视图— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more concise and correct minor grammatical errors. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one specific supporting detail using a linking word. Avoid repeating words like "environment" and "surroundings."

示例: Yes, I enjoy photographing different views, especially when I travel. For example, when I visited the coast last year, the contrast between the blue sea and the colourful houses made great photos, so I spent hours capturing different angles.

建议: Improve clarity and grammar, remove fillers, and organize the answer with a topic sentence plus a specific reason and an example. Use linking words like "because" or "for example."

示例: I prefer urban views because I enjoy the lively atmosphere and the variety of scenes. For example, busy streets with cafés and street art often create interesting photo opportunities where everyday life and architecture combine.

建议: Avoid vague or negative generalizations about your country and remove hesitations. Give a clear, respectful reason and a specific example or contrast. Use linking words such as "because" and "for example."

示例: I usually prefer views in other countries because they offer different landscapes and climates. For example, when I travelled to Japan I enjoyed the distinct four seasons and varied scenery, which felt quite different from the landscapes back home.

× Yes, I do enjoy taking pictures of different views, especially during traveling where the environment and their surroundings and the overall view is very different from my hometown.

✓ Yes, I do enjoy taking pictures of different views, especially when traveling, because the environment, the surroundings, and the overall view are very different from my hometown.

Error type: incorrect use of '-ing' form and related phrasing. 'During traveling' is not idiomatic; use 'when traveling' or 'while traveling'. 'Their surroundings' is incorrect because there is no clear plural possessive antecedent — use 'the surroundings'. Also subject-verb agreement: 'the environment, the surroundings, and the overall view' is a compound subject and should take the plural verb 'are' not 'is'. Suggestion: use 'when traveling' and ensure noun phrases are parallel and verb agrees with compound subject.

× I prefer the views in urban areas personally cause because I like the atmosphere where you can see everybody having their own lives yet it's a very busy St. and personally I think you can see the beauty in the midst of.

✓ I prefer the views in urban areas personally because I like the atmosphere where you can see everybody living their own lives even though it's a very busy street, and I think you can see beauty in the midst of it.

Errors: redundant conjunctions ('cause because'), informal/incorrect abbreviation ('St.'), awkward phrase 'having their own lives', missing object 'it' after 'in the midst of'. Use 'because' once. Replace 'having their own lives' with 'living their own lives'. Use 'street' instead of 'St.' in speech. Add 'it' to complete 'in the midst of it'. Also maintain parallel structure and avoid repeating 'personally' twice.

× I prefer the views in other countries, definitely. This is because I think that my country is very umm, is very much a developing country, so we have a lot to work on and other countries have more seasons.

✓ I prefer the views in other countries, definitely. This is because I think that my country is a developing country, so we have a lot to work on, and other countries have more distinct seasons.

Errors: redundant 'is very umm, is very much a developing country' — repetition and filler words; use simple present 'is a developing country'. 'More seasons' is vague; say 'more distinct seasons' or 'a greater variety of seasons'. Suggestion: remove fillers and repetitions, keep present tense simple and concise, and clarify comparative phrase.