旅行— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Good direct response with relevant supporting detail and an example. To improve, make sentences more concise and natural, avoid redundancy (e.g., "by bus or by car" repeated), correct minor grammar (use American/British consistency: traveling/travelled), and use a linking word to connect idea and example (e.g., "for example" is fine but place it smoothly). Aim for 2–4 clear sentences: one topic sentence and one or two specific supporting details.

範例: Yes. I usually look out the window when I travel because I enjoy the greenery and scenic views. For example, on my last bus trip to another city I saw beautiful forests and a large lake, which made the journey very enjoyable.

建議: The answer is relevant but unclear in parts and has grammar and coherence problems. Improve by organizing into a clear topic sentence, then 1–2 precise supporting details. Fix verb forms and word choice (e.g., "clear view", "showed a video" → "record a video", "uploaded it online"), and use linking words like "however" and "for example" correctly. Avoid unnecessary repetition.

範例: Yes, I often take photos or record short videos of the scenery, although the window is sometimes dirty. For example, I roll the window down when possible to get a clearer view, and on my last trip I recorded a short video of the forest and later uploaded it online.

建議: The main idea is clear, but the response has grammatical errors, awkward phrasing, and unclear final clause. Improve by using a clear topic sentence stating preference, then provide specific reasons with correct grammar and linking words (e.g., "because", "so"). Avoid repeated or incorrect verbs like "wind and wind". If comparing, state one or two concrete differences (e.g., "sea breeze helps me relax; mountains feel more strenuous"). Keep answer within 2–4 concise sentences.

範例: I prefer the sea because the sea breeze and open views help me relax. For example, when I visited Georgia and stood by the coast, I felt calmer and could forget daily worries, while the mountains felt more rugged and demanding.

× Yes, I usually look out the window when I'm traveling by bus or by car because I like the greenery and the outstanding views that I get there.

✓ Yes, I usually look out of the window when I'm traveling by bus or by car because I like the greenery and the outstanding views I see there.

Use 'look out of the window' (preposition usage) and prefer simple present for habitual action 'I see' rather than 'that I get there'. This clarifies the action and uses natural collocations. Suggestion: say 'look out of the window' and 'the views I see there'.

× For example, last time I traveled to another city by bus and I had an opportunity to see all the beautiful forests and even the lake there.

✓ For example, last time I traveled to another city by bus and had the opportunity to see the beautiful forests and even the lake there.

Remove redundant auxiliary 'I' after 'and' to maintain parallel past tense structure. Use 'had the opportunity' instead of 'I had an opportunity' for conciseness. Ensure past tense consistency.

× Yes, I usually take photos of the beautiful scenery outside the car window, even though the car window is not always so clean as I want it to be.

✓ Yes, I usually take photos of the beautiful scenery outside the car window, although the car window is not always as clean as I would like it to be.

Use 'although' for contrast and 'as clean as I would like it to be' is the correct comparative structure. 'So clean as' is unidiomatic here. This fixes comparative and tone.

× Sometimes I even pull it down so that I can get a more Clearview and showed a video of forests or lake when I'm traveling by for example.

✓ Sometimes I even roll it down so that I can get a clearer view and take videos of the forests or the lake when I'm traveling, for example.

Use 'roll it down' (phrasal verb) or 'lower it'; 'clearview' is not one word, use 'clearer view'. 'Showed' is past tense but context requires present habitual 'take videos'. Also add articles 'the forests'/'the lake' and reposition 'for example' for clarity.

× Last time I did so and I even downloaded online.

✓ Last time I did so and I even downloaded the videos online.

Specify the object 'the videos' and use 'downloaded online' needs object. Keep past tense 'did' and 'downloaded'. Without object it's incomplete. Also 'downloaded online' is acceptable but clearer with 'downloaded the videos online'.

× I think I prefer the sea.

✓ I think I prefer the sea.

Sentence is grammatically correct. It expresses present preference; no change needed.

× When I had a chance to see both mountains and the sea last time I was in Georgia, I felt like the sea breeze and fresh air was more perfect for me.

✓ When I had a chance to see both the mountains and the sea last time I was in Georgia, I felt that the sea breeze and fresh air were more perfect for me.

Use definite article 'the' with 'mountains'. 'Sea breeze and fresh air' is a compound subject, so plural verb 'were' is required (subject-verb agreement). 'Felt like' -> 'felt that' is more appropriate for reporting a perception.

× It was feeling like I could wind and wind and relax and forget about my everyday problems and mountains require.

✓ It felt like I could unwind, relax, and forget about my everyday problems, whereas the mountains demanded more effort.

Original sentence has ungrammatical structure and word choice: 'It was feeling like' should be 'It felt like'. 'Wind and wind' is incorrect; intended word is 'unwind'. Use commas and parallel verbs 'unwind, relax, and forget'. The clause about mountains is unclear; replace with 'whereas the mountains demanded more effort' to convey contrast. Ensure verbs and clauses are coherent.