视图— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Clarify and simplify your response. Start with a clear topic sentence that directly answers the question, then give one or two specific reasons or examples. Avoid unclear phrases (e.g. “read these things,” “to you know that take a experience”) and reduce hesitations. Use linking words like “because” or “for example.”

範例: Yes, I do. I enjoy photographing different views because it helps me remember places I visit. For example, when I travel to the mountains I take pictures of the sunrise and the landscape so I can share the experience with friends.

建議: Be more concise and precise. Begin with a direct preference, then give one or two specific reasons using clear vocabulary (e.g. “natural scenery,” “peaceful atmosphere”). Remove filler phrases like “you know” and correct grammar (e.g. “breathtaking views”). Use a linking word such as “because” or “so”).

範例: I prefer rural areas because they have more natural and breathtaking scenery. For instance, quiet fields and forests allow me to capture wide landscapes and interesting details without the distractions common in cities.

建議: Give a clear direct answer and avoid contradictory or confused phrasing. State your current preference first, then briefly explain why with specific details. Remove fillers like “umm” and fix grammar (e.g. “it actually has many views” or “quiet scenery”). Use linking words such as “however,” “because,” or “for example.”

範例: At the moment I prefer views in my own country because it offers diverse and peaceful scenery. For example, our coastal cliffs and rural lakes are easy to reach and perfect for photography, although I would like to visit other countries in the future to capture different cultures.

× If I had a chance to read these things somewhere in this earth, I will take a lot of picture of different views to you know that take a experience of myself.

✓ If I had a chance to see these places on this earth, I would take a lot of pictures of different views to gain experience for myself.

Mixed conditional and wrong verbs: 'If I had a chance' sets an unreal present condition requiring 'would' not 'will' (conditional structure). 'read these things' is wrong verb for seeing places; use 'see' or 'visit'. 'this earth' should be 'the earth' or 'on this earth'. 'a lot of picture' needs plural 'pictures'. 'to you know that take a experience of myself' is ungrammatical; replace with 'to gain experience for myself'. Suggestions: use correct conditional verb sequence, choose appropriate verbs (see/visit), pluralize nouns, and use clear purpose phrase 'to gain experience'.

× Well, I think that I would choose rural areas that have a lot of natural views with an A breathtaking views.

✓ Well, I think that I would choose rural areas that have a lot of natural, breathtaking views.

Incorrect article and adjective order: 'with an A breathtaking views' mixes an article with a capitalized adjective and plural noun incorrectly. Remove redundant article 'an' and adjust adjective order: 'natural, breathtaking views'. Also plural 'views' is correct. Suggestion: place adjectives before the noun and remove wrong articles.

× So I can take a lot of picture and I know you know why my openness.

✓ So I can take a lot of pictures, and I hope you know why I am so open.

Problems: 'picture' should be plural 'pictures'. 'I know you know why my openness' is ungrammatical; likely meant 'I hope you know why I am so open' or 'you know my openness'. Use a finite verb 'am' and proper adjective/adverb ('open' or 'openly'). Suggestion: use correct plural forms and clear clause structure with subject and verb.

× Well, I believe that if I have a chance I will visit these other countries and take a lot of picture.

✓ Well, I believe that if I have the chance I will visit other countries and take a lot of pictures.

Minor article and plural issues: 'if I have a chance' is acceptable but 'if I have the chance' is more natural. 'these other countries' is wordy; 'other countries' is better. 'a lot of picture' must be plural 'pictures'. Suggestion: use natural collocations and plural nouns.

× But right now I prefer to choose my country umm because umm, it's actually have a lot of views that we'd have a umm quiet studying.

✓ But right now I prefer my country because it actually has many places where one can study quietly.

Multiple errors: 'prefer to choose my country' is redundant; say 'prefer my country' or 'prefer to stay in my country'. 'it's actually have' mixes subject-verb agreement; should be 'it actually has'. 'a lot of views that we'd have a quiet studying' is unnatural: 'views' wrong for 'places' and 'quiet studying' should be 'study quietly' or 'quiet places to study'. Suggestion: fix subject-verb agreement, choose correct nouns (places), and use correct verb forms for purpose ('study quietly').

× So I love my country than other.

✓ So I love my country more than others.

Incorrect comparative construction: 'love my country than other' lacks comparative marker 'more' and 'other' should be 'others' or 'other countries'. Use 'more than' for comparisons. Suggestion: use 'more than others' or 'more than other countries' for clarity.