Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be direct and correct tense: start with a clear topic sentence in the past (e.g., “Yes, I had a bike when I was a child.”). Remove repetition and fix grammar (use past tense consistently). Add one or two specific supporting details using linking words (e.g., “However,” “So,” or “Therefore”) and avoid long, disjointed phrases. Pronouns and possessives should be clear (e.g., “my barber’s employee” is awkward — say “a barber’s assistant” or “a friend who worked at the barbershop”). Keep the answer to no more than 3–4 sentences.

예시: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. It was an old bike owned by a friend who worked at our local barbershop, and I often borrowed it to practice riding. Because I didn’t have lessons, I taught myself to balance and pedal, so I became confident riding around my neighborhood.

제안: Begin with a clear topic sentence and use plural forms and correct articles (e.g., “Bikes are very popular…”). Provide specific reasons and use linking words (e.g., “for example,” “also,” “because”) to make the answer coherent. Add one concrete example or statistic if possible and avoid vague phrases like “anything not so heavy.” Limit to 3–4 concise sentences.

예시: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country because they are cheap and convenient. For example, many people use bicycles for commuting to work, and delivery workers often use bikes to transport food and small parcels. As a result, bicycles are a common sight in both cities and smaller towns.

× Yes I do have a bike when I was a child but it was just a barrel bike from my from our barbers employee that time and I usually borrow his bike and then learn and then learn from myself.

✓ Yes, I had a bike when I was a child, but it was just a barrel bike belonging to an employee at our barber's shop, and I usually borrowed his bike and learned to ride on my own.

The sentence mixes present tense ('do have', 'usually borrow') with past time reference ('when I was a child'), causing tense inconsistency. Use past tense for events in the past: 'had' instead of 'do have', 'borrowed' instead of 'borrow', and 'learned' to show completed past action. Also fix word choice and possessive form: 'barber's shop' and 'belonging to an employee' and use 'learned to ride on my own' for clarity.

× Yes, bike is is popular in our country because I can see many people use bike even in their work.

✓ Yes, bikes are popular in our country because I can see many people use bikes even at work.

The noun 'bike' should be plural when referring to bikes in general ('bikes are popular'). Also fix subject-verb agreement: use 'are' not 'is'. Use 'bikes' after 'use' to match plural reference. Replace 'in their work' with 'at work' for natural preposition use.

× They also use bike as a delivery transportation for food or anything not so heavy.

✓ They also use bikes as a means of delivery for food or other not-so-heavy items.

Use plural 'bikes' to match general reference and countable noun usage. 'Use as a delivery transportation' is awkward; 'a means of delivery' is natural. Add article 'a' with 'means' and change 'anything' to 'other items' for clarity. Hyphenate 'not-so-heavy' as a compound modifier.