规则— Part 1 評分報告

建議: 답변이 자연스럽고 명확하지만, 부정적인 의견 표현이 다소 강하고 문장 연결이 매끄럽지 않습니다. 좀 더 긍정적이거나 중립적인 어조를 사용하고, 연결어를 활용해 문장 간 논리적 흐름을 개선하세요.

範例: Yes, there are several rules at my school. For example, students are required to wear a school uniform every day. Although some students find this rule unnecessary, it helps maintain discipline and a sense of unity among us.

建議: 답변이 문법적으로 부정확하고 중복된 단어가 있습니다. 문장을 명확하고 간결하게 구성하고, 연결어를 사용해 생각을 체계적으로 표현하세요.

範例: Yes, I believe that having more rules can help students become more responsible. For instance, rules teach us to respect others and understand the consequences of our actions, which is important for becoming good citizens.

建議: 답변이 단편적이고 문장 구조가 불완전합니다. 주제 문장과 구체적인 지원 내용을 연결어로 자연스럽게 이어서 완전한 문장으로 표현하세요.

範例: Yes, my first English teacher, Mr. Demetri Risopolis, was excellent. He helped me improve my pronunciation and speaking skills, and he also taught me about the attitudes and manners needed when interacting with people from other countries, which was very helpful.

× That was quite ridiculous for me.

✓ That is quite ridiculous for me.

The sentence refers to a current opinion about the school uniform rule, so the present tense 'is' should be used instead of the past tense 'was'.

× but the schools are still maintaining that.

✓ but the school is still maintaining that.

The subject 'school' is singular, so the verb should be singular 'is' instead of plural 'are'. Also, 'maintaining' is awkward here; 'enforcing' or 'keeping' would be better, but per instructions only grammar issues are corrected.

× Yes, I like in school, in society and people have to be responsible for their actions, so school needs to help help students to follow the rules to become the better citizens.

✓ Yes, I think in school and in society, people have to be responsible for their actions, so school needs to help students follow the rules to become better citizens.

The original sentence has missing words and awkward phrasing. 'I like in school' is incorrect; it should be 'I think in school'. Also, 'help help' is a repetition error. 'Help students to follow' is better as 'help students follow'. 'The better citizens' should be 'better citizens' without 'the'.

× Yes, my first English teacher, Demetri Risopolis at high school.

✓ Yes, my first English teacher at high school was Demetri Risopolis.

The original sentence is a fragment lacking a verb. Adding 'was' completes the sentence and clarifies the meaning.

× He really helped me, correcting my pronunciations and how I speak, the attitude and manner about foreign country, it really helped me a lot.

✓ He really helped me by correcting my pronunciation and how I speak, as well as my attitude and manners regarding foreign countries; it really helped me a lot.

The original sentence is a run-on with unclear phrasing. 'Pronunciations' should be singular 'pronunciation'. 'Attitude and manner about foreign country' is awkward; 'attitude and manners regarding foreign countries' is clearer. The sentence is split with a semicolon for clarity.