教师— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more concise and avoid repetition. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give 1–2 specific supporting details using linking words. Reduce hesitations (uh) and combine short sentences to sound more natural.

示例: Yes. My favorite teacher was my college anatomy lecturer because she was energetic and practical. For example, she gave me one-on-one help when I struggled with dissections, and she explained complex concepts with clear diagrams, which made the subject much easier to understand.

建议: Make the answer more direct and correct grammar (tense and articles). Give a clear plan with one or two specific reasons or examples and use linking words (because, so). Avoid irrelevant childhood detail unless it supports your reason concisely.

示例: Yes. I would like to become a university professor in Canada once I complete my PhD because I enjoy researching and explaining ideas. For instance, I already enjoy mentoring classmates during projects, so teaching at a reputable university would allow me to continue that work.

建议: Clarify unclear phrasing (e.g., 'anointing teacher'—use a clearer term) and correct verb forms. Use a topic sentence, then give specific examples of how she supported you, linked with words like 'for example' or 'because'.

示例: Yes. One teacher I still keep in touch with is my college mentor because she was very approachable and supportive. For example, she met me weekly to review my assignments and regularly praised my progress, which kept me motivated during difficult semesters.

建议: Improve clarity and grammar. Give a concise reason with correct structure and one specific detail. Avoid filler words and correct the awkward phrase about 'dozen' and relationships.

示例: No, I am not. It has been many years since primary school, and I did not keep personal contact with my teachers because there were many of them and we did not form close relationships. As a result, I lost touch after leaving school.

建议: Be specific and correct unclear phrases ('not me subject'). Start with a direct topic sentence describing the main ways she helped, then give one concrete example or result using linking words like 'for example' or 'as a result'. Reduce hesitation sounds.

示例: My anatomy teacher helped me both academically and personally. For example, she gave me one-on-one sessions when I struggled with difficult topics, explained concepts with practical demonstrations, and encouraged me during exam periods, which improved my grades and confidence.

× Yes, I do have a favorite teacher and she was my anatomy teacher in my college.

✓ Yes, I have a favorite teacher; she was my anatomy teacher in college.

The student uses 'do have' which is unnecessary in simple present affirmative statements. Also 'in my college' is more natural as 'in college' or 'at my college'. Use simple present 'I have' to state a current fact and 'she was my anatomy teacher' to indicate past role. Suggestion: Use 'I have' for current possession and 'in college' or 'at my college' for the location.

× She used to teach us anatomy.

✓ She used to teach us anatomy.

This sentence is correct. 'Used to' correctly expresses a past habitual action followed by the base verb 'teach'. No change needed.

× She was very uh, energetic and practical.

✓ She was very energetic and practical.

Fillers like 'uh' should be removed in written responses. The adjectives 'energetic' and 'practical' are correctly used; just remove hesitation. Suggestion: Avoid filler words in formal answers.

× She was very friendly and listened to my queries and even gave me personal assistance whenever I required.

✓ She was very friendly, listened to my questions, and even gave me personal assistance whenever I needed it.

'Queries' is formal but 'questions' is more natural here. 'Whenever I required' is unidiomatic; use 'whenever I needed it' or 'when I needed help'. Also parallel verbs should be connected with commas and 'and'. Suggestion: Use 'needed' for natural past tense and keep parallel structure.

× Yes, if the things go as planned and I had my PhD degree after that, I would like to be a professor at one of the reputable universities of Canada.

✓ Yes, if things go as planned and I obtain my PhD, I would like to be a professor at one of the reputable universities in Canada.

Mixed conditional tense error: 'if the things go as planned' (present) pairs with 'I had my PhD' (past) incorrectly. Use 'if things go as planned and I obtain/get my PhD' to keep consistent present real future context. Also use 'in Canada' and 'obtain my PhD' or 'get my PhD'. Suggestion: Keep tenses consistent in conditionals: present simple in 'if' clause for future real conditions.

× I have a keen interest in teaching.

✓ I have a keen interest in teaching.

This sentence is correct. 'Have a keen interest' is proper present-tense expression; no change needed.

