走路— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Clarify meaning, avoid incorrect words, use a clear topic sentence and concise supporting details. Correct the phrase “lose my wife” to the intended meaning (probably “lose weight”), use linking words to show reasons, and limit to 3–4 short sentences. Focus on natural phrasing and correct grammar (subject-verb agreement, verb forms, and vocabulary).

範例: No, I don't walk much at the moment, but I want to start. I hope to lose weight and improve my health, so I plan to walk regularly. I also think walking will boost my energy and improve my mood.

建議: Begin with a direct, relevant topic sentence and give clear, specific supporting details about activities and feelings. Avoid confusing phrases like “work as a exercise” or irrelevant remarks (“my home is very healthy”). Use linking words (for example, because, so) and correct tense consistency. Keep it concise (3–4 sentences).

範例: Yes, I often went outside to walk when I was a child. For example, I used to play and walk around the neighborhood every afternoon, which kept me active. Because of that regular activity, I felt fit and less stressed.

建議: Start with a clear opinion sentence and then give two or three specific reasons using linking words (for example, because, also, or). Avoid redundancy (‘work as a exercising’, ‘make their health healthy’). Use appropriate vocabulary (relax, reduce stress, exercise, scenery). Keep answers concise and structured.

範例: People like to walk in parks because they can relax and reduce stress. They also enjoy exercising in a pleasant environment and watching nature or other people, which makes the walk more enjoyable.

建議: Give a clear topic sentence naming the place, then add specific reasons using linking words. Avoid repetition and unclear phrases (‘walk alone all with my partner’). Use precise vocabulary (environment, peaceful, riverside path) and keep it to 2–4 sentences. Mention whether you prefer company or solitude clearly.

範例: I would like to take a long walk along a riverside path because the fresh air and flowing water are very calming. I find the peaceful scenery refreshing, and I enjoy walking there either alone for quiet time or with a friend for conversation.

建議: Use past tense for recent actions, make a clear topic sentence about where you walked, and give brief reasons. Avoid filler phrases and repetition. Correct grammar (I walked, it is far) and be concise. Mention frequency or reasons you couldn't go elsewhere. Limit to 2–3 sentences.

範例: Recently I walked around my neighborhood; I usually do this as a form of exercise. I would prefer to walk by the river, but it is too far from my home, so I cannot go there often.

× No I don't but I want to improve it because I want to lose my wife.

✓ No, I don't, but I want to improve my fitness because I want to lose weight.

Confused word choice: 'lose my wife' is incorrect and likely meant 'lose weight'. Also 'improve it' is vague; replace with 'improve my fitness'. Use commas to separate clauses. Suggestion: choose accurate vocabulary (weight vs wife) and specify the object of 'improve'.

× I want to do exercise so that's why I want to walk a lot to improve my health.

✓ I want to exercise, so I plan to walk a lot to improve my health.

Use of 'do exercise' is acceptable but less natural than 'exercise'. 'That's why' is redundant with 'so'; streamline the sentence. Preposition 'to' before 'improve my health' is correct; main issue is word choice and redundancy. Suggestion: use concise connectors and natural verb forms.

× I don't know but it make me feel more powerful because I so I want to change my happy.

✓ I don't know, but it makes me feel more energetic, so I want to change my mood.

Verb agreement: 'it make' should be 'it makes'. Many words are incorrect: 'more powerful' may be intended as 'more energetic' and 'change my happy' is ungrammatical; use 'change my mood'. Suggestion: ensure subject-verb agreement and choose correct nouns ('mood' not 'happy').

× Did you often go outside to have a walk when you were a child?

✓ Did you often go outside for a walk when you were a child?

Question uses past tense correctly, but 'to have a walk' is non-native; the common expression is 'go for a walk'. Suggestion: use fixed expressions ('go for a walk').

× When I was a child I really loved going outside to work as a exercise for me.

✓ When I was a child I really loved going outside to exercise.

'To work as a exercise for me' is incorrect. Use the verb 'to exercise' or 'as exercise' without 'a'. Also 'work' is unnecessary. Suggestion: use 'to exercise' or 'as exercise'.

× And yes, my home is very healthy.

✓ And yes, I was very healthy at home.

'Home is healthy' is odd; people are healthy, not homes. Context implies the speaker felt healthy as a child. Suggestion: say 'I was very healthy' or 'my home environment was healthy' if referring to surroundings.

× I can see myself in the mirror, I see my body is very fit and also I'm not stressed anymore when I'm going to work as a exercising.

✓ I could see myself in the mirror; my body was very fit, and I wasn't stressed when I was exercising or when I went to work.

Tense consistency: talking about childhood requires past tense. 'Going to work as a exercising' is ungrammatical; choose 'when I was exercising' or 'when I went to work'. Suggestion: keep past tense and use correct noun forms ('exercising' as verb activity).

× For my opinion, I think they go to see the people around there to relax their stress and also to learn something new from other people on their place and also they work as a exercising to make their health healthy and also enjoy the view over there.

✓ In my opinion, people go there to meet others, relieve stress, learn new things from others, exercise to improve their health, and enjoy the view.

Many preposition and word-choice errors: 'For my opinion' should be 'In my opinion'; 'relax their stress' should be 'relieve stress'; 'on their place' should be 'in that place' or omitted; 'work as a exercising' is incorrect—use 'exercise'; 'make their health healthy' is redundant—use 'improve their health'. Suggestion: use common phrases and avoid literal translations.

× I would walk along the river because I really love the fresh air around there.

✓ I would walk along the river because I really love the fresh air there.

Sentence is mostly correct but 'around there' is wordy; 'there' is sufficient. Suggestion: simplify prepositional phrases.

× I love the environments, I love fresh air, I love water.

✓ I love the environment, fresh air, and water.

'Environments' is plural and unnatural here; use the uncountable 'environment'. Also combine similar items into one fluent list. Suggestion: use singular 'environment' when referring generally.

× So it make me feel fresh and comfortable to walk even though I walk alone all with my partner.

✓ So it makes me feel refreshed and comfortable to walk, whether I walk alone or with my partner.

Pronoun and verb errors: 'it make' -> 'it makes'; 'fresh' -> 'refreshed' as adjective describing feeling; 'even though I walk alone all with my partner' is contradictory—use 'whether... or...'. Suggestion: maintain parallel structure for alternatives.

× Where did you go for a walk lately?

✓ Where did you go for a walk recently?

'Lately' can be used but 'recently' is more natural in questions about specific past actions. Tense is correct (past simple). Suggestion: prefer 'recently' for clarity.

× I walk around my house, you know, with such a boring, but I should do that to do as a work exercising.

✓ I walked around my house, you know, which is quite boring, but I should do it as exercise.

Tense inconsistency: question asked about recent past; use past tense 'walked'. Phrases 'with such a boring' is incorrect—use 'which is quite boring'. 'Do as a work exercising' is ungrammatical; use 'as exercise'. Suggestion: match tense to question and use natural expressions.

× I would love to walk along the river, but unfortunately I don't have to I don't have I have it's so far from my home, I cannot go there.

✓ I would love to walk along the river, but unfortunately I can't because it's so far from my home.

Mixed negatives and repetition: 'I don't have to I don't have I have' is garbled. Use 'I can't' or 'I cannot' and give reason 'it's so far'. Suggestion: avoid repeating words and use a single clear negative construction.

× So I.

✓ So I couldn't go.

Fragment: 'So I.' is incomplete and lacks a verb. Complete the thought by adding the result clause, e.g., 'So I couldn't go.' Suggestion: ensure sentences contain a subject and a verb to convey a complete idea.