走路— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more direct and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence answering the question, then add one or two specific supporting details. Correct grammar (e.g. use present tense, correct verbs) and avoid redundancy.

範例: Not really. My job keeps me very busy during the week, but on my days off I take my daughter to the playground and we walk around the park for about half an hour. I find this short walk relaxing and a nice way to spend time together.

建議: Good structure and relevant details. Improve coherence by combining sentences with linking words and using a more natural phrasing (avoid starting sentences with 'Because' without connection). Add a brief specific example to make it more vivid.

範例: Yes, I often went for walks as a child to get fresh air and enjoy the sunshine. For example, I would walk to the small park near my school after classes to clear my head and relax before doing my homework.

建議: Strong, informative answer. Improve grammatical accuracy (subject-verb agreement) and use a linking word to connect the two main ideas more smoothly. You could add a concrete example or brief result to illustrate the benefit.

範例: People enjoy walking in parks because the trees and plants make the surroundings attractive and help purify polluted air, which benefits both mental and physical health. Moreover, parks offer pleasant spaces for relaxation and activities, so people often feel less stressed and more energetic after a walk.

建議: Very good: clear topic sentence, specific details, and personal preference. Improve minor phrasing (e.g. 'soak up in' -> 'soak up') and combine ideas slightly for fluency. Mentioning a short reason why morning light is preferable adds value.

範例: I would like to walk around Shrimp Lake in Nanjing because it is full of flowers like lotuses and water lilies. It would be perfect for taking photos and soaking up the beautiful scenery, especially in the early morning when the soft light makes the colors more vivid.

建議: Clear and specific answer. To improve, make the opening sentence more direct and use a linking word to connect reasons. Add one brief specific detail about an activity you did there to enrich the response.

範例: Recently I went for walks with my daughter in People's Park, which is only a short walk from our community. The park is peaceful and full of different trees and colorful flowers, so we often stroll along the lake and sometimes feed the ducks when we visit on weekends.

× 'No really, I don't work very often because my job keeps me busy.'

✓ 'No, not really; I don't work very often because my job keeps me busy.'

'No really' is informal and missing a comma; 'not really' is the usual negative response. Adding commas and a semicolon clarifies the sentence and improves flow. Suggestion: use 'No, not really' or 'No, I don't really' to respond naturally.'

× 'However on my days off I really take my daughter to the playground and we still around the park for half an hour which I find relaxing and enjoyable.'

✓ 'However, on my days off I usually take my daughter to the playground and we stroll around the park for half an hour, which I find relaxing and enjoyable.'

'However on' needs a comma after 'However'. 'Really take my daughter' is awkward here; 'usually take' fits the habitual meaning. 'We still around' is ungrammatical; the intended verb is 'stroll' or 'walk'. A comma is needed before the relative clause 'which I find...'. Use clearer vocabulary and correct verb form.'

× 'Yes, when I was young, I often went for walks to get some fresh air and enjoy the sunshine.'

✓ 'Yes, when I was young I often went for walks to get some fresh air and enjoy the sunshine.'

'When I was young, I often' is correct but the comma after 'young' is optional; removing the extra comma tightens the sentence. This is a minor punctuation issue rather than tense. Keep past tense 'went' matching the time reference.'

× 'Because I had a lot of school work, walking outside was a great way to unwind and relieve stress from study.'

✓ 'Because I had a lot of schoolwork, walking outside was a great way to unwind and relieve stress from studying.'

'School work' is usually one word 'schoolwork'. 'Relieve stress from study' is awkward; use the gerund 'studying' to show the source of stress. The sentence structure is improved by using standard noun forms.'

× 'People like to walk in parks because there are many trees and plants that makes the surroundings attractive and help purify the polluted air, which benefits people mentally and physically.'

✓ 'People like to walk in parks because there are many trees and plants that make the surroundings attractive and help purify polluted air, which benefits people mentally and physically.'

'That makes' is incorrect because the subject 'trees and plants' is plural, so the verb should be 'make' (subject-verb agreement). Also 'help purify the polluted air' can be streamlined to 'help purify polluted air'. Fix subject-verb agreement and simplify the noun phrase.'

× 'Also, parks provide pleasant spaces for relaxation and recreation.'

✓ 'Also, parks provide pleasant spaces for relaxation and recreation.'

'Also, parks provide...' is grammatically correct. No change needed; present simple is appropriate to state a general truth.'

× 'If I had a chance, I would take a walk around Shrimp Lake in Nanjing because it has lots of flowers such as lotuses and water lilies.'

✓ 'If I had the chance, I would take a walk around Shrimp Lake in Nanjing because it has lots of flowers, such as lotuses and water lilies.'

'If I had a chance' is understandable but 'the chance' is more natural in this conditional. Add a comma before 'such as' to set off the example phrase. Otherwise the second conditional and verbs are correct.'

× 'It would be a perfect spot to snap some photos and soak up in the stunning view.'

✓ 'It would be a perfect spot to snap some photos and soak up the stunning view.'

'Soak up' is a transitive phrasal verb that does not take the preposition 'in' before its object. Use 'soak up the view' rather than 'soak up in the view'. Remove the extra preposition.'

× 'It's better in the morning when the light is beautiful.'

✓ 'It's best in the morning when the light is beautiful.'

'Better' compares two or more options but none is stated; 'best' is more natural to mean the ideal time. Present simple 'is' correctly describes a general preference; change 'better' to 'best' for clarity.'

× 'I recently went for walks with my daughter in People's Park, which is a short walk from my community.'

✓ 'I recently went for a walk with my daughter in People's Park, which is a short walk from my community.'

'Went for walks' suggests repeated action, but 'recently' with singular event needs 'went for a walk'. Choose plural or singular consistently. Use singular 'a walk' to match 'recently' describing one recent outing.'

× 'The park is peaceful and full of different kinds of trees and colorful flowers, so we enjoy spending time there almost every weekend.'

✓ 'The park is peaceful and full of different kinds of trees and colorful flowers, so we enjoy spending time there almost every weekend.'

'The park is peaceful...' is grammatically correct and appropriately uses present simple to describe habitual action. No change needed.'