教师— Part 1 评分报告

建议: 직접적으로 질문에 답한 후 이유와 구체적인 예를 연결하는 연습이 필요합니다. 문법 오류(관사, 시제, 인칭)와 불필요한 중복 표현(예: "I was. I'm a big fan of her.")을 고치세요. 간단한 문장 구조로 명확히 말하고 linking word(so, because, for example)를 사용해 논리를 이어주세요.

示例: Yes, I do. One of my favorite teachers was my high school science teacher because she was very kind and supportive. For example, she spent extra time after class helping me understand difficult experiments, which made learning fun.

建议: 주장(너무 불확실한 표현)과 이유를 명확히 말하는 연습이 필요합니다. 망설이는 소리(um, uh)와 중복을 줄이고 조건문을 간결하게 쓰세요. 또한 직업 희망을 말할 때 이유와 관련 경험을 하나 덧붙이면 설득력이 증가합니다.

示例: Yes, I would like to be a teacher. If I become one, I would teach history because it was my favorite subject and I enjoy explaining historical events to others. For instance, I often helped classmates prepare for history tests.

建议: 부정적인 감정 표현은 괜찮지만, 더 자연스럽고 정중한 표현을 사용하세요. 문법 오류(시제, 어순, 동사 형태)를 고치고 이유를 구체적으로 설명하세요. 또한 감정을 설명할 때 예를 들어 상황을 제시하면 좋습니다.

示例: Yes. I still remember my class teacher when I was 19. She was memorable because her teaching style didn’t suit me; for example, she was very strict and rarely explained things in detail, which made it hard for me to follow.

建议: 부정 대답은 괜찮지만 이유 설명을 더 자연스럽게 말하세요. 어색한 표현("who talk with each other", "common of chatting")을 수정하고 linking phrase(“after graduation”, “so”, “because”)를 사용해 논리를 연결하세요.

示例: No, I'm not. I don't keep in touch with my primary school teachers because it's not common for students and teachers to stay in contact after graduation. However, I do sometimes follow their news on social media.

建议: 구체적인 도움 내용(예: 학업적 조언, 정서적 지원)을 명확히 제시하세요. 나이/시기 표현을 정확히 하고 문장 완결성을 유지하세요. 반복과 불완전한 문장("She was so kind that while")을 피하고 연결어를 사용해 사례를 제시하세요.

示例: She helped me both academically and personally. For example, she encouraged me to improve my grades by giving extra tutoring and supported me when I was unwell, often checking on my health after class.

建议: 의견을 제시할 때 명확한 비교 구조를 사용하세요. 문법(‘more kinder’ → ‘kinder’), 불완전한 이유 제시를 고치고 구체적 근거(예: primary teachers are more patient)와 연결구를 사용하세요. 망설임을 줄이고 간결하게 말하세요.

示例: I would say primary school teachers are generally kinder than high school teachers because they need to be more patient and nurturing with young children. For example, primary teachers often focus on social skills as well as basic learning.

× One of my the best teacher is the science teacher at my high school.

✓ One of my best teachers is the science teacher at my high school.

The phrase 'one of the best' requires a plural noun after 'one of' and the definite article 'the' before 'best' is unnecessary when used with 'one of my'. Remove the extra 'the' and pluralize 'teacher' to 'teachers'. Suggestion: Use 'one of my best teachers' when referring to a single person from a group.

× She was really kind and pretty, so I was.

✓ She was really kind and pretty, so I liked her.

The clause 'so I was' is incomplete and incorrect because 'was' needs a complement (adjective or noun). The intended meaning is to express liking, so use 'I liked her'. Suggestion: Use a verb that expresses the reaction (like, admire) instead of 'was'.

× I'm a big fan of her.

✓ I'm a big fan of hers.

After the preposition 'of', use the possessive pronoun 'hers' rather than the object pronoun 'her'. 'A fan of hers' is the idiomatic expression. Suggestion: Use possessive pronouns after 'of' (e.g., 'a friend of mine', 'a fan of hers').

