Advertisement— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific examples using linking words. Avoid repetition and fix verb forms (e.g., "I'm a subscriber").

예시: Yes. I see many ads on my phone and computer. For example, while scrolling social media I often encounter ads for beauty products, and I also see ads on streaming services like Netflix and YouTube, even though I use a paid subscription. These appear frequently throughout the day.

제안: Provide a clear topic sentence, then give concrete details and explain why it impressed you. Use linking words (for example, because, so) and correct unclear phrases (e.g., "owner diet" unclear).

예시: Yes. One ad that stayed with me featured a golden retriever showing deep loyalty to its owner. I remember a scene where the dog refused to eat because its owner was unwell, which made the message about companionship very powerful. Because of that emotional scene, the ad made a strong impression on me.

제안: Answer directly, then support with a clear comparison and correct grammar. Use linking words like 'however' or 'on the other hand'. Avoid vague statements like 'it is a good.'

예시: No, I don't see many ads on trains nowadays because most companies prefer social media advertising. In the past, trains and buses often had posters on their sides, which looked cluttered. However, moving ads online reaches more people and is more cost-effective.

제안: Be consistent: give a clear stance then explain with specific reasons and examples. Fix grammar and vocabulary (e.g., 'clothing', 'fairness creams'), and avoid contradictions in one sentence.

예시: Generally, I don't like most advertisements because they interrupt what I'm doing. However, I do appreciate ads for beauty products or clothing from local brands since they introduce new options. I dislike ads that promote unrealistic beauty standards, such as fairness creams, because they can be misleading.

제안: Give a clear topic sentence, then give two specific types with reasons and one brief example. Eliminate fillers and repetitions, and use linking words like 'because' and 'for example'.

예시: I prefer ads that promote new local brands because they help small businesses gain customers. I also like advertisements about studying abroad or educational programs since they provide useful information for future plans, for example, university fair ads that explain scholarship options.

× Advertisements have become very much common nowadays.

✓ Advertisements have become very common nowadays.

'Very much common' is unidiomatic. 'Common' is an adjective that is modified by 'very' (adverb). Use 'very common' instead of 'very much common'.

× While scrolling through the social media, I often see advertisements related to beauty products.

✓ While scrolling through social media, I often see advertisements related to beauty products.

'The social media' is incorrect here because 'social media' is a general uncountable concept and usually used without 'the'. Remove 'the' before 'social media'.

× I have seen a lot of advertisements in Netflix too.

✓ I have seen a lot of advertisements on Netflix too.

Use the preposition 'on' with platforms like Netflix. 'In Netflix' is incorrect.

× Though I am a subscribe though I prefer to use a subscribed version but sometimes advertisement comes there too and also YouTube and other platforms are.

✓ Although I am subscribed and prefer the paid version, sometimes advertisements still appear there and on YouTube and other platforms.

Multiple issues: 'subscribe' should be past participle 'subscribed', double 'though' and incorrect conjunctions. Rephrase to use 'Although' and correct verb form, 'advertisements' plural, and use 'on' for platforms. Streamline sentence structure.

× Is there an advertisement that made an impression on you when you were a child?

✓ Was there an advertisement that made an impression on you when you were a child?

Question refers to a past time ('when you were a child'), so use past tense 'Was there' instead of 'Is there' to match time reference.

× The main objective of the advertisement I can't remember but it had an impact on me that how the dogs are so much attached to their owners.

✓ I can't remember the main objective of the advertisement, but it showed how dogs can be very attached to their owners and had an impact on me.

Sentence needs reordering for clarity and correct verb forms: 'I can't remember' should come first, and 'that how the dogs are so much attached' is ungrammatical. Use 'showed how dogs can be very attached'.

× Like I can remember his owner diet and that's why he was not eating.

✓ For example, I remember the owner's diet and that's why he was not eating.

'His owner diet' lacks possessive punctuation; use 'the owner's diet'. Also begin with a clearer connector like 'For example' instead of 'Like' for formal speech.

× So that was advertisement.

✓ So that was the advertisement.

'Advertisement' needs a definite article here because it refers to a specific advertisement previously mentioned.

× Not a lot because of the availability of social media.

✓ Not a lot, because of the widespread availability of social media.

Add 'widespread' to clarify the reason; 'availability of social media' alone is slightly awkward. Also include a comma for sentence flow.

× Most of the advertisements are being shown on social media than on public transports now.

✓ Most advertisements are shown on social media rather than on public transport nowadays.

'Than' should be paired with 'rather' ('rather than'). 'Public transports' is incorrect; use 'public transport' or 'public transportation'. Use 'nowadays' for adverb placement.

× But on earlier days advertisements were pasted on the body of the train and buses, which definitely didn't look good.

✓ But in earlier days, advertisements were pasted on the bodies of trains and buses, which definitely didn't look good.

Use 'in earlier days' and plural 'bodies of trains and buses' for grammatical agreement. Add comma after introductory phrase.

× So I think it is a good.

✓ So I think it is good.

'A good' is incomplete because 'good' is an adjective and needs a noun after 'a' (e.g., 'a good change'). Omit 'a' to form a correct predicative adjective.

× Not at all though I prefer some advertisements that are related to beauty products or clothings which are really good.

✓ Not at all, though I prefer some advertisements that are related to beauty products or clothing, which are really good.

'Clothings' is incorrect plural; 'clothing' is an uncountable noun. Add commas to separate clauses and improve flow.

× Like they promote really good brands even from some outskirts.

✓ For example, they promote really good brands even from the outskirts.

Replace informal 'Like' with 'For example' and use 'the outskirts' (with 'the') for correct noun phrase. 'Even from some outskirts' is awkward.

× But some advertisement like which claims fairness screens.

✓ But some advertisements, such as those that claim to improve fairness, are problematic.

Unclear fragment. 'Advertisement like which claims fairness screens' is ungrammatical; clarify meaning and use plural 'advertisements' and 'claim to improve fairness'.

× As I have said earlier, advertisement that promote local brands that are new and are unknown to people.

✓ As I said earlier, advertisements that promote local brands which are new and unknown to people appeal to me.

Sentence is a fragment; needs a main verb. Use plural 'advertisements' and rephrase to include 'appeal to me' to complete thought.

× I I definitely like those kind of advertisements and also some advertisement regarding any abroad study or educational, uh, thing.

✓ I definitely like those kinds of advertisements, and also some advertisements about studying abroad or educational programs.

'I I' duplicate, 'those kind of' should be 'those kinds of' (or 'that kind of'), and 'advertisement' should be plural. 'Regarding any abroad study' is unnatural; use 'about studying abroad' or 'educational programs'.

× I like them too because I think they are really important.

✓ I like them too because I think they are really important.

This sentence is correct; no grammatical correction needed.