Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Your answer is personal and informative, but it is a bit long-winded and slightly repetitive. To improve, start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details linked logically. Avoid unnecessary background that doesn't directly answer the question. Use linking words like “because” or “so” to connect ideas, but keep sentences concise and vary vocabulary (e.g., “receive,” “gift,” “share with”).

예시: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. It was a pink bicycle my father bought for me when he returned from a trip to the DRC, and I remember being very excited because he had been away when I was born. I often shared it with my siblings and neighbors, which taught me to take turns and cooperate.

제안: This answer is clear and relevant, but it contains some repetition and could be improved with more specific reasons and a linking phrase to structure the response. Start with a direct opinion, then give one or two specific reasons or an example. Use comparative or quantitative words precisely (e.g., “about two out of ten people”) and add a concluding remark or prediction to enrich the response.

예시: No, bicycles are not very popular in my country — probably only about two out of ten people own one. One main reason is the lack of dedicated bike lanes, which makes riding unsafe on busy roads. As a result, most people prefer motorbikes or cars for daily transport.

× My father bought it for me when he travelled to DRC because when I was born he was not around, so he was very happy about it.

✓ My father bought it for me when he travelled to the DRC because he was not around when I was born, so he was very happy about it.

The sentence has issues with word order and missing article. 'DRC' (Democratic Republic of the Congo) should be preceded by the definite article 'the'. The clause 'when I was born he was not around' is clearer as 'he was not around when I was born' to follow natural English chronology. This maintains past tense consistency. Suggestion: place time reference ('when I was born') after or before the main clause in a way that preserves clarity and include 'the' before 'DRC'.

× So yes, I had a pink bike and I had to share it with my siblings and my neighbors.

✓ So yes, I had a pink bike and I had to share it with my siblings and my neighbours.

The sentence is grammatically correct in number agreement ('bike' singular and 'siblings' plural) but 'neighbors' spelling varies by dialect. No pluralization error exists; however, ensure consistent British or American English spelling. Suggestion: choose 'neighbours' for British English or 'neighbors' for American English.

× Bikes are not so popular in my country.

✓ Bikes are not very popular in my country.

'Not so popular' is understandable but informally marked; 'not very popular' is more natural in standard English. The present simple tense is correct for general facts. Suggestion: prefer 'not very popular' for clearer expression.

× You find one or two people with them, but out of 10 you find like two people with them.

✓ You might find one or two people with them; out of ten people, maybe two have bikes.

The original repeats 'you find' awkwardly and uses 'like' colloquially. Also 'out of 10 you find like two people with them' is informal and unclear. Rewriting improves sentence structure, removes colloquial filler, and clarifies meaning. Suggestion: use modal 'might' for possibility and rephrase numeric expression as 'out of ten people, maybe two have bikes.'

× I think the main reason why there are no bikes is there are no bike paths to drive them around.

✓ I think the main reason there are no bikes is that there are no bike paths to ride them on.

Several issues: unnecessary 'why' after 'reason'—'the reason that' or 'the reason why' is acceptable but combining 'the main reason why there are no bikes is there are no' is awkward. More importantly, the verb for using a bike is 'ride', not 'drive', and the correct preposition is 'on' for paths. Also use 'that' to introduce the clause for clarity. Suggestion: say 'the main reason there are no bikes is that there are no bike paths to ride them on.'