× Uh, yes, I risk, umm, if I, if I could be a teacher, I want to be a history teacher 'cause my favorite subject was that and I think I'm good.

✓ Yes, if I could be a teacher, I would want to be a history teacher because my favorite subject was history and I think I'm good at it.

The original sentence misuses modals and tense consistency. Use 'would' for hypothetical wishes ('if I could... I would...'). Replace colloquial 'cause' with 'because' and clarify 'was that' to 'was history'. Add 'at it' after 'good' to show competence. Suggestion: Use conditional structure 'If I could..., I would...' and ensure the subject and complement are clear.

× I, I will be a good teacher.

✓ I will be a good teacher.

Repeat of 'I' is unnecessary and redundant. Remove the extra 'I'. Suggestion: Avoid stuttering repetitions in written correction unless quoting speech; use a single subject.

× Yes, that is my uh, my class teacher when I was 19 years old.

✓ Yes, that was my class teacher when I was 19 years old.

Tense mismatch: 'is' suggests present while the context refers to the past. Use past tense 'was' to match 'when I was 19'. Suggestion: Keep verb tenses consistent with time expressions.

× Why she is a memorable teacher is that she's personally is not suits me and I really hate her.

✓ The reason she is a memorable teacher is that she did not suit me personally and I really disliked her.

Multiple errors: word order and form ('Why she is' should be 'The reason she is'), 'personally is not suits me' incorrect verb form and placement — use 'did not suit me personally' and past tense 'disliked' to match past context. 'Suit' is intransitive here meaning 'fit my personality'. Suggestion: Use 'the reason' construction and correct verb forms, keep tense consistent.

× No, actually I don't have any teacher who talk with each other because I think it is not common of chatting with teachers after graduation.

✓ No, actually I don't have any teachers who I talk to because I think it is not common to chat with teachers after graduation.

Pluralize 'teacher' to 'teachers' after 'any'. Use correct verb form 'talk' -> 'talk to' and relative clause 'who I talk to'. 'Common of chatting' is incorrect; use 'common to chat'. Suggestion: Use plural nouns after 'any' when appropriate and correct verb-preposition combinations ('talk to', 'chat with').

× My favorite teacher was my high school teachers at 11, I don't know, 17 years.

✓ My favorite teacher was my high school teacher when I was, I don't know, 17 years old.

Confused singular/plural: 'My favorite teacher was my high school teachers' should be singular 'teacher'. Also the time phrase needs 'when I was 17 years old'. Suggestion: Match subject number and use standard age expression 'when I was 17 years old'.

× She encouraged me a lot about my grade, grades and my health.

✓ She encouraged me a lot about my grades and my health.

Redundant 'grade, grades' — use 'grades' plural. 'About my grades' is sufficient. Suggestion: Avoid repeating words and use plural where referring to multiple subjects or overall performance.

× So yeah, she was very kind. She was so kind that while.

✓ So yeah, she was very kind.

The second sentence 'She was so kind that while.' is a sentence fragment lacking completion. Remove it or complete the clause (e.g., 'She was so kind that she helped everyone'). Suggestion: Avoid sentence fragments; ensure 'so... that' clauses are completed with a consequence.

× Oh, though I can't remember about my primary teachers for uh, I think primary teachers are more kinder than high school teachers because to, umm, because I how? Because children are.

✓ I can't remember my primary teachers well, but I think primary teachers are kinder than high school teachers because of the age of the children.

'More kinder' is wrong — 'kinder' is the comparative form, not 'more kinder'. 'Remember about' should be 'remember'. The clause 'because to... because I how? Because children are.' is incomplete; clarify as 'because of the age of the children'. Suggestion: Use 'kinder' not 'more kinder'; use 'remember' without 'about' in this context; complete causal explanations.