Dreams— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: 整体回答明白，但有语法和措辞问题，句子较冗长且细节不足。建议：1) 使用更自然的开头句，如“I can”或“I remember dreaming that…”；2) 修正语法（e.g. ‘I dreamed of being a teacher’；‘children’复数）；3) 补充一到两句具体细节（为什么想当老师、特别喜欢哪类孩子或科目）；4) 控制在不超过5句并用连接词使逻辑更顺畅。

예시: Yes, I can. When I was at primary school I dreamed of becoming a teacher because I enjoyed helping younger students with reading and games. I liked working with children aged six to ten and thought teaching would be a rewarding job.

제안: 回答不够自然，语法和用词有误，信息不够具体。建议：1) 避免使用疑问句开头，直接回答“Yes/No”；2) 修正词汇（‘advice’不可数，‘teach me how to’或‘give me guidance’）；3) 提供具体情境说明何时分享、向谁求助以及他们如何帮助；4) 使用连接词如‘because’或‘so’使句子流畅。

예시: Yes, I often share my dreams with my family and close friends because they give me practical advice and encouragement. For example, my mother helped me find volunteer work at a school and my friend gave tips on teacher training courses.

제안: 观点清晰但表达重复且略笼统。建议：1) 开门见山地给出主题句，如‘I think dreams have personal meaning’；2) 用更具体的解释和例子说明如何‘给予力量’（例如设定目标、提高自信）；3) 使用连接词（e.g. ‘for example’, ‘so’）使论述更连贯；4) 避免数字序号和口语化标记。

예시: I think dreams often have personal meaning because they give people a sense of purpose and motivation. For example, having a clear goal can help someone stay confident during setbacks and make concrete plans to improve.

제안: 回答积极但有重复和啰嗦。建议：1) 用一到两句直接说明愿望和原因；2) 用更自然的表达替代‘in the foreseeable future’（如‘in the future’或‘I hope to’）；3) 给出具体行动或计划说明如何实现梦想；4) 保持句子简洁，避免冗余。

예시: Yes, I hope to make my dreams come true in the future because achieving them would boost my confidence. To do this, I plan to study education at university and gain experience by volunteering at local schools.

× In primary school, I had dreamed of being a teacher when I grew up.

✓ In primary school, I dreamed of being a teacher when I grew up.

句子使用过去完成时（had dreamed）不合上下文。此句是在叙述过去的经历，应该使用一般过去时（dreamed）。建议将过去完成时改为一般过去时，表示在过去时期的愿望或想法。

× I wanted to stay with child and play with them.

✓ I wanted to stay with children and play with them.

原句中“child”为单数，但代词“them”指复数，且意思应为和多个孩子在一起。这里应使用复数“children”以保持一致。建议将单数名词改为复数。

× Will I always share my dream with family members or my friends?

✓ I always share my dreams with my family members or my friends.

考官的问题是询问习惯性行为，学生不应用疑问句“Will I...”，而应陈述现在的习惯。应使用一般现在时或现在习惯表达，且“dream”用复数“dreams”更自然。建议把疑问句改为肯定句并使用一般现在时。

× I usually ask them for advices and also I want them to teach me how I can do.

✓ I usually ask them for advice and I also want them to teach me how I can do it.

“advices”是不正确的复数形式，正确不可数名词为“advice”。另外句子末尾缺少宾语，应添加“it”来指代“实现梦想的方法”。语序方面，将“I also”放在动词前更自然。建议把“advices”改为“advice”，并补全宾语“it”。

× They can encourage people to deal with the challenge.

✓ They can encourage people to deal with challenges.

前文泛指梦带来的力量，使用定冠词“the”使“challenge”显得特指，语义不自然。应改为复数“challenges”表示一般性困难。建议去掉定冠词并使用复数名词。

× in the foreseeable future, I will be very happy to see my dreams come true, and I think making dreams come true can give me power to face more challenges.

✓ In the foreseeable future, I will be very happy to see my dreams come true, and I think making dreams come true will give me the power to face more challenges.

句中第二部分用现在时“can give”显得时态不一致，且想表达将来发生的结果应使用将来时“will give”。另外“power”前加定冠词“the”更自然，表示具体的那种力量。建议将“can give”改为“will give”，并在“power”前加“the”。