Music— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and natural: start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details. Correct minor grammar and name spelling (A. R. Rahman). Avoid repeating phrases.

예시: I usually choose music based on my mood. For example, when I feel low I listen to A. R. Rahman’s slow, melodic tracks because they comfort me, but when I’m cheerful I prefer energetic Punjabi folk songs that make me want to sing along.

제안: Improve grammar, remove repetitions and combine ideas coherently using linking words. Use singular/plural correctly and ensure subject–verb agreement. Provide one clear reason and a short example.

예시: Yes, happy music definitely makes me more excited because it has fast rhythms and upbeat instruments. For instance, Punjabi folk songs are energetic and lift my mood, so I often play them when I need a boost.

제안: Give a direct topic sentence and a concise reason. Use correct tense and word order, and avoid filler words. Mention a specific plan or timeframe if possible to enrich the answer.

예시: No, I haven’t taken formal music classes because I don’t consider myself a good singer, but I watch tutorials on YouTube to learn. I might join beginner classes next year to improve my skills.

제안: Clarify the activities and use linking words to make the answer coherent. Avoid contradictory phrases and be specific about when and why you listen to music. Use correct collocations (e.g., "while driving", "doing household chores").

예시: Yes, I often listen to music while doing household chores and when I’m driving because it makes me feel more confident and relaxed. For calm moments I choose soothing music, but during chores I prefer upbeat tracks to keep my energy up.

× Happy musics makes me feel more excited.

✓ Happy music makes me feel more excited.

The noun 'music' is an uncountable noun and should not take a plural form 'musics'. Also, the verb must agree with the singular subject, so use 'makes'. Suggestion: use 'music' (singular/uncountable) with singular verbs.

× They I I generally prefer to listen to Punjabi folk songs.

✓ I generally prefer to listen to Punjabi folk songs.

There is an extra 'They I I' which is incorrect. The subject is 'I', so the verb 'prefer' is correct. Remove the extraneous words. Suggestion: keep a single clear subject 'I' before the verb.

× They are quite energetic and they elevate your mood and makes you feel happy about yourself.

✓ They are quite energetic, and they elevate your mood and make you feel happy about yourself.

There is a subject-verb agreement error: 'they' (plural) should take the plural verb 'make', not 'makes'. Also added a comma before the coordinating conjunction for clarity. Suggestion: ensure verbs agree with plural subjects (they + make).

× I haven't taken any music classes since I don't think that I have a good voice, but I surely prefer to listen to music on YouTube and I would like to have these classes in future.

✓ I haven't taken any music classes because I don't think I have a good voice, but I do prefer to listen to music on YouTube and I would like to take these classes in the future.

Use 'because' rather than 'since' for reason clarity in speech. 'I don't think that I have' is wordy; 'I don't think I have' is preferred. 'Surely prefer' is awkward: 'do prefer' emphasizes preference. 'Have these classes in future' is incorrect wording and missing article: use 'take these classes in the future'. Suggestion: use 'because' for reasons, simplify clauses, and include 'the' before 'future'.

× Yes, I listen to music by not doing any other things that gives me a sense of confidence and also I enjoy my time while doing the daily course at home during driving.

✓ Yes, I listen to music while doing other things; it gives me a sense of confidence, and I also enjoy my time when doing daily chores at home or while driving.

The original has incorrect prepositions and confusing phrases: 'by not doing any other things' is wrong—use 'while doing other things' if you mean simultaneously. 'Gives' should be 'give' to match plural subject 'they' or generic 'it' depending; here 'it' refers to listening to music so 'it gives' is acceptable. 'Daily course' is incorrect — likely 'daily chores'. 'At home during driving' mixes locations and activities; separate 'at home' and 'while driving'. Suggestion: use 'while' for simultaneous activities, use correct nouns (chores), and separate activities with 'or'.

× They I I generally prefer to listen to Punjabi folk songs.

✓ I generally prefer to listen to Punjabi folk songs.

The phrase contains repeated and incorrect pronouns 'They I I'. The correct subject pronoun here is 'I'. Remove the extraneous pronouns. Suggestion: ensure only the intended subject pronoun appears once.