Websites— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: 回答が意図は伝わりますが、発音や文法の誤り、冗長な表現、不自然な単語選択が見られます。まず主題文を明確にして簡潔に述べ、その後に具体的な理由を1〜2文で続けてください。接続語（for example, because, so）を使って論理を示し、語彙は“official website”“reliable information”“company updates”などの自然な表現を使いましょう。発音が不明瞭な箇所はゆっくりはっきり話す練習をしてください。

예시: I often visit company official websites. I use them because they provide reliable and up-to-date information about products and corporate news, so I can stay informed about my industry.

제안: 内容が少し混乱しています。まず好きなサイトを明確に述べ、次に“何が良いのか”を具体的に一つか二つ挙げてください。語彙の誤用（例: 'Bergen's health'）に注意して、'special offers','discounts','promotions','product information'など具体的で自然な語句を使いましょう。短く簡潔に話す練習をして冗長さを減らしてください。

예시: My favourite website is my local supermarket’s homepage. It is useful because it lists current discounts and special promotions, and I can check product availability before I go shopping.

제안: 意味が伝わりにくく、文法や語順の誤りが多いです。質問には“変化”について答えるので、まず『はい／いいえ』を言い、具体的な変化を一つ示してください（例: more ads, personalization）。接続詞（Recently, For example）を使い、理由や影響を短く説明しましょう。

예시: Yes, I have noticed changes recently. For example, many sites now show more advertisements and personalized promotions, which can be annoying because they interrupt the content and slow down loading times.

제안: 内容があいまいで語順や語彙の誤りが多いです。まず一般的な傾向を述べ（e.g. streaming sites, news, social media）、次に理由や具体例を1文で補足してください。'actor and actress relationships'のような言い方は不自然なので、'behind-the-scenes information'や'celebrity news'のように言い換えましょう。

예시: Streaming and entertainment websites are very popular in my country. People use them to watch drama and comedy shows and to read behind-the-scenes news about actors and celebrities.

제안: 主張は明確ですが、語彙の繰り返し（'quickness'）や誤った単語（'obtaination'）が目立ちます。比較の際は'relier on','faster than books'など自然な表現を使い、理由を1〜2つに絞って具体例（breaking news, live updates）を挙げてください。接続語（because, for example）を入れて流れを良くしましょう。

예시: I prefer getting information from websites because they are faster than books. For example, during breaking news or emergencies I can get live updates online much sooner than any printed source.

제안: 回答は自然で内容も分かりやすいですが、少し冗長です。最初に明確に『はい、持っています』と言い、その後にサイトの目的や具体的な機能（blog posts, comments）を短く説明すると良いです。語彙は'express my opinions','visitors','public forum'など自然でOK。

예시: Yes, I already have one. I use my website to share my opinions and personal stories, and it also serves as a public forum where visitors can leave comments and discuss topics.

제안: 良いポイントを述べていますが、文法（主語と動詞の一致）や語順の誤りがあります。まず学んだことを一文でまとめ、その後に具体例（online courses, expert advice, tutorials）を挙げてください。接続語（for example, such as）を使うと論理的になります。

예시: Websites have taught me many practical skills that I couldn't learn at school, such as coding tutorials and study tips. For example, I follow experts on social media who share advice and answer questions about my field.

× I often visit the company's official site almost every day.

✓ I often visit the company's official site almost every day.

The sentence is acceptable but 'the company's official site' is correct if referring to a specific company. No change required. Keep article 'the'.

× I'd say from my professional perspective, companies official website provides indeed and 1st information and and authentic information so through that I can obtain a journey.

✓ I'd say from my professional perspective, a company's official website provides accurate and authentic information, so through that I can obtain an overview.

元の文は複数形と所有格、冠詞、省略語や語順の誤りが混在しています。'companies official website'は'company's official website'または'a company's official website'とする必要があります。また 'indeed and 1st information' は不自然で意味不明のため、'accurate and authentic information'と修正しました。最後の 'obtain a journey' は英語では不自然なので 'obtain an overview' に変更しました。改善のために: 所有格の's'や冠詞を確認し、形容詞の順序と語彙の適切さを見直してください。

× My favorite website is supermarket's home page which provides the information of Bergen's health or discount and campaign saying that I can get the information.

✓ My favorite website is the supermarket's homepage, which provides information about Bergen's health, discounts, and campaigns, so I can get the information I need.

