Advertisement— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more direct and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence stating whether you remember an ad, then give one specific supporting detail or example. Use linking words to connect ideas and avoid repetition and self-correction. Keep to 2–4 sentences.

예시: I can't recall a specific advertisement from my childhood, but I do remember that ads back then felt more creative. For example, local TV commercials often used catchy jingles that stuck in my head, which made them memorable.

제안: Answer directly and correct grammar (singular/plural, articles). Provide one clear reason and one brief effect. Use linking words like 'because' or 'so' to organize your answer and avoid vague phrases like 'thousands for the same company.'

예시: I see a lot of advertising while driving because many billboards target motorists. As a result, the same brands often repeat on different billboards, which can be effective but occasionally annoying.

제안: Good structure and clear opinion. To improve, make sentences more natural and avoid redundancy (e.g., 'customers and brands' repeated). Add a brief specific example of usefulness and a linking word for contrast ('however' is fine).

예시: Yes, I like advertisements because they help customers discover useful products and help brands gain recognition. For example, an ad for a time-saving kitchen gadget helped me find something that made cooking easier; however, excessive ads can become irritating.

제안: Be concise and avoid hesitation. Start with a topic sentence naming the types you prefer, then give a specific reason and a short example. Correct minor grammar (e.g., 'funny one' not 'funny 1').

예시: I prefer creative or humorous advertisements because they stand out and are memorable. For instance, a clever funny ad for a phone app made me pay attention and later download the app because it entertained me.

제안: Good content but tighten language and fix small errors (remove extra words like 'it's' twice). Give one specific example of a targeted ad and its benefit. Use linking words such as 'for example' or 'because'.

예시: Yes, I often see ads on my phone, especially on social media, because local brands use these platforms to reach customers. For example, I recently saw targeted ads for running shoes after searching for them online, which helped me compare options quickly.

× I don't remember right now in your advertisements that made an impression that I would still remember till now, but when I was younger, advertisement advertisements back in the day were fabulous and were creative as well.

✓ I don't remember any advertisements that made an impression which I would still remember now, but when I was younger, advertisements back in the day were fabulous and creative.

The sentence uses incorrect and missing articles and has a duplicated word 'advertisement advertisements'. Use 'any advertisements' to refer generally in a negative context and plural 'advertisements'. Remove redundant words and replace 'till now' with 'now' for natural usage. Also change 'that made an impression that I would still remember' to 'which I would still remember' to improve clarity.

× Uh, the most advertisement I see is during driving because most of the Billboard are targeted towards people who are riding their cars.

✓ Uh, the most advertisements I see are while driving because most of the billboards are targeted towards people who are driving their cars.

Subject and verb must agree: 'advertisements' (plural) requires 'are'. 'Billboard' should be plural 'billboards' and 'during driving' is awkward; use 'while driving'. Also 'riding their cars' is incorrect collocation; use 'driving their cars'.

× So it's mostly when I'm driving I see a lot of them and actually thousands for the same company.

✓ So mostly when I'm driving I see a lot of them, often thousands for the same company.

The original has awkward word order and missing commas. 'Actually thousands for the same company' is informal and unclear; 'often thousands for the same company' is clearer. Move 'mostly' before the clause for natural flow.

× And sometimes I get irritated but it gets cool.

✓ And sometimes I get irritated, but sometimes it can be amusing.

The phrase 'it gets cool' is informal and unclear in this context. Use 'it can be amusing' to convey that some adverts are entertaining despite being irritating. Maintain present habitual tense with 'get' and 'can be'.

× Of course, advertisements are very useful for the customers, for the brands.

✓ Of course, advertisements are very useful for customers and for brands.

Using 'the' before 'customers' and 'brands' is unnecessary when speaking generally. Remove definite articles to express general statements.

× It's actually the bridge between the customers and the brands and it's a way to get recognized and for customers as well to find products that can make their life easier.

✓ They are actually a bridge between customers and brands; they help brands get recognized and help customers find products that can make their lives easier.

Pronoun and sentence structure issues: 'It's' (singular) mismatches plural 'advertisements'. Use 'They' and plural verbs. 'Their life' should be 'their lives' when referring to people in general. Split into clearer clauses.

× However, too much or too many of them can be very irritating.

✓ However, too many of them can be very irritating.

'Too much' is used with uncountable nouns, 'too many' with countable plural nouns like 'advertisements'. Use 'too many'.

× It's either the creative one or the funny 1.

✓ I prefer either creative or funny advertisements.

'the creative one or the funny 1' is ungrammatical and includes a numeral '1'. Use a clear comparative preference: 'I prefer either creative or funny advertisements.' Match plural 'advertisements'.

× I believe it's a very hard to make or come up with the idea that is funny in advertisements because it's hard to make me laugh.

✓ I believe it's very hard to come up with an idea that is funny in advertisements because it's hard to make me laugh.

Remove the extra 'a' in 'a very hard' and use 'come up with an idea' for natural phrasing. Maintain present tense 'is' and 'is hard'.

× So when I found that an advertisement that makes me laugh, I actually appreciate that a lot.

✓ So when I find an advertisement that makes me laugh, I appreciate it a lot.

Tense and agreement: 'found' (past) conflicts with present habitual context; use 'find'. Also remove redundant 'that' and replace 'that' with pronoun 'it'. Subject-verb agreement: 'I appreciate it' is correct.

× Of course, social media are full of advertisements, especially for local brands because this it's the only way for them to reach customers or new customers.

✓ Of course, social media are full of advertisements, especially for local brands because it's the only way for them to reach customers or new ones.

The phrase 'customers or new customers' is redundant; use 'customers or new ones'. Also remove extraneous 'this'. 'Social media are' is acceptable (plural), but ensure clarity and avoid repetition.

× However, these ads are mostly targeted, so it's it's actually for the things I need or search for, so sometimes they are very useful.

✓ However, these ads are mostly targeted, so they are actually for things I need or search for; sometimes they are very useful.

Remove duplicate 'it's' and correct pronoun reference: 'they' refers to 'ads'. Place 'actually' before the phrase it modifies. Streamline sentence for clarity and correct adverb placement.