旅行— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more accurate and natural with vocabulary and sentence structure. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details, and use linking words. Correct word choices: 'scenery' not 'sensory'; say 'I enjoy nature' or 'I like looking at the scenery'. Keep responses to a maximum of about 3–4 sentences to avoid repetition.

示例: Yes, I usually look out of the window when I travel by car because I find it relaxing. For example, I enjoy watching trees and villages pass by, and I often notice small details like people working in their fields. Because the journey is comfortable, I often spend most of the time looking outside.

建议: Make your answer concise and use clearer linking words to explain reasons. Correct vocabulary and reduce repetition. Provide one clear reason and one specific example to support it. Avoid filler words and repeated phrases.

示例: Yes, I often take photos from the car window because I want to remember interesting views. For instance, last month I photographed a range of mountains and a row of colourful houses that I had never seen before, which made the trip memorable.

建议: Answer directly with a clear statement of preference, then give specific reasons with correct vocabulary. Avoid unclear fragments (e.g., '****', 'CNC'). Use linking words like 'because' and give concrete details (activities, feelings). Keep it to two or three sentences.

示例: I prefer the sea because I enjoy swimming and relaxing on the beach. It feels peaceful to listen to the waves, and I like walking along the shore at sunset, which helps me unwind after a busy week.

× Yes, I look out the window at the sensory when I travel in a car because it's very comfortable for me and I think I like to nature so I look around the window.

✓ Yes, I look out the window at the scenery when I travel by car because it's very comfortable for me and I like nature, so I look out of the window.

The student used 'sensory' instead of the noun 'scenery' (word choice error). 'Travel in a car' is grammatically acceptable but 'travel by car' is the more natural prepositional choice (preposition usage). 'I think I like to nature' is ungrammatical: 'like' should directly take the noun 'nature' without 'to'. Also 'look around the window' is unnatural; use 'look out of the window' or 'look out the window'. Suggestion: replace 'sensory' with 'scenery', use 'by car', remove the extra 'to' before 'nature', and use 'look out of the window' for clarity.

× Yes, I take photos of this sensory outside the car window because sometimes I can so I I can see beautiful mountains, beautiful vehicles, beautiful places and I take a picture for I want to remember that.

✓ Yes, I take photos of the scenery outside the car window because sometimes I can see beautiful mountains, vehicles and places, and I take pictures because I want to remember them.

Again 'sensory' should be 'scenery' (wrong word). The sentence has redundancy and awkward phrasing: 'because sometimes I can so I I can see' is ungrammatical and contains repetition. Use 'I can see' once. 'Beautiful vehicles, beautiful places' can be simplified to 'vehicles and places'. 'I take a picture for I want to remember that' is incorrect; use 'I take pictures because I want to remember them.' Suggestion: correct word choice, remove repeated words, combine similar items, and use 'because' + clause properly.

× I take a picture for I want to remember that.

✓ I take pictures because I want to remember them.

The original uses singular 'a picture' and an awkward connector 'for I want to', which is not the natural way to express purpose in spoken English. 'Because I want to remember them' correctly expresses reason and agrees in number with 'pictures'. Suggestion: use 'pictures' if more than one and use 'because' to introduce the reason.

× I like to the see because I can swim in and I can **** in.

✓ I prefer the sea because I can swim there and I can relax in it.

The student wrote 'I like to the see' which has incorrect word order and unnecessary articles; correct phrase is 'I like the sea' or 'I prefer the sea'. 'Swim in' requires an object or adverb of place: use 'swim there' or 'swim in the sea'. 'I can **** in' is unclear; assuming intended meaning 'relax in it' or similar. Suggestion: choose clear verb for the second activity (relax, dive, surf) and include the object 'the sea' or 'there'.

× The CNC is very beautiful and it's very peaceful for me.

✓ The sea is very beautiful and it's very peaceful for me.

'CNC' appears to be a typo; context implies 'sea'. This is a word choice/typo error. Also 'peaceful for me' is understandable but more natural is 'peaceful' or 'peaceful for me' is acceptable; could also say 'it's very peaceful'. Suggestion: correct the typo to 'sea' and use simple phrasing 'it's very peaceful'.