Music— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be clearer and more concise. Start with a direct topic sentence (“I prefer happy music.”), then give one or two specific reasons with concrete detail. Avoid repetition and incorrect collocations (e.g. “mood more reliable to the song”). Use linking words like “because” or “so” to connect ideas. Limit your answer to 2–4 sentences.

예시: I prefer happy music because it lifts my spirits and helps me stay positive. For example, upbeat songs with a fast tempo make me feel motivated to start my day, so I often play them in the morning to boost my energy.

제안: Give a concise direct answer and follow with a specific reason or brief example. Correct grammar (use singular “music” as uncountable) and keep verb tenses consistent. Use a linking word like “because” or “so” and avoid repeating the same idea.

예시: Yes, happy music usually makes me feel more excited because the lively rhythm and bright melodies increase my energy. For instance, when I hear an upbeat pop song I immediately feel more cheerful and ready to be active.

제안: Answer the question directly and expand slightly with a reason or brief plan. The current response is vague. Use a full sentence like “No, I haven’t taken any” followed by a short explanation (reason, past experience, or future plan).

예시: No, I haven’t taken any formal music classes, because I never had the time while studying. However, I sometimes watch online tutorials to learn basic guitar chords.

제안: Start with a clear topic sentence and give one or two specific supporting details. Avoid repeating the same idea (“more energetic” and “boosts my energy”). Use linking words (“for example”, “so”) and keep it within 2–4 sentences.

예시: Yes, I usually listen to music while doing household chores because it makes the tasks feel less boring. For example, upbeat playlists help me clean faster and put me in a better mood, so I enjoy doing my chores more.

× I prefer happy music because it makes my mood more reliable to the song and can be good to my mood and I can imagine myself being happy to that song.

✓ I prefer happy music because it improves my mood and I can imagine myself feeling happy because of the song.

The sentence uses incorrect prepositions ('reliable to', 'good to', 'happy to') and awkward constructions. Replace 'makes my mood more reliable to the song' with 'improves my mood' for clarity. Use 'because of the song' or 'because of it' to show cause. Remove redundant phrases. Suggestion: simplify cause-and-effect using 'improves' and 'because of'. Grammar problem type ID: 11

× Yes, listening to happy musics makes me more excited and also boosted my energy and makes me more cheerful than the sad songs.

✓ Yes, listening to happy music makes me more excited, boosts my energy, and makes me more cheerful than sad songs.

'Musics' is incorrect; 'music' is an uncountable noun (singular). Verb forms must be parallel and consistent: use present tense verbs 'makes' and 'boosts' rather than 'boosted'. Remove the definite article before 'sad songs' unless referring to specific songs. Suggestion: use uncountable 'music' and maintain parallel verb forms. Grammar problem type ID: 1

× I have not thought about it.

✓ I have not thought about taking any music classes.

The answer is grammatically correct but incomplete or unclear in context. The examiner asked 'Have you taken any music classes?' A clearer response uses the present perfect negative plus the activity: 'I have not taken any music classes' or 'I have not thought about taking any music classes.' Suggestion: use a complete answer that directly addresses the question and includes the correct verb ('taken'). Grammar problem type ID: 26

× Usually I listen to music whenever I'm doing my chores in my house. It makes me more energetic, also boosts my energy and it feels more enjoyable to do the work whenever I'm listening to the music and doing my things.

✓ Usually I listen to music while I'm doing chores at home. It makes me more energetic, boosts my energy, and makes doing the work more enjoyable.

Use 'while' instead of 'whenever' for ongoing simultaneous actions; both work but 'while' is more natural here. 'My house' is better as 'home' or omit possessive. Remove redundant phrases 'it makes me more energetic, also boosts my energy' — combine for concision and use parallel verbs. 'Listening to the music and doing my things' is awkward; use 'doing chores' or 'doing the work.' Suggestion: simplify and use 'while', 'at home', and maintain parallel structure for verbs. Grammar problem type ID: 11