Dreams— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more organized: start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details. Avoid fillers and unclear abbreviations (e.g., "SM"). Use linking words for coherence and vary vocabulary (e.g., "recall", "vivid"). Keep answers under five sentences.

예시: I can remember some of my dreams, especially the vivid ones. For example, when I have a nightmare I often recall small details like faces and places. However, I rarely remember every dream from the night, so only a few stand out to me.

제안: Answer directly then explain briefly with one clear reason and an example. Avoid repetition and unclear cultural references without explanation. Use linking words (e.g., "however", "because") and correct grammar ("very close friends", "my mother").

예시: I usually don't share my dreams, although I will tell them to very close friends or my mother. This is because my religion discourages telling dreams to others; instead, people sometimes perform a ritual with water to release the dream's energy.

제안: Begin with a clear stance, then give one specific cultural belief as supporting detail. Use correct grammar and clearer expressions (e.g., "dreams about death or losing teeth are often seen as omens in my culture"). Avoid vague or repetitive phrasing.

예시: Yes, I think some dreams can have special meanings. For instance, in my culture dreaming about graves, death, or losing teeth is often interpreted as a sign that someone close may fall ill or pass away, so people pay attention to those dreams.

제안: Start with a direct answer about whether you want to achieve goals or dreams, then give a concise, relevant personal example. Avoid irrelevant repetition and emotional fillers like repeated apologies. Keep it within three sentences and use clear vocabulary (e.g., "ideal partner").

예시: Yes, I want to make my dreams come true, especially personal ones like finding the right partner. For example, I recently dreamed about my ideal husband and I hope to meet someone creative and caring in real life, so I try to be open to new connections and activities where I can meet people.

× Sometimes yeah, sometimes no.

✓ Sometimes yes, sometimes no.

Replace informal 'yeah' with 'yes' to match neutral spoken English; this is a present tense choice and formality adjustment rather than a tense change.

× Like whenever I had a nightmare, I remember the SM even small details.

✓ Whenever I have a nightmare, I remember the same even small details.

Tense consistency: the clause uses past 'had' but the general habit should be present 'have'. 'SM' seems to be a typo for 'same'. Ensure noun agreement and sequence of tenses for habitual actions.

× But it depends like uh, I don't, I never seen a person that says I remember all my dreams.

✓ But it depends; I don't; I have never seen a person who says 'I remember all my dreams.'

Use present perfect 'have never seen' for experience up to now. Use relative pronoun 'who' for people. Add punctuation and correct verb form 'seen' requires auxiliary 'have'.

× But like some memories or some dreams are like unforgettable and I remember some.

✓ Some memories or dreams are unforgettable, and I remember those.

Avoid repetitive 'like' and improve cohesion: use 'those' to refer back. Simplify sentence structure for clarity.

× To be honest, I'm not interested in anyone's dream.

✓ To be honest, I'm not interested in anyone's dreams.

Use plural 'dreams' to match 'anyone' general reference to multiple possible dreams; this is a quantifier/number choice aligning with modal expression of interest.

× But yeah, sometimes I share with like very close friends, very, very close friends or some like with my mom sometimes.

✓ But sometimes I share them with very close friends or with my mother.

Specify the object 'them' (dreams), remove filler 'like' and redundant repetitions, and use 'mother' for formal clarity. Clean structure improves readability.

× But in our religion it's more believed to not tell your dreams to anyone.

✓ But in our religion it is believed that you should not tell your dreams to anyone.

Use passive construction 'it is believed that' and add modal 'should' for advice; correct infinitive placement and preposition use.

× Just tell it to your water.

✓ They say you should tell them to the water.

Clarify subject and object: 'them' refers to dreams, and 'the water' makes sense as a cultural practice. Use plural pronoun and correct article.

× Just tell to you to water.

✓ Just tell them to the water.

Incorrect word order and pronouns; use 'tell them to the water' with correct object pronoun and article.

× So because it holds energy, utilize it make your.

✓ People believe water holds the dream's energy, so they use it for rituals.

Original fragment is incomplete and ungrammatical. Provide a coherent correction preserving intended meaning: explain that water holds energy and is used, completing the sentence.

× Yes, I do believe that some dreams have special meaning, specially when you see grave, when you see yourself dead we believe in a few teeth falls and in your dream, so it's means some someone close in your family will gonna die.

✓ Yes, I believe some dreams have special meanings, especially when you see a grave or see yourself dead. In our belief, if a few teeth fall in your dream, it means someone close in your family might die.

Multiple issues: use present simple for belief, 'especially' spelling, add articles 'a grave', separate clauses for clarity, correct 'teeth falls' to 'teeth fall', avoid colloquial 'gonna' and use 'might' for prediction. Ensure subject-verb agreement and correct modal.

× So yeah, some dreams very holds meaningful meaning.

✓ So yes, some dreams hold meaningful significance.

Remove redundant words ('very holds meaningful meaning'), correct verb placement 'dreams hold', and use 'significance' instead of repeating 'meaning'.

× Yeah, because like a few days ago I dreamed that I made my dream guy and my dream husband.

✓ Yes, because a few days ago I dreamed that I had met my dream guy, my future husband.

Use past simple 'dreamed' is fine but clarify 'made' is incorrect; use 'had met' or 'met' to express encountering someone in the dream. 'Future husband' clarifies intended meaning.

× So I want him to be creative in real life 'cause right now I'm missing him a lot.

✓ So I want him to be creative in real life because right now I miss him a lot.

Use 'because' in full rather than colloquial ''cause'. Use present simple 'I miss him' for current feeling rather than progressive.

× I don't know what he's doing.

✓ I don't know what he is doing.

Contraction expanded but both are correct; keep consistent formality. Present continuous is appropriate for current ongoing action.

× I don't know what he's right now doing.

✓ I don't know what he is doing right now.

Correct adverb placement: 'right now' should follow the verb phrase 'is doing' or be at end of clause. Maintain present continuous tense.

× I'm scared and I'm curious what he's doing right now.

✓ I'm scared and curious about what he is doing right now.

Use 'curious about' to link emotion to the clause; reduce repetition of 'I'm'. Use correct clause connector.

× Sorry, I'm sorry.

✓ Sorry.

Redundant repetition; single 'Sorry' is sufficient and clearer.