Gifts— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be more fluent and concise. Begin with a clear topic sentence, avoid filler words (e.g., "uh"), correct grammar (use consistent tense and word order), and limit to under five sentences. Add one specific brief example or method you use. Use linking words to show sequence (e.g., "First,") if needed.

Exemplo: Yes, I think I'm good at giving gifts. I usually research the person’s preferences beforehand and think about what they need. For example, for my friend who loves cooking I bought a high-quality pan last month, which she appreciated.

Sugestão: Start with a full topic sentence and improve grammar (use plural/singular and articles). Combine sentences to avoid choppiness and add a linking phrase ("for example"). Keep it concise and provide one clear specific example with brief reason.

Exemplo: I usually give gifts on special occasions such as New Year’s Eve, birthdays, or national holidays. For example, I recently gave my brother a watch because he needed a reliable timepiece for work.

Sugestão: Good content and a specific example. Improve grammar (use possessive/plural forms and remove redundant phrases). Use linking words like "first" or "in addition" if listing points. Make sentences smoother and avoid contradictions ("what do they actually want" should be "what they actually want").

Exemplo: I consider the person’s needs and preferences first. For example, my sister always wanted a necklace but couldn't afford one, so I bought her a simple silver necklace that suited her style.

Sugestão: Clarify and correct the story. Avoid repetition and fix word order errors ("I bought a handmade necklace once for my sister"). Combine sentences and use linking words like "however" properly. Ensure each sentence is complete and under five sentences.

Exemplo: No, I'm not good at making handmade gifts. However, I once bought a handmade necklace for my sister, and she was very happy because it was well made and unique.

Sugestão: Express a balanced opinion and improve grammar and phrasing ("more important" → "important" and "by spending more resources on a gift"). You can mention an alternative view to show depth, but keep it concise. Use linking words such as "for example" and "however" correctly.

Exemplo: I think expensive gifts can show strong appreciation because they often reflect thought and effort. For example, a friend once bought me a pair of shoes I wanted but couldn't afford. However, I also believe a thoughtful, inexpensive gift can be just as meaningful.

× I believe that, uh, I'm good at giving gifts, especially to those who I care because before the special events I research their preferences and what do they actually need and then give it to them.

✓ I believe that, uh, I'm good at giving gifts, especially to those I care about, because before special events I research their preferences and what they actually need and then give it to them.

The phrase 'those who I care' is incorrect; the correct structure is 'those I care about' (preposition 'about' is required with 'care'). Also avoid subject-auxiliary inversion in embedded questions: 'what do they actually need' should be 'what they actually need' when used as a noun clause. These changes fix incorrect pronoun/preposition use and clause structure. Suggestion: use 'care about' and use declarative word order in subordinate clauses.

× Usually this special occasions such as New Year's Eve, birthdays or National days.

✓ Usually on special occasions such as New Year's Eve, birthdays, or national days.

The original lacks the preposition 'on' and misuses 'this' with a plural noun; use 'special occasions' with 'on' and no demonstrative or use 'these special occasions'. 'National days' should be lowercased unless a specific holiday name. Fixes include correct preposition and agreement between demonstrative and plural noun.

× For example, the most recent present that I gave was to my brother. I gave him a watch.

✓ For example, the most recent present I gave was a watch I gave to my brother.

The two short sentences are repetitive and awkward. Combining them into one clear sentence improves flow: 'the most recent present I gave was a watch I gave to my brother' or simpler 'the most recent present I gave my brother was a watch.' Also avoid unnecessary 'was to' when direct object forms are natural.

× Usually I look at individuals needs, their preferences and what do they actually want.

✓ Usually I look at individuals' needs, their preferences, and what they actually want.

Possessive apostrophe is missing in 'individuals needs' (should be 'individuals' needs'). Also again remove auxiliary inversion in embedded clause: 'what do they actually want' should be 'what they actually want.' These corrections address pronoun/possessive and subordinate clause word order.

× For example, for my sister, I bought a necklace because she always wanted to have one, but unfortunately she didn't have enough resources for that purchase.

✓ For example, I bought a necklace for my sister because she had always wanted one, but unfortunately she didn't have enough money for that purchase.

Mixing past simple and present perfect is acceptable but 'always wanted to have one' is awkward; 'had always wanted one' clarifies past desire before the purchase. 'Resources' is a formal and odd choice here; 'money' is more natural. These changes improve tense clarity and word choice.

× No, unfortunately I'm bad at creating handmade gifts. However, I bought once hand my necklace for my sister.

✓ No, unfortunately I'm bad at making handmade gifts. However, I once bought a handmade necklace for my sister.

Use 'making' rather than 'creating' for handmade items and 'handmade' as adjective. Word order in 'I bought once hand my necklace' is incorrect; correct order is 'I once bought a handmade necklace.' This fixes verb + -ing usage and pronoun/phrase order.

× She was really happy about that and the necklace itself was really good quality. Had really good quality.

✓ She was really happy about it, and the necklace itself was of really good quality.

The fragment 'Had really good quality.' is a sentence without a subject and verb. Combine clauses and use 'of really good quality' to form a grammatical sentence. This corrects the sentence fragment and improves cohesion.

× Do expensive gifts better express your feelings?

✓ Do expensive gifts better express your feelings?

This sentence is acceptable as a question. However, later student response contains errors; no change needed here. (Included for completeness; no correction applied.)

× In my opinion, yes, because that way we can show how the person important to us by spending more resources to a gift.

✓ In my opinion, yes, because that way we can show how important the person is to us by spending more on a gift.

The original misorders the adjective and subject: 'how the person important to us' should be 'how important the person is to us.' Also 'spending more resources to a gift' uses incorrect preposition and awkward noun; use 'spending more on a gift.' These changes fix subject-verb order and preposition choice.

× For example, my friend once bought me a pair of shoes that I've always wanted but wasn't able to buy.

✓ For example, my friend once bought me a pair of shoes that I had always wanted but wasn't able to buy myself.

Maintain consistent past reference: 'I've always wanted' (present perfect) is less consistent with the past context; 'I had always wanted' fits better. Also add 'myself' to clarify the subject who couldn't buy them. These changes improve tense consistency and clarity.