Dreams— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be clearer and more grammatical: start with a direct topic sentence, use correct verb tenses, avoid unnecessary words, and give one or two specific supporting details. Keep it within 3–4 sentences and use linking words (for example, 'however', 'so', 'because').

예시: Yes. I dreamed of becoming a civil engineer when I was younger. However, because my family faced financial difficulties, I started full-time work in 2024 to help support us. Despite that, I still hope to study engineering in the future.

제안: Improve grammar and coherence: give a clear topic sentence then specific supporting details. Use appropriate verbs and linking words (e.g., 'also', 'so', 'therefore'). Be concise and avoid repetition.

예시: Yes, I often share my dreams with my siblings and close friends. I also ask about their dreams and listen carefully so they feel supported. Then I offer practical suggestions or resources to help them make progress.

제안: Make your opinion clear and support it with specific reasons or examples. Use correct sentence structure and linking phrases (e.g., 'for example', 'sometimes', 'therefore'). Avoid vague repetition.

예시: Yes, I believe dreams can have special meanings because they reflect our hopes and goals. Sometimes dreams come true in unexpected ways or at different times. For example, a friend of mine became an architect years after changing careers, which inspired me.

제안: Answer directly and give concrete steps or reasons. Use accurate vocabulary and avoid unclear phrases ('shadows in my name'). Keep it to 2–3 clear sentences and include linking words (e.g., 'because', 'so', 'therefore').

예시: Yes, I definitely want to make my dream come true because becoming a civil engineer would be a major personal achievement. To reach that goal, I plan to save money, take evening classes in engineering, and gain experience through internships.

× I once have dreamed to become a civil engineer, however time comes didn't plan a Noel because of the financial stability of my parents, so I decided to find full time work way back 2024 to support my myself and to maintain.

✓ I once dreamed of becoming a civil engineer, however circumstances did not allow it because of my parents' financial situation, so I decided to find full-time work back in 2024 to support myself and maintain our household.

Errors: incorrect use of 'have dreamed' (unnecessary present perfect), incorrect verb phrase 'to become' after dreamed (use 'of becoming'), wrong noun 'Noel' and unclear phrase 'time comes didn't plan a Noel' (unclear and ungrammatical), incorrect possessive and reflexive use 'my myself', missing hyphen in 'full-time', and awkward 'to maintain'. Suggestions: use simple past 'dreamed' for a past desire, use 'dreamed of becoming', replace unclear phrase with 'circumstances did not allow it' or similar, use 'my parents' financial situation' for clarity, use 'support myself' and 'maintain our household' or 'maintain myself' depending on meaning.

× I do share my dreams to my siblings and to my friends.

✓ I share my dreams with my siblings and my friends.

Errors: incorrect preposition 'to' after 'share' — correct collocation is 'share something with someone'. Also present simple is more natural here than 'I do share' unless for emphasis. Suggestion: use 'share with' and simple present 'I share'.

× I also interesting about their dreams too.

✓ I am also interested in their dreams.

Errors: 'interesting' is an adjective describing something that causes interest, but the speaker needs the passive adjective 'interested' to describe themselves; wrong preposition 'about' should be 'in'; redundant 'also' and 'too' — keep one. Suggestion: use 'I am interested in'.

× I do listening them properly so that they can feel that they heard and acknowledge their dreams.

✓ I listen to them carefully so that they feel heard and acknowledged about their dreams.

Errors: 'do listening' is ungrammatical (use 'listen' or 'am listening'); missing preposition 'to' after 'listen'; tense/voice issues 'they can feel that they heard' should be 'they feel heard'; 'acknowledge their dreams' requires passive 'acknowledged' or 'that I acknowledge their dreams'. Suggestion: use 'I listen to them carefully so that they feel heard and acknowledged'.

× And also I make sure that I can provide ideas on how will they come and improve that kind of enhance that.

✓ I also make sure that I can provide ideas on how they can achieve and improve their dreams.

Errors: incorrect word order 'how will they come' (question word order used inside a statement), unclear phrases 'that kind of enhance that'. Suggestion: use 'how they can achieve and improve their dreams' with correct word order and clearer vocabulary.

× Yes, because dream has that special meanings and also dream will always come true.

✓ Yes, because dreams have special meanings and dreams can come true.

Errors: missing plural/article: use plural 'dreams' or 'a dream'; 'has that special meanings' mixes singular verb with plural noun—should be 'dreams have special meanings'; 'will always come true' is too absolute — 'can come true' is more natural. Suggestion: match noun and verb number and use appropriate modal.

× Might be in different way, might be, might be in different path, different time.

✓ They might come about in different ways, by different paths, and at different times.

Errors: sentence fragments lacking subject and verb; 'might be in different way' lacks plural 'ways' and correct phrasing. Suggestion: include subject 'they' and use plural nouns and parallel structure.

× And also you can encounter many people dreaming and you can inspire yourself on how to dream and how will you achieve those dreams and make sure you.

✓ You can meet many people who are dreaming, and you can be inspired by them about how to dream and how you will achieve those dreams.

Errors: 'encounter many people dreaming' is acceptable but 'inspire yourself on' is incorrect — 'be inspired by' is correct; 'how will you achieve' uses question word order inside statement; 'make sure you' is incomplete. Suggestion: use 'be inspired by them' and proper word order 'how you will achieve' and complete the thought.

× Of course I want I really want the idea of coming through my dreams because it's a big achievement for myself become becoming a civil engineer.

✓ Of course I really want my dreams to come true because becoming a civil engineer would be a big achievement for me.

Errors: repetition 'I want I really want'; awkward 'the idea of coming through my dreams'; incorrect gerund/infinitive 'for myself become becoming'; tense/voice should be conditional 'would be'. Suggestion: simplify to 'I really want my dreams to come true' and 'becoming a civil engineer would be a big achievement'.

× It was a priceless for me because I really want that job.

✓ It would be priceless to me because I really want that job.

Errors: 'a priceless' incorrect use — 'priceless' is an adjective, not a noun; tense mismatch 'was' vs conditional 'would be'; suggestion: use 'would be priceless to me'.

× I really want that shadows in my name and also it can enhance my structure and.

✓ I really want that recognition in my name, and I believe it would also enhance my status and abilities.

Errors: 'that shadows in my name' is unclear and ungrammatical — likely meant 'recognition' or 'reputation'; 'enhance my structure' is incorrect collocation; sentence fragment ending with 'and.' Suggestion: replace with 'recognition' and specify what would be enhanced (status, skills, abilities), and complete the sentence.