× When I was childhood, I used to teach my friends when I was little and play with them.

✓ When I was a child, I used to teach and play with my friends.

Use 'a child' not 'childhood' after 'when I was'. Also combine repeated ideas to avoid redundancy: 'when I was little' duplicates 'when I was a child'. Suggestion: Use 'When I was a child' or 'When I was little' and avoid repeating the same idea.

× Yes, I remember most of my teachers but the one that was very close to me and is still in contact with me is my anointing teacher.

✓ Yes, I remember most of my teachers, but the one who was very close to me and is still in contact with me is my mentoring teacher.

'Anointing teacher' is likely incorrect word choice; 'mentoring teacher' or 'mentor' fits context. Use 'who' for people instead of 'that'. Add a comma before 'but'. Suggestion: Use 'who' for people and choose correct noun like 'mentor'.

× She was very approachable and a very humble person.

✓ She was very approachable and very humble.

Both forms are acceptable, but removing the second 'a' makes the sentence more natural and concise. Parallel adjectives without repeating 'a' read better. Suggestion: Use parallel adjective structure: 'very approachable and very humble'.

× Whenever I needed support she used to help me one-on-one.

✓ Whenever I needed support, she helped me one-on-one.

'Used to help' indicates habitual past and is acceptable, but combining with 'whenever I needed' the simple past 'helped' is clearer. Also add a comma after the introductory clause. Suggestion: Use consistent past tense: 'she helped me'.

× She always appreciate me for my hard work and keep me motivated.

✓ She always appreciated me for my hard work and kept me motivated.

Subject-verb agreement and tense: 'She always appreciate' should be 'appreciated' to match past narration; 'keep' should be 'kept'. Use past tense consistently because describing past actions. Suggestion: Keep verbs in past when describing past events.

× No, I am not in touch with any teacher from my school as it's been years and, uh, moreover, our teachers in school were dozen, may maintain any personal relationships.

✓ No, I am not in touch with any teachers from my school as it has been years. Moreover, our school had many teachers and they did not maintain personal relationships with us.

Multiple issues: 'it's been years' should be 'it has been years' or 'it's been many years' and split into two sentences. 'Teachers... were dozen' is ungrammatical; use 'had many teachers' or 'there were dozens of teachers'. 'May maintain' is wrong—use 'did not maintain'. Suggestion: Use clear sentence splits and correct quantifier expressions like 'many' or 'dozens of'.

× So they were only a teacher to me and, uh, they were not so supportive that I maintained.

✓ So they were just my teachers, and they were not supportive enough for me to maintain a relationship with them.

'Only a teacher to me' should be 'just my teachers'. 'Not so supportive that I maintained' is ungrammatical; rephrase to 'not supportive enough for me to maintain a relationship'. Suggestion: Use 'supportive enough' and clearly state what was not maintained.

× As I already mentioned, my favorite teacher was my anatomy teacher.

✓ As I mentioned, my favorite teacher was my anatomy teacher.

'As I already mentioned' is acceptable but 'As I mentioned' is more concise. Sentence is otherwise correct. Suggestion: Prefer concise phrasing in spoken responses.

× She uh, not only helped me with the not me subject, but also helped me with other subjects too.

✓ She not only helped me with that subject, but also helped me with other subjects.

Original has multiple errors: 'not me subject' is unclear — likely 'that subject'. Remove filler 'uh' and redundant 'too'. Use parallel structure 'not only... but also...'. Suggestion: Use 'that subject' and maintain parallel construction.

× Whenever I was in trouble or whenever, uh, there was a difficult topic that I was not able to understand, she used to give me one-on-one assistance and keep me motivated throughout my studies.

✓ Whenever I was in trouble or faced a difficult topic I could not understand, she gave me one-on-one assistance and kept me motivated throughout my studies.

Remove filler 'uh' and simplify redundancy. Use consistent past tense ('gave' and 'kept') and concise phrasing ('faced a difficult topic' or 'when there was a difficult topic'). Suggestion: Keep tense consistent and remove unnecessary repetitions.