食物— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and accurate. Start with a clear topic sentence naming the food, then give one or two specific supporting details (when you first tried it and what you like about it) using proper tense and linking words. Avoid filler sounds and repetition. Also correct grammar (e.g., 'I remember the first time I tried it was in college after I saw a movie with friends').

範例: My favourite food is Chicken Ranch pizza. I first tried it in college after watching a movie with friends, and I liked it because of the creamy sauce and spicy chicken. Since then I often order it when I want something comforting and flavourful.

建議: Give a clear topic sentence and one or two concrete supporting details. Use correct past tense and avoid hesitations and repetition. Link ideas with words like 'because' or 'often' and provide a short reason or memory to make it specific (e.g., where and why you ate it).

範例: When I was young I often liked mixed meat pizza. My family and I would go to the food court after watching movies, and we always shared a large mixed pizza because everyone enjoyed the variety of toppings.

建議: Structure your answer with a clear topic sentence, then explain with one or two specific examples. Use correct present tense and clearer vocabulary (e.g., 'Orthodox Christian' and 'during fasting periods'). Use linking words such as 'for example' or 'so' to connect ideas and improve coherence.

範例: Yes, I eat different foods at different times of the year. For example, as an Orthodox Christian I follow fasting periods when I avoid meat and eat more vegetables and beans; sometimes I include fish during these times.

建議: Answer directly with a clear topic sentence saying whether it changed, then give reasons and examples. Use correct tense and avoid repetition and unclear phrases. Mention specific homemade dishes and explain why you prefer them now (e.g., healthier, enjoy cooking).

範例: Yes, my favourite foods have changed. As a child I preferred junk food, but after I married and started cooking at home I grew to prefer homemade dishes like pasta, chicken and grilled vegetables because they are healthier and taste fresher.

× I remembered, uh, I remember the first time I tried it was when I was in college after I seen movie with my friends.

✓ I remember the first time I tried it was when I was in college after I had seen a movie with my friends.

The verb 'see' requires the past participle 'seen' after 'had' for the past perfect, which is appropriate because the movie-watching occurred before the time of trying the pizza. Use 'I remember' for present recollection and 'had seen' to show the earlier action. Suggestion: use past perfect (had + past participle) to indicate the sequence of past events.

× We go to the pizza shop to, uh, eat something and I found it.

✓ We went to the pizza shop to eat something and I found it there.

The sentence mixes present tense 'go' with past context; use past tense 'went' to match 'found'. Also add 'there' to clarify where 'it' was found. Suggestion: keep consistent tense and include location words when referring back to things.

× So I order it, uh, when I eat it, some creamy and the spicy chicken.

✓ So I ordered it. When I ate it, it was creamy and had spicy chicken.

'Order' and 'eat' should be in past tense to match the narrative (ordered, ate). The original also lacks a main verb describing the pizza's quality; use 'was' and 'had' to describe characteristics in past. Suggestion: use simple past for completed actions and use 'was'/'had' to describe attributes.

× Actually, my kind, uh, my lovely, kind food when I was, uh, young, it was pizza to uh, it's mixed, mixed meat, uh, pizza.

✓ Actually, my favorite food when I was young was mixed meat pizza.

The phrase 'my kind, my lovely, kind food' is redundant and ungrammatical; 'favorite' is the correct adjective. Use past tense 'was' for a past state. Remove filler words and duplicate words. Suggestion: use concise adjective + noun structure: 'my favorite food was X'.

× I eat it when I, I ate it when I, uh, after I hung out with my family watching a movie in the cinema, uh, we went to the food court.

✓ I ate it after I hung out with my family watching a movie at the cinema, then we went to the food court.

The sentence mixes present 'I eat' and past 'I ate'; keep simple past 'I ate' to narrate past events. Also use 'at the cinema' for natural preposition. Suggestion: maintain consistent past tense for past narratives and choose correct prepositions.

× It's such every.

✓ It was everywhere.

'It's such every' is ungrammatical; likely intended meaning is that the pizza was very common or everywhere, so 'It was everywhere' fits. Use past tense 'was' for past context. Suggestion: express frequency/ubiquity with 'everywhere' or 'very common'.

× Actually it depended on the the period of the year according to my relations as I'm Christian orthodoxy Christian so sometimes we are faced so we need to eat vegetables foods like beans and some fasting need to add fish so we add fish plus beans.

✓ Actually, it depends on the time of year because I am an Orthodox Christian, so during some fasting periods we eat vegetables like beans, and sometimes we add fish to our meals.

The original mixes past and present and has awkward phrasing. Use present tense 'depends' for a general statement about repeated annual practice. 'Orthodox Christian' is the standard term. Replace 'vegetables foods' with 'vegetables' and clarify fasting practice. Suggestion: use present simple for habitual facts and restructure the sentence into clearer clauses.

× To be honest, when I was a child I prefer junk food more than the homemade food.

✓ To be honest, when I was a child I preferred junk food more than homemade food.

The sentence refers to a past habitual preference, so use past tense 'preferred' instead of present 'prefer'. Also 'homemade food' doesn't need 'the'. Suggestion: use past simple for past preferences.

× But after I married and I became the person who were responsible for the cook in the home, I like homemade food like pasta, check in and grilled food.

✓ But after I got married and became the person who was responsible for cooking at home, I began to like homemade food like pasta, chicken and grilled dishes.

Use 'got married' or 'married' with 'got' for idiomaticity; 'who were' should be 'who was' to agree with singular 'person'. 'Cook' should be the verb 'cooking' and 'check in' is likely 'chicken'. Use past tense 'began to like' to indicate change after marriage. Suggestion: ensure subject-verb agreement and correct noun/verb forms, and spell words correctly.

× What I made more than junk food, it makes me it makes.

✓ Now I make homemade food more often than I eat junk food; it suits me better.

The original is fragmented and repetitive. Provide a coherent past-to-present contrast: 'Now I make... more often than I eat...' and explain effect 'it suits me better'. Suggestion: combine ideas into a single clear sentence and avoid repetition.