Headphones— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid fillers and repetition, and add one specific detail. Use linking words if needed.

예시: Yes, I often wear headphones on the sky train when commuting to and from school. I usually use them when I travel alone because I enjoy listening to music to relax and pass the time.

제안: Correct repetition and article use, and give a brief reason with a linking word. Use clearer vocabulary (wired headphones, Bluetooth ones).

예시: I usually use wired headphones when commuting to school because they are more reliable and I don't misplace them as often as Bluetooth ones.

제안: Avoid vague phrasing and grammatical errors. Start with a direct answer, then give a specific reason and an example, using linking words like 'because' or 'so'.

예시: I usually wear headphones whenever I want to listen to music, because I prefer not to be alone with my thoughts. For example, I put on upbeat playlists when I'm walking home to lift my mood.

제안: Correct word choice and be specific. Replace unclear phrase ('preparing for a taste') with intended meaning (e.g., 'taking a test') and give clear conditions using linking words.

예시: I avoid headphones when I need to concentrate, such as when I'm studying or preparing for a test, because they can be distracting.

제안: Give a slightly expanded answer with one clear reason and correct tense/agreement. Use linking words like 'because' and avoid redundancy.

예시: Yes, I find them comfortable because I'm used to wearing them every day, so it feels natural and they don't bother me.

× Yes, I'm always wearing headphone umm on the sky train when I'm going to school and on my way back to especially when I'm alone I I am very into listening to music.

✓ Yes, I always wear headphones on the SkyTrain when I'm going to school and on my way back, especially when I'm alone; I am very into listening to music.

The student used 'headphone' (singular) but means the general item 'headphones' (plural). Also 'always wearing' is awkward for habitual action; use simple present 'always wear'. Capitalize proper noun 'SkyTrain'. Combine clauses and fix repetition for clarity. Suggestion: use simple present for habits and plural 'headphones' for the device.

× I use a wired headphone when I'm I'm traveling to school because I I feel like it is more convenient to use and I don't lose it as often as I lose my like Bluetooth.

✓ I use wired headphones when I'm traveling to school because I feel they are more convenient, and I don't lose them as often as my Bluetooth ones.

Again 'a wired headphone' should be plural 'wired headphones' for the device. Pronouns must match plural noun: use 'them' and 'ones' not 'it'. Also remove duplicated words and use 'they/ones' for clarity. Suggestion: match noun number with pronouns and avoid repetition.

× I usually use it when I need some type of music.

✓ I usually use them when I need some music.

The pronoun 'it' does not agree with plural 'headphones'; use 'them'. Also 'some type of music' is wordy; 'some music' is clearer here. Suggestion: ensure pronoun agrees in number with the antecedent and simplify phrases.

× So I am the one who don't like being trapped in my own thoughts.

✓ So I am the one who doesn't like being trapped in my own thoughts.

The relative clause 'who' refers to singular 'I/the one', so the verb must be 'doesn't' not 'don't'. Use correct subject-verb agreement in the relative clause. Suggestion: use 'doesn't' after 'who' when referring to a singular subject.

× So I like using music to escape from my own ideas and my own thoughts about my life sometimes.

✓ So I like using music to escape my own ideas and thoughts about my life sometimes.

The preposition 'from' is unnecessary after 'escape' when followed by a noun phrase; 'escape my ideas' is acceptable and more concise. Also remove repeated 'my own'. Suggestion: omit redundant prepositions and repeated possessives.

× I don't use headphones when I don't need any type of music, so usually when I'm preparing for a taste or when I really need to focus on what I'm doing.

✓ I don't use headphones when I don't need music, for example when I'm preparing for a test or when I really need to focus on what I'm doing.

'Any type of music' is wordy; 'music' suffices. 'Preparing for a taste' is a misused word; the correct noun is 'test'. Use 'for example' or rephrase to connect the clause. Suggestion: choose correct prepositions and vocabulary and simplify where possible.

× Yes, because I am used to it so it just become natural for me to wear headphones.

✓ Yes, because I am used to them, so it just becomes natural for me to wear headphones.

Pronoun agreement: 'it' should be 'them' for 'headphones'. Also present tense subject-verb agreement: 'become' should be 'becomes' with singular subject 'it' (or 'this') and the clause structure needs a comma. Suggestion: match pronouns to noun number and ensure correct verb form for present tense.