走路— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Good content and clear purpose, but reduce redundancy and correct minor grammar to sound more natural. Keep answers concise (max 5 sentences) and use linking words for coherence.

範例: Yes, I walk almost every day. I aim for about 13,000 steps to lose weight and improve my health. I also started this habit two weeks ago to explore London before returning to Japan, so it serves both exercise and sightseeing purposes.

建議: Answer is relevant and gives personal detail, but contains repetition and some awkward phrasing. Use concise structure: direct topic sentence, one or two specific supporting details, and a linking word to add reflection.

範例: No, I rarely went outside because my mother was very protective when I was about five or six. Instead, I spent most of my free time playing video games at home, which I remember well. In hindsight, I wish I had spent more time outdoors.

建議: Strong, specific answer with personal example. To improve further, add a linking phrase and vary vocabulary slightly to sound more natural and succinct.

範例: People often walk in parks to relieve stress and enjoy natural scenery, including wildlife and greenery. For example, when I want to relax I walk in the nearby park to watch squirrels and birds, which always cheers me up.

建議: Good reasons and consideration of timing, but watch grammar and phrasing (e.g., 'desert-made landscapes' is awkward). Use concise linking words and correct modal verb use.

範例: I'd like to walk around the pyramids in Cairo because I'm fascinated by ancient history and archaeology. I've also heard the desert landscapes are spectacular, so I would prefer to visit in spring to avoid the intense summer heat.

建議: The answer is specific, but contains incorrect phrase ('Big Ben' not 'Big Bang') and some repetition. Correct factual errors, avoid repeating opinions, and use one linking word to connect ideas.

範例: I recently walked along the South Bank of the Thames in London for about an hour. The view of Big Ben and the river was stunning, and the area has many food markets and cozy cafés, so I found it very enjoyable.

× My daily routine is aiming at around 13,000 steps a day to lose my weight and be much healthier than I am right now.

✓ My daily routine is to aim for around 13,000 steps a day to lose weight and be much healthier than I am now.

The phrase 'is aiming' uses a present participle where the infinitive or to-infinitive 'is to aim' or simply 'I aim' is more natural for describing a routine (Grammar Problem Type 10). Also 'aim at' followed by a number is less idiomatic than 'aim for'. 'Lose my weight' should be 'lose weight' (article not needed) and 'right now' is redundant with 'now'; 'now' is more concise.

× I started this habit about two weeks ago to explore London before coming back to Japan.

✓ I started this habit about two weeks ago to explore London before coming back to Japan.

No grammatical correction needed for tense; sentence is acceptable. (Included only to indicate no change required.)

× No, I didn't often go outside when I was a child because my mother was so protective that she didn't often let me go out when I was around 5 or 6.

✓ No, I didn't often go outside when I was a child because my mother was so protective that she didn't often let me go out when I was around five or six.

The original sentence uses past tense correctly. Change number format to words for formality and consistency; no tense error. (Included to show no grammatical change except formatting.)

× Instead, I usually spent my free time playing video games at home, which was very memorable.

✓ Instead, I usually spent my free time playing video games at home, which was very memorable to me.

The clause 'which was very memorable' needs an object or modifier to show whose memory; adding 'to me' clarifies the meaning. The tense 'spent' is past and fits 'when I was a child.' This addresses clarity rather than a strict participle error but fits Grammar Problem Type 9 requirements for correct past participle usage in modifier clauses.

× But I wish I could have gone.

✓ But I wish I had been able to go.

When expressing regret about a past event that did not happen, the correct form is 'I wish I had been able to' or 'I wish I could have gone' is acceptable conversationally. 'I wish I could have gone' is common, but 'I wish I had been able to go' is more formal and matches the past context (Grammar Problem Type 4).

× I think many people like visiting parks because they can relieve their stress by seeing lots of beautiful scenery, wildlife and greenery.

✓ I think many people like visiting parks because they can relieve their stress by seeing lots of beautiful scenery, wildlife, and greenery.

Comma insertion before the last item in a list (Oxford comma) improves clarity. No major preposition error; this primarily clarifies punctuation. (Listed under Grammar Problem Type 11 for preposition/clarity concerns.)

× As for me, when I want to relax, I usually walk around the park near my home to look for the squirrels and birds there, which makes me feel happy.

✓ As for me, when I want to relax, I usually walk around the park near my home to look for the squirrels and birds there, which makes me happy.

'Makes me feel happy' is acceptable, but 'makes me happy' is more concise and idiomatic. Present tense 'want' and 'usually walk' correctly match habitual action (Grammar Problem Type 10).

× I would like to walk around the pyramids in Cairo because I'm very interested in ancient history and archaeology.

✓ I would like to walk around the pyramids in Cairo because I'm very interested in ancient history and archaeology.

Sentence is grammatically correct; no article change needed. (Included to show no change.)

× In addition, I've heard that the nature and desert made landscapes there is incredible.

✓ In addition, I've heard that the natural desert landscapes there are incredible.

Original has mixed word order and subject-verb disagreement: 'the nature and desert made landscapes there is' is ungrammatical. Rewriting to 'the natural desert landscapes there are incredible' corrects noun phrase formation and uses plural 'are' to match 'landscapes' (Grammar Problem Type 26 and 27).

× However, I heard that Cairo is too hot to stay for long during the summer, so I'd like to be there in the spring.

✓ However, I've heard that Cairo is too hot to stay in for long during the summer, so I'd like to go there in the spring.

'I heard' is acceptable, but 'I've heard' connects better to present opinion. Use 'stay in' rather than 'stay for long' and 'go there' rather than 'be there' for idiomatic phrasing. This addresses present-tense relevance and preposition use (Grammar Problem Type 6 and 11).

× I recently walked along the Thames River in the South Bank in London for about an hour.

✓ I recently walked along the Thames on the South Bank in London for about an hour.

Use 'the Thames' (river name often without 'River') and 'on the South Bank' is the idiomatic preposition. Past tense 'walked' with 'recently' is correct (Grammar Problem Type 5 and 11).

× I thought the view created by Big Bang along Thames was stunning and there are many food markets and cozy cafes, so I thought the place is very enjoyable and worth visiting.

✓ I thought the view created by the London skyline along the Thames was stunning, and there are many food markets and cozy cafes, so I thought the area was very enjoyable and worth visiting.

'Big Bang' is incorrect for the skyline; likely 'Big Ben' or 'the skyline' was intended. 'Along Thames' needs 'the Thames' and 'the area' or 'place' should match past tense 'was'. Change 'is' to 'was' to keep tense consistent with 'I thought'. This fixes word choice, article use, and tense agreement (Grammar Problem Type 13, 17, and 5).