Bike— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be more concise and fluent. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid filler words (uh), and use linking words to add one or two specific supporting details. Correct grammar (e.g., “brought my sister and me a bike,” “taught my sister to ride”). Keep it within 3–4 sentences.

Exemplo: Yes, I did. My mother bought a bike for my sister and me when I was about eight, and we were thrilled. We spent many afternoons practising in the park, and I remember teaching my sister how to balance and pedal. Those times helped us become confident cyclists.

Sugestão: Give a direct opinion first, then support it with two specific reasons using clear linking words. Avoid repetition and filler words. Use correct collocations (e.g., “public transport is crowded”) and organize ideas logically (contrast bikes with other transport). Keep to 2–3 sentences.

Exemplo: Yes, bikes are fairly popular in my country. Although many people use motorcycles and cars, bicycles are common in cities because they are cheaper and easier to park, especially when public transport is crowded. As a result, many commuters choose cycling for short trips.

× I remember when I was a child my mother uh brought me and my sister a bike and we were so happy because we spent a lot of time there together and we talked my sister how to ride the bike so.

✓ I remember that when I was a child my mother bought my sister and me a bike, and we were so happy because we spent a lot of time together, and I taught my sister how to ride it.

The original sentence has multiple sentence structure problems: incorrect word order, wrong verb choice, and unclear pronoun use. 'brought me and my sister a bike' is grammatically possible but 'bought my sister and me a bike' is more natural for ownership; use 'my sister and me' as the object. 'we talked my sister how to ride the bike' is incorrect; the correct verb is 'teach' in past tense ('taught'), and the subject performing the action should be 'I taught my sister how to ride it.' Also remove filler 'uh' and redundant 'so' at the end. Improve clarity by splitting into two coordinated clauses and using commas. Suggestions: replace 'brought' with 'bought' if purchase is intended, use object order 'my sister and me', change 'we talked my sister how to ride' to 'I taught my sister how to ride it', and break into shorter clauses to improve flow.

× Yes, yes, that is that is so popular in my country because we have different uh, ways to transport, for example, motorcycle, bicycles, metros that and we have a lot of cars and the trans the public transport is a little bit busy.

✓ Yes, yes, bicycles are very popular in my country because we have different means of transport, for example motorcycles, bicycles, and the metro, and we have a lot of cars, so public transport is a little bit crowded.

The original sentence misuses prepositions and articles and has awkward phrasing. 'ways to transport' should be 'means of transport'. Items in a list need correct plural forms and articles: use 'motorcycles' and 'the metro'. 'the trans the public transport' is garbled; replace with 'so public transport is a little bit crowded.' Also use 'crowded' rather than 'busy' for public transport. Suggestions: use 'means of transport', ensure parallel plural nouns, include 'the' for 'metro', and streamline the sentence into clear clauses.