'supermarket's home page'は特定の店舗か一般的なサイトか不明だが通常 'the supermarket's homepage' または 'a supermarket's homepage' と冠詞が必要です。'the information of Bergen's health or discount and campaign' は前置詞と名詞の複数形が間違っているため 'information about Bergen's health, discounts, and campaigns' とし、文末の構造を整えました。改善のために: 前置詞（about, of）の使い方と名詞の複数形、コンマでの列挙を意識してください。

× Recently, there are many advertisements or appears in those websites to ensure the guarantee or money to some extent, companies often try to. Send an advertisement in the.

✓ Recently, many advertisements have appeared on those websites; companies often try to guarantee money or send advertisements to some extent.

元の文は語順の乱れと不要な句点があり、'there are many advertisements or appears' は文法的に誤りです。'appear' の適切な形は 'have appeared'（現在完了）や 'appear'（現在）です。また 'on those websites' が適切な前置詞です。最後の部分は断片になっていたため一文にまとめました。改善のために: 主語と動詞の一致、句読点、前置詞を確認してください。

× Independent website hub The drama and comedy such as TV program are very very cool.

✓ Independent websites and hubs for drama and comedy, such as TV programs, are very popular.

元は名詞句の構造が不明瞭で 'The drama and comedy such as TV program are very very cool' は複合名詞の扱いが不自然です。'very very cool' は口語的でテストでは 'very popular' のほうが適切です。複数形や冠詞も修正しました。改善のために: 名詞句を明確にし、フォーマルな語彙を選んでください。

× People often visit their visit data and obtain information about relationship of actor and the actress or the broad.

✓ People often visit these sites to get data and obtain information about relationships between actors and actresses or about broadcasts.

'their visit data' は曖昧で不適切な代名詞の使い方です。'relationship of actor and the actress' は冠詞と前置詞が誤りで、'relationships between actors and actresses' のように複数形と前置詞を使うべきです。'the broad' は誤用で 'broadcasts' に修正しました。改善のために: 代名詞の参照が明確か、前置詞や複数形を正しく使っているか確認してください。

× I would just say I'd rather prefer obtaining information from the websites.

✓ I would say I'd rather obtain information from websites.

'I'd rather prefer' は冗長で誤用です。'would rather' の後には動詞の原形が続くため 'obtain' を使います。また 'the websites' より一般的には 'websites' とします。改善のために: 'would rather' の構造（would rather + base verb）を覚えてください。

× Websites are far superior to books in the point of quickness and quickness when it comes to some accidents occur.

✓ Websites are far superior to books in terms of speed when accidents occur.

'in the point of quickness and quickness' は重複と不自然な表現です。英語では 'in terms of speed' や 'in terms of quickness' を使います。'when it comes to some accidents occur' は文法的に誤りで 'when accidents occur' と短縮できます。改善のために: 冗長表現を避け、自然な句（in terms of + noun）を使用してください。

× We can obtaination as soon as possible.

✓ We can obtain information as soon as possible.

'obtaination' は存在しない単語です。正しい名詞は 'information' で、動詞は 'obtain' です。改善のために: 単語を作らないで、既存の語彙を確認してください。

× Yes I have and actually I already have it.

✓ Yes, I already have my own website.

'Yes I have and actually I already have it.' は冗長で不自然です。質問に対して簡潔に 'Yes, I already have my own website.' と答えるのが適切です。改善のために: 冗長な重複を避け、簡潔に述べてください。

× Through my website I express my feeling and opinion with others visitors and it works as public forum for me.

✓ Through my website I express my feelings and opinions to other visitors, and it works as a public forum for me.

'feeling and opinion' は複数形にするのが自然です。'with others visitors' は語順と前置詞の誤りで 'to other visitors' が正しいです。また 'public forum' の前に不定冠詞 'a' が必要です。改善のために: 複数形の使用、前置詞の選択、冠詞の有無を確認してください。

× Websites offers me a lot of narratives including the information which we cannot learn at school or from family and friends.

✓ Websites offer me a lot of narratives, including information that we cannot learn at school or from family and friends.

主語 'Websites' は複数なので動詞は 'offer' のように複数形に一致させる必要があります。'the information which' は冗長なので 'information that' と簡潔にしました。改善のために: 主語と動詞の一致を常に確認し、関係代名詞の選択を意識してください。

× The experts or There are many experts around social networking service and they comment on.

✓ There are many experts on social networking services who comment on various topics.

原文は重複と断片が混在しています。'The experts or There are' のような重複を避け、'social networking service' は複数形 'services' が自然です。'comment on' は目的語が必要なので 'comment on various topics' としました。改善のために: 文章の主語・述語の一貫性を保ち、句の完結性を確認してください。