Music— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Your answer is clear and direct, which is good. To improve, add one brief reason and a linking phrase to make it more natural and informative. Keep it within 2–3 sentences and avoid repetition.

예시: I prefer happy music because upbeat tunes lift my mood and help me stay positive. For example, when I listen to lively pop songs I feel more energetic and ready to start the day.

제안: Your answer communicates the idea but has some informal language and minor grammar issues. Improve by using a clear topic sentence, correct pronouns and contractions, and one supporting detail with a linking word (e.g., 'because' or 'so').

예시: Yes, happy, groovy music definitely makes me feel more excited because it makes me want to dance and move. As a result, I often play upbeat tracks when I need a burst of energy.

제안: Your answer answers the question but is repetitive and slightly awkward. Improve by giving a concise direct response, then briefly explain why and include a future intention using a linking word (e.g., 'however' or 'so').

예시: I haven't taken any music classes since I was a child because there aren't many lessons available where I live. However, I would like to take classes in the future if suitable courses become available nearby.

제안: Good content but slightly repetitive and wordy. Make your response more concise: start with a clear topic sentence, then add one specific effect of music using a linking word. Avoid vague phrases like 'more into my feelings.'

예시: Yes, I usually listen to music while working or running errands because it helps me stay focused and upbeat. For instance, playing mellow instrumentals while I work makes tedious tasks feel easier and more enjoyable.

× Yes, I think happy groovy music helps me feel more excited as they can make me feel like I wanna dance and groove to the music.

✓ Yes, I think happy groovy music helps me feel more excited as it can make me feel like I want to dance and groove to the music.

The subject 'happy groovy music' is singular, so the pronoun referring to it should be 'it' not 'they' (third person singular agreement). Also 'wanna' is informal; use 'want to' for correct standard grammar. Suggestion: Replace 'they' with 'it' and 'wanna' with 'want to' to match singular subject and standard registers.

× Due to the availability of music lessons in my area, I haven't taken any music classes since I was a kid, but I would like to take classes as long as it's available in my area.

✓ Due to the lack of availability of music lessons in my area, I haven't taken any music classes since I was a kid, but I would like to take classes if they become available in my area.

The original sentence conflicts semantically: 'Due to the availability' contradicts not taking classes. Also 'it's available' incorrectly uses singular 'it' to refer to 'classes' or 'lessons'. Use 'lack of availability' to reflect reason, and 'if they become available' to refer back to plural 'classes/lessons'. Suggestion: Use clear causal phrase 'lack of availability' and plural pronoun 'they' for 'classes' or rephrase to mention 'lessons' singular.

× Yes, I prefer listening to music while doing my work and doing errands.

✓ Yes, I prefer listening to music while doing my work and running errands.

Using parallel gerunds is fine, but 'doing errands' is less natural than the collocation 'running errands.' Suggestion: Use common expressions: 'running errands' instead of 'doing errands.'

× If I am listening to music while doing my work, it makes me feel more productive and more into my feelings and it makes me do my job easily and upbeat.

✓ When I listen to music while working, it makes me feel more productive and more in touch with my feelings, and it helps me do my job easily and feel upbeat.

The original is wordy and contains awkward phrases: 'more into my feelings' and 'do my job easily and upbeat' are ungrammatical. Use 'when' for habitual actions, 'listen' for simple present, 'in touch with my feelings' is idiomatic, and 'helps me do my job easily and feel upbeat' corrects verb and adjective use. Suggestion: Simplify structure, use idiomatic expressions, maintain parallelism and correct verb forms.