食物— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and natural. Start with a clear topic sentence naming the food, then give one or two specific supporting details (how it’s made, why you like it) using linking words. Avoid unnecessary fillers and grammar errors (e.g., “all kinds,” “one need not use oil,” “when I am in a rush I always grab it”).

範例: My favourite food is scrambled eggs with steamed broccoli. I like it because it’s healthy and quick to make — my grandmother taught me to steam the broccoli and scramble the eggs without oil. As a result, it’s low in fat and I can eat it when I’m in a rush.

建議: Give a clear topic sentence and specific details. Avoid hesitations and vague phrases. Name the foods clearly (e.g., ripe mangoes, fried snacks), explain why you liked them, and use linking words like “first” and “also.” Correct grammar: “when I was young,” “grown on our land,” and “the taste suited our palate.”

範例: When I was young, I especially loved ripe mangoes and fried snacks. The mangoes from our land were very juicy and sweet, which suited our family’s taste. Also, I enjoyed deep-fried treats because they were crispy and available at local markets.

建議: Answer directly and clearly. State the seasonal change, give specific examples for each season, and use linking words (e.g., “in winter,” “in contrast,” “because”) to connect ideas. Fix grammar: “we have several distinct seasons,” “our tastes change,” “in winter we prefer…”

範例: Yes, our food choices change with the seasons. In winter, we prefer deep-fried dishes and steamed vegetables because they feel warming and filling. In contrast, during summer we eat lighter, cooling foods like salads, fresh fruit, and chilled drinks.

建議: Provide a clear topic sentence and explain reasons with specific details. Avoid incomplete sentences and fillers. Say what you liked before, what you prefer now, and why (e.g., health knowledge, work experience). Use linking words like “however” or “since.”

範例: Yes, my preferences have changed. As a child I preferred ultra-processed snacks because they were sweet and easy to eat. However, since starting my job I’ve learned more about nutrition and now I choose foods with better texture and higher quality, such as whole grains and fresh vegetables.

× Although I do appreciate having all kind of dishes which are nutritious and healthy enough, here I would like to talk about one of my favorite recipes which is scrambled egg with steamed broccoli.

✓ Although I do appreciate having all kinds of dishes that are nutritious and healthy, here I would like to talk about one of my favorite recipes, which is scrambled eggs with steamed broccoli.

Use 'all kinds of' for plural countable nouns (kinds) and pluralize 'egg' to 'eggs' for the dish name. Replace 'which are' with 'that are' or keep 'that' for defining clauses; here 'that are nutritious and healthy' is appropriate. Also remove extra word 'enough' and add a comma before the nonrestrictive clause. Suggestion: use plural 'kinds' and 'eggs' and simplify clauses to improve clarity.

× Moreover, one need not to use any kind of oil to make it.

✓ Moreover, one need not use any kind of oil to make it.

After 'need' in this impersonal construction the base form of the verb is used without 'to' (need not do). 'Need not to' is incorrect. Alternatively use 'you do not need to use' for a more natural phrasing.

× My grandmother taught me many years ago and whenever I am in rush, I always grab.

✓ My grandmother taught me many years ago, and whenever I am in a rush, I always grab it.

Missing object 'it' after 'grab' and article 'a' before 'rush'. Also add a comma to connect clauses. 'Grab' needs an object (e.g., 'it' meaning the dish) and 'in a rush' is the correct expression.

× There were several kinds of food which I liked the most during my younger day.

✓ There were several kinds of food that I liked most during my younger days.

Use plural 'days' for the period 'younger days' and 'that' is preferable for defining clauses. 'Liked most' is more natural than 'liked the most' in this context. Also 'kinds of food' is acceptable; keep past tense 'were/liked' consistent.

× First and foremost, mango, especially juicy 1 and umm, uh, traditional one, which are being, uh, grown in our own land, uh, and that taste match well with our taste bud.

✓ First and foremost, mangoes, especially the juicy, traditional ones that are grown on our land, match our taste buds well.

Pluralize 'mango' to 'mangoes' and 'one' to 'ones' to refer to multiple fruits. Remove filler sounds. Use 'the juicy, traditional ones' with correct adjective order and plural agreement. Use 'grown on our land' (not 'being grown') and 'match our taste buds' for correct subject-verb agreement and idiomatic expression.

× And secondly, deep fried.

✓ And secondly, deep-fried foods.

'Deep-fried' is an adjective and needs a noun to modify, e.g., 'deep-fried foods' or 'deep-fried dishes.' The original fragment lacks a noun and is incomplete.

× Oh yes, I we have several distinct season in our country and every time our taste bud chains might be due to changes in weather condition, uh, and we uh, prefer deep fried and steamed vegetable during the winter days in the contrast in summer we relation.

✓ Oh yes, we have several distinct seasons in our country, and our tastes often change due to changes in weather. We prefer deep-fried and steamed vegetables during the winter, while in summer we prefer lighter dishes.

Remove the extra 'I' and pluralize 'season' to 'seasons.' 'Taste bud chains' is incorrect; use 'our tastes change.' 'Weather condition' should be plural or generalized as 'weather.' 'Deep-fried and steamed vegetables' needs plural nouns. Clarify contrast with 'while' and provide a complete comparative clause. Also eliminate fillers and fix verb agreement.

× Has your favourite food changed since you were a child?

✓ (Question is fine as written.)

This exam question sentence is grammatically correct and requires no change. It uses present perfect 'has...changed' which is appropriate for a change since childhood.

× Definitely yes. During my childhood I was very much attracted to ultra processed food and the food which were just like gums and need not to chew more.

✓ Definitely yes. During my childhood I was very attracted to ultra-processed food and to foods that were like gum and did not require much chewing.

Use 'ultra-processed' with a hyphen and 'food' can be pluralized to 'foods' or keep 'food' with 'that were like gum.' 'Which were' should be 'that were' for defining clauses. 'Need not to chew more' is incorrect; use 'did not require much chewing' or 'did not need much chewing' to keep past tense consistent.

× But after joining this profession, I understand uh, more about the texture and quality of food and my focused was.

✓ But after joining this profession, I learned more about the texture and quality of food, and my focus changed.

Tense mismatch: use past tense 'learned' after 'after joining.' 'Understand' should be past 'understood' or 'learned.' 'My focused was' is ungrammatical; use 'my focus changed' or 'I became more focused on quality.' Also remove fillers and complete the idea.