Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: 回答は意味が伝わる部分もありますが、流暢さと明瞭さに問題があります。不要なフィラー（umm, uh, well）が多く、文が断片的で時制や理由があいまいです。改善点：①フィラーを減らして、短く明確なトピック文を言う（例：Yes, I did.）②時系列や理由を整理して、接続詞（when, but, because）で論理的につなぐ。③具体的な年齢や状況を加えて内容を充実させる。練習方法：質問に対してまず1文で答え、その後1〜2文で具体的な詳細（いつ、なぜ、結果）を述べる練習をする。

예시: Yes, I did. I learned to ride a bike when I was six and could ride confidently until the third year of elementary school. However, I stopped riding regularly after I entered junior high because I moved farther from school and my parents preferred I take public transport.

제안: 答えは分かりやすく意図も伝わりますが、繰り返しやフィラーが多く、語彙の選択と文の構造を改善するとより自然になります。改善点：①繰り返しを避ける（"who who"を直す）。②具体例を整理して、接続詞（for example, because）で流れを作る。③語彙を少し豊かにして“move from buildings to gym”の代わりに“commute around campus”などを使う。

예시: Yes, I think so. For example, at my university many students commute around campus by bike because the campus is large and cycling is faster than walking. I often see students using bikes to get to classes, the gym, or club activities.

× Yes, umm, but umm, well, when I was, I started, uh, until I became third year of umm, elementary school, umm, I could ride a bike, but because of the intrinsic sound for umm junior high school, I couldn't.

✓ Yes. I started riding a bike when I was in the third year of elementary school, and I could ride it until junior high school, but I could not ride it after that.

The original sentence has unclear and fragmented structure, unnecessary pauses, and incorrect phrasing ('until I became third year of elementary school', 'intrinsic sound for junior high school'). This is a sentence structure error (ID 26). To improve: combine ideas into clear clauses, use correct prepositional phrases ('in the third year of elementary school'), use continuous verb form for 'start' with gerund ('started riding'), and express the contrast with 'but'. Remove filler words ('umm', 'uh'). Use 'could not' or 'couldn't' for inability in the past.

× I would say yes umm I am a university student and in my university UMM there are many people who who are riding bikes to umm move from umm buildings to gym, the gym or club activity.

✓ I would say yes. I am a university student, and at my university UMM many people ride bikes to get from one building to the gym or to their club activities.

The original sentence misuses prepositions and has awkward verb forms ('in my university' is acceptable but 'at my university' is more natural; 'riding bikes to move from buildings to gym' is incorrect). This is an incorrect use of prepositions (ID 11) and related word choice. To improve: use 'at' for location of an institution, 'ride bikes' for habitual action, and 'get from one building to the gym' or 'to their club activities'. Remove duplicate words ('who who') and fillers.