'I can run' should be past 'I could' to match 'when I was young'. Missing object after 'with my' should be 'with them' referring to grandparents. Suggestion: split into sentences, use past tense 'could' and correct plural noun 'trees' and pronoun 'them'.

× I think it's equal for me. You know, China is very a huge country, so we have lots of views like Yangtze River, the Yellow River and the Snow Mountain. Lots of, uh, spectacular.

✓ I think it's the same for me. You know, China is a very huge country, so we have many scenic places like the Yangtze River, the Yellow River, and the snowy mountains. There are many spectacular sights.

Errors: 'equal for me' is unnatural; use 'the same for me'. Word order 'very a huge' is incorrect; correct is 'a very huge'. 'Lots of views' should be 'many scenic places' or 'scenic views'. 'Snow Mountain' likely needs plural or adjective 'snowy mountains'. Fragment 'Lots of, uh, spectacular.' is incomplete; change to full sentence 'There are many spectacular sights.' Suggestion: use natural collocations and complete sentences, fix article usage before proper nouns and pluralize where needed.