Parks— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be concise, correct grammar and use a clear topic sentence. Use past tense consistently, reduce repetition, and add one or two specific details. Link ideas with simple connectors.

Exemplo: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. I often played football and climbed trees with neighbours, and the large grassy areas and shady trees made it a safe and fun place to spend the afternoon.

Sugestão: Use correct verb forms and fewer repetitions. Start with a direct topic sentence, then give one or two specific reasons and link them logically (e.g., because, so).

Exemplo: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks regularly. When I feel stressed, I go for a slow walk and breathe fresh air because the quiet paths and greenery help me relax and clear my mind.

Sugestão: Avoid fillers (uh) and complete your sentences. Give a clear opinion, then support it with specific benefits and one example. Use future or modal correctly.

Exemplo: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because they improve air quality and provide recreational space. For example, adding a small park near my neighbourhood would give families a place to exercise and children a safe area to play.

Sugestão: Be precise: Disneyland is a theme park, so name it correctly and avoid hesitations. State your plan, give a specific detail about why you want to go, and use correct tense and linking words.

Exemplo: Yes, I would like to visit Hong Kong Disneyland with my friends. We plan to watch the nightly fireworks because the show looks spectacular and sharing that experience would create lasting memories.

× I enjoy going to pass when I was a child.

✓ I enjoyed going to parks when I was a child.

The student used present tense 'enjoy' and incorrect noun 'pass'. The action refers to childhood, so past tense 'enjoyed' is appropriate; 'parks' is the correct noun. Suggestion: use past tense for past habits and check word choice ('parks').

× I remember when I was a kid, I always play with my friends in a park where I can meet a lot of friends and when I was playing and there were a lot of greenery, which helps me to enjoy the environments.

✓ I remember that when I was a kid, I always played with my friends in a park where I could meet many people, and there was a lot of greenery, which helped me enjoy the environment.

Multiple tense mismatches: present 'play', 'can', 'helps' should be past to match 'when I was a kid'. Use 'played', 'could', 'helped'. 'A lot of greenery' requires singular verb 'was' and 'environments' is better singular 'environment'. Also 'a lot of friends' redundant with 'friends' - 'many people' or 'friends'. Suggestion: keep past tense consistent and simplify phrasing.

× I still often going to parks when I feel stressed or tired so I can unwind all the stress and pressure.

✓ I still often go to parks when I feel stressed or tired so I can unwind and relieve the pressure.

Incorrect verb form 'going' after adverb; correct is base form 'go' for present habitual actions. Redundant phrase 'unwind all the stress and pressure' improved to 'unwind and relieve the pressure'. Suggestion: use 'often go' for habits and avoid redundancy.

× I'm going to parks and breathing some fresh air and just take a slow and relaxing walk which helps me to forget.

✓ I go to parks, breathe fresh air, and take a slow, relaxing walk, which helps me forget my worries.

Mixed present continuous 'I'm going' with gerunds; for habitual activity use simple present 'go', 'breathe', 'take'. 'Breathing some fresh air' better as 'breathe fresh air'. 'Helps me to forget' is vague; specify 'forget my worries'. Suggestion: use parallel verbs in simple present for routines and clarify object.

× I love to see more parks in my city in the future because, uh, it helps to, uh, have a better environmental impact on our city.

✓ I would like to see more parks in my city in the future because they would have a positive environmental impact on our city.

'I love to see' is awkward for future preference; 'would like' is appropriate. Tense and agreement: 'it helps to have' should match plural 'parks' so use 'they would have'. Suggestion: use 'would like' for future desires and ensure subject-verb agreement.

× There'll be more greenery that being built in my area so I can breathe more fresh air and I.

✓ There will be more greenery built in my area so I can breathe fresher air.

Incorrect structure 'that being built' is ungrammatical; use passive simple future 'more greenery built' or 'that will be built'. Sentence fragment ending with 'and I' incomplete; removed. 'More fresh air' -> 'fresher air' is more natural. Suggestion: use complete clauses and correct passive/future forms.

× Uh, I wish to go to Hong Kong Disneyland with my friends.

✓ I would like to go to Hong Kong Disneyland with my friends.

'I wish to' is not wrong but sounds formal/odd in spoken English; 'I would like to' is more natural for expressing desire. Suggestion: use 'would like' in conversational contexts.

× In the future, we hope to enjoy this spectacular fireworks at nights and which uh, I think would be a memory that we will treasure because, uh, it is beautiful.

✓ In the future, we hope to enjoy the spectacular fireworks at night, which I think will be a memory we will treasure because they are beautiful.

Several issues: 'this spectacular fireworks' should be 'the spectacular fireworks' (article and number). 'At nights' incorrect plural/time expression; use 'at night' or 'in the evenings'. Combine clauses: remove extra 'and which'. Use future 'will be' for expected memory and plural agreement 'they are beautiful'. Suggestion: correct article and time expression, simplify clause linking, and match plural agreement.