History— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition ("taught teaching us"), and give one specific detail about what interested you. Use linking words if adding a detail.

예시: Yes. I studied history in secondary school, where we learned about Singapore’s path to independence. I was particularly interested in the stories of the leaders and how they negotiated self-government, because those stories showed me how political change happens.

제안: Provide a clearer structure and a specific example. Start with a direct statement, then explain why and give an example or platform. Avoid vague phrases like "a lot of people" and repetitive words such as "backstories of the histories."

예시: I usually learn history through social media because short videos and infographics make complex events easy to follow. For example, I follow a YouTube channel that explains colonial-era events with maps and primary-source images, which helps me remember dates and causes better.

제안: Make your main point clear and support it with a specific reason and example. Remove filler words ("umm") and incorrect phrases ("last generation"). Use linking words like "because" or "so" to connect ideas.

예시: Learning history helps people understand how past actions shaped the present because it reveals causes and consequences. For example, studying economic crises of the past can make policymakers and citizens more cautious about repeating the same financial mistakes.

제안: Give a clear, grammatically correct reply with one or two specific reasons. Correct errors ("learning is 3", "nor mark", "after the future") and remove fillers. Use linking words such as "not only... but also" correctly, and illustrate with a concrete example.

예시: Yes, I believe learning history is very important because it helps people learn from past mistakes and understand how current institutions developed. For instance, knowing the history of public health responses can guide better decisions during a new epidemic.

× I did study history back when I was in secondary school.

✓ I studied history back when I was in secondary school.

Using 'did study' is unnecessary for a simple past statement and sounds like emphatic form; use the simple past 'studied' to state a past fact.

× I remember our teachers taught teaching us the history of Singapore and how their independence started, and I remember being very interested in it.

✓ I remember our teachers taught us the history of Singapore and how its independence began, and I was very interested in it.

Remove the redundant gerund 'teaching' after 'taught'. Use the object pronoun 'us' with 'taught'. Use 'its' to refer to Singapore (possessive adjective), not 'their'. Use 'began' for a simple past action. Replace 'I remember being very interested' with 'I was very interested' for clarity and natural past narration.

× I typically learn history through social media.

✓ I typically learn about history through social media.

Add the preposition 'about' to collocate naturally with 'learn' when referring to a subject area: 'learn about history'.

× I think social media teaches us a lot of stories behind the history and nowadays a lot of people explain these backstories of the histories.

✓ I think social media teaches us many stories behind history, and nowadays many people explain these backstories.

Use 'many' with countable 'stories' rather than 'a lot of' for cleaner phrasing. 'Behind history' is sufficient; avoid 'the histories' here. 'Backstories' already implies stories, so ending with 'of the histories' is redundant.

× I think learning history not only helps people know about the past, it also umm engages them in what happened in the past about their last generation and also want to be wary about in the future.

✓ I think learning history not only helps people know about the past, but it also engages them with what happened to previous generations and makes them more cautious about the future.

Parallel structure required after 'not only... but'. Use 'but it also' and keep verbs parallel: 'helps' vs 'engages' and add 'makes them' for 'want to be wary' which is ungrammatical. Use 'previous generations' instead of 'their last generation', and 'more cautious about the future' is a natural expression.

× I think learning is 3 is very important.

✓ I think learning history is very important.

'Learning is 3' is unclear and ungrammatical—likely a transcription error. Restore intended meaning 'learning history'. Ensure subject and complement form a clear noun phrase.

× Not only can kids or like people nor mark their past, but also umm learn from their mistake and just know how the present is developed after the future.

✓ Not only can kids and other people learn about their past, but they can also learn from their mistakes and understand how the present developed from the past.

Replace awkward 'or like people nor mark' with 'and other people'. Use 'learn about' with 'past'. Change singular 'mistake' to plural 'mistakes'. 'Know how the present is developed after the future' is nonsensical—clarify to 'understand how the present developed from the past' to match logical temporal relationship. Maintain parallel verb forms after 'not only... but also'.