Tidiness— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and correct repetitions and unclear phrases. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific reasons using linking words (for example, because or so). Avoid filler and repeated words. Work on pronunciation of key words and grammar (use complete clauses).

예시: Yes, I like to keep things tidy because organized spaces help me relax. For example, when my books are neatly arranged on the shelf and my desk is clear, I can focus better and feel less stressed.

제안: Give a clear topic sentence and add one specific detail with a linking word to make it coherent. Correct small grammar issues (use past tense consistently) and avoid vague phrases like 'maybe'.

예시: Yes. When I was in primary school my mother reminded me to tidy my room, and from about third grade she taught me how to organize my books and toys, so I learned to clean up by myself.

제안: Use present simple and be more direct: state routine actions, then give a specific example using linking words like 'for example' or 'so'. Fix subject-verb agreement and modal usage (use 'I usually' rather than 'I may').

예시: I usually tidy my study space before I start work. For example, I put books on the shelf and clear a space on the desk so I can concentrate on my tasks.

제안: Begin with a clear opinion and give one or two concise reasons with correct vocabulary. Avoid repetition and filler words; correct collocations (say 'being tidy' or 'tidiness' and 'disturb my concentration'). Practice clear pronunciation and reduce hesitation.

예시: Yes, I think being tidy is important because a messy environment disturbs my concentration. If things are scattered, I get distracted and have to spend time organizing them before I can work.

× Yes, I like to keep things tidy 'cause when I put everything in order, such as books, books in in the sheriff's it, it looks neat and makes me feel comfortable and relaxed. Yes, it can improve my mood.

✓ Yes, I like to keep things tidy because when I put everything in order, such as my books on the shelves, it looks neat and makes me feel comfortable and relaxed. Yes, it improves my mood.

This sentence contains repeated words and incorrect phrase 'in in the sheriff's it' which appears to be a mis-saying for 'on the shelves'. The main issues are sentence structure and word choice rather than specific grammatical categories in the provided list; it should use 'because' (formal connective) and 'improves' to match present simple habitual action. Suggestion: replace the garbled phrase with 'my books on the shelves' and use 'improves' for consistent present-tense description. (ID mapping: choose the closest listed category 26: Sentence structure errors).

× When I was in primary school, my mother always told me to do that, but maybe in grade 3 she started to teach me how to organize all the things, and after that she expected me to do everything by myself.

✓ When I was in primary school, my mother always told me to do that, but in grade 3 she started to teach me how to organize everything, and after that she expected me to do everything by myself.

Original sentence is generally correct but contains the word 'maybe' which weakens a past narrative and is unnecessary; also 'all the things' is wordy. The tense sequence (past 'started' and 'expected') is correct. Improve clarity by removing 'maybe' and using 'everything'. (ID mapping: 5: Past tense issue).

× Before I started to work or learn, I may put all my books on the shelves and clear a blank space on the table for my materials 'cause these can make me feel comfortable and allows me to concentrate on what I will do.

✓ Before I start to work or study, I put all my books on the shelves and clear a space on the table for my materials because these things make me feel comfortable and allow me to concentrate on what I am going to do.

Errors: inconsistent tense and modal 'may' misplaced for habitual action; 'learn' is better as 'study'; 'clear a blank space' is unnatural; subject-verb agreement: 'these' with plural verb should be 'make' not 'makes' and later 'allows' should be 'allow'. Also tense should match habitual/current routine: use present simple ('I put... and clear...') or present continuous for immediate action. Suggest using present simple for routines and ensure plural subjects take plural verbs. (ID mapping: 27: Subject-verb agreement errors).

× Yes, preliminary tidiness to me is very important 'cause if there there are something in a mess it will make, it will disturb my cons concentration in everything and and I have to put them or put them in order instantly.

✓ Yes, being tidy is very important to me because if things are in a mess, it disturbs my concentration and I have to put them in order immediately.

Multiple issues: awkward phrase 'preliminary tidiness', duplicate words 'there there' and 'and and', incorrect word order 'are something', wrong noun form 'cons concentration', and redundant phrases. Correct structure uses 'being tidy' or 'tidiness', 'things are in a mess', singular verb 'disturbs' to match subject, and 'immediately' rather than 'instantly' (both OK but 'immediately' is more natural here). Suggest simplifying and removing duplicates. (ID mapping: 26: Sentence structure errors).