Parks— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Focus on clear tense consistency and sentence structure. Start with a direct topic sentence, use past tense consistently for childhood, avoid repetition and grammatical errors, and keep it within 3–4 well-linked sentences. Add one specific detail (a memory or activity) and connect ideas with linking words (e.g., “because,” “so,” “for example”).

Exemplo: Yes, I loved going to parks when I was a child. I often went with my parents because it was a good way to spend free time together. For example, we used to play on the playground and ride bikes around the paths, which I enjoyed a lot.

Sugestão: Use correct verb forms and make sentences more natural and concise. Begin with a clear topic sentence, then give a reason and a specific habit as an example. Use linking words like “because” and “for example” and avoid minor grammatical mistakes (e.g., “I really go to the park now”).

Exemplo: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks. I go regularly because parks help me reduce stress and refresh my mind. For example, there is a large park near my apartment where I take a walk after dinner almost every evening.

Sugestão: Be careful with countable/uncountable nouns and sentence coherence. Start with a direct statement, give two clear reasons using linking words (“because,” “for example”), and provide one specific benefit or comparison. Avoid vague phrasing like “the more entertainment will get.”

Exemplo: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because we need more public spaces for both children and adults. For example, new parks would provide safe places for exercise and sports, and they would improve community life by offering more opportunities for outdoor activities.

Sugestão: Improve vocabulary and grammar when talking about future plans. Use a clear topic sentence about your wish, explain why with specific reasons, and use correct verb forms and collocations (e.g., “touch nature” → “be close to nature”; “feel peaceful and dry” unclear — revise to “feel peaceful and relaxed”). Limit to 2–3 supporting sentences with linking words like “because” or “so.”

Exemplo: Yes, I would like to visit a national park in the future because I enjoy being close to nature. For example, hiking in a national park would help me feel peaceful and relaxed, and I could learn more about natural environments.

× Well actually I do like going to parks.

✓ Well, actually I liked going to parks.

The question asked about childhood (past). The student uses present tense 'do like' which mismatches timeframe. Change to simple past 'liked' to match 'as a child'. Use a comma after 'Well' for natural flow.

× When I was a child at that time I always went to park with my parents to enjoy the spare time when when we was in parks we always play in the ground and rose bike around the parks together.

✓ When I was a child, I always went to the park with my parents to enjoy our free time. When we were in the park, we always played on the ground and rode bikes around the park together.

Multiple past-tense errors and article use: 'at that time' is redundant with 'When I was a child'; use 'the park' as singular countable noun with article. Use past tense forms 'were' (not 'was' for 'we'), 'played' (past, not 'play'), and 'rode' (past of 'ride', not 'rose'). Use 'free time' instead of 'spare time' for natural phrasing. Also correct plural/singular consistency and punctuation.

× We so love it.

✓ We loved it very much.

This sentence mixes present tense 'love' with past context and awkward adverb placement. Use past tense 'loved' and place 'very much' after verb for natural English.

× Yes absolutely. I really going to park now because I think park is a good place we can reduce the stress and refresh my mind.

✓ Yes, absolutely. I really go to the park now because I think the park is a good place where we can reduce stress and refresh our minds.

Missing verb form: 'really going' is incorrect; use simple present 'go' for habitual action. Use articles 'the park' for a specific park mentioned later. 'We can reduce the stress' should be 'reduce stress' or 'reduce the stress' with context; 'refresh my mind' should be 'refresh our minds' to match 'we' or keep 'refresh my mind' if staying first person singular; here changed to plural for consistency. Add 'where' to link clauses.

× There is a big park near my apartment, I always have a walk there after dinner.

✓ There is a big park near my apartment. I always take a walk there after dinner.

Comma splice joins two independent clauses; split into two sentences. Use the common collocation 'take a walk' instead of 'have a walk'.

× Yes, I would like to see more park in my city because I think my city need a lot of public space for children and adult.

✓ Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because I think my city needs a lot of public space for children and adults.

Countable noun 'park' needs plural 'parks' after 'more'. Subject-verb agreement: 'city need' should be 'city needs'. 'Adult' should be plural 'adults' to match 'children'.

× It can offer a good place to do exercise and do sports and the more space have built the more entertainment will get.

✓ They can offer good places to exercise and play sports, and the more space that is built, the more entertainment there will be.

Pronoun and agreement: 'It' should be 'They' referring to parks (plural). Use 'places' plural. 'Do exercise' is better as 'exercise'; 'do sports' as 'play sports'. The second clause is ungrammatical; change to a comparative structure 'the more space that is built, the more entertainment there will be.'

× Yes, I really want to go to some National Park because I like touch nature and touch nature can make me feel peaceful and dry.

✓ Yes, I really want to visit some national parks because I like to touch nature, and being in nature makes me feel peaceful and refreshed.

Use 'visit' or 'go to' with 'national parks' plural. Verb forms: 'like touch nature' should be 'like to touch nature' or 'like touching nature'; more natural is 'being in nature' or 'touching nature'. 'Dry' is inappropriate; likely intended 'relaxed' or 'refreshed'.

× I want to studying natural environments.

✓ I want to study natural environments.

After 'want to' use the base verb, not the -ing form. 'Want to study' is correct. Also 'natural environments' is fine plural or could be 'the natural environment' depending on meaning.