Tidiness— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: 回答总体表达了观点并给出理由，但存在重复、句子不连贯和语法错误。建议：1) 开头先用一句简洁的主题句直接回答问题；2) 用一到两句具体描述你每天做的整理动作，避免重复同义短语；3) 使用连接词（for example / because / so）使句子更连贯；4) 注意简短完整的句子（最多5句）。示例练习：每天早晨用两三句话描述动作并说明原因。

예시: Yes, I like to keep things tidy because it makes me feel comfortable and focused. For example, every morning I put my books and phone in their places and wipe my desk briefly. This simple routine helps me start the day calmly and ready to study.

제안: 回答有相关内容，但句子结构混乱、词汇使用不准确（e.g. "our my room", "desk service surface"），且逻辑表达不够清晰。建议：1) 用一两句说明过去的习惯并举例具体家务；2) 用正确短语（sweep the floor, clean the windows, tidy my desk）；3) 用连接词（and / so）说明该习惯的延续性；4) 控制在3-4句内。

예시: Yes, I did. My mother and grandmother taught me to keep my room tidy when I was little. I used to sweep the floor, clean the windows and tidy my desk every day. Because of that, I still have the habit of organizing my things now.

제안: 回答有列出步骤，但重复赘词多，表达不流畅，细节不够自然。建议：1) 使用清晰的步骤句式（First…, Then…, Finally…）；2) 避免口头填充词（like, you know）；3) 用更地道的短语（put pencils in a pencil case, place my cup on the coaster）；4) 可补充说明频率或效果以丰富内容。

예시: I keep my study space tidy with a simple routine. First I wipe down the desk, then I put my pens and pencils in a pencil case, and finally I place my books on a shelf and put my cup on a coaster. I do this every evening so my desk is ready for the next day.

제안: 观点明确并给出理由，但论证有些泛泛且重复。建议：1) 开始用一句清晰的主题句；2) 用具体例子或结果支持观点（e.g. improve concentration, reduce stress）；3) 使用连接词（for example / therefore）使逻辑更紧密；4) 避免重复类似表述。

예시: Yes, I believe being tidy is important because it reduces stress and helps you concentrate. For example, when my room is organized I can find things quickly and study more efficiently. Therefore, keeping my space tidy makes me feel calmer and more productive.

× Yes, I do like to keep everything tidy because it makes me feel very comfortable and fresh.

✓ Yes, I do like to keep everything tidy because it makes me feel very comfortable and refreshed.

此句主要时态无误，但形容词搭配有问题。用“fresh”形容人的感觉不如“refreshed”自然；“refreshed”是表示感觉恢复精力，更贴合上下文。建议使用与主语感觉相匹配的形容词，如“comfortable and refreshed”。（时态/用词改进）

× Every morning when I go to school, when I sit on my seat, sit down on my seat, I will put everything right under my control and I will put everything in the right position.

✓ Every morning when I go to school and sit down in my seat, I put everything under my control and put everything in the right position.

原句重复且结构冗长，时态应与习惯性动作保持一致用一般现在时而不是将来时“will”。“sit on my seat”应为“sit in my seat”或“sit in my chair”。建议简化重复成分，使用一般现在时描述习惯性动作。（句子结构错误）

× I enjoy the feeling of I am.

✓ I enjoy the feeling I get.

原句语序与结构不正确“the feeling of I am”不是标准表达。可以用“the feeling I get”或“the feeling of being comfortable”。建议改为“the feeling I get”或“the feeling of being comfortable”。（句子结构错误）

× Yes, my grandma and my mom told me to keep our my room tidy since I was a little girl and then also told me a lot of things such as sweeping the floor, cleaning the window and cleaning my desk service surface.

✓ Yes, my grandma and my mom told me to keep my room tidy since I was a little girl and also taught me many things such as sweeping the floor, cleaning the windows and cleaning my desk surface.

原句中“our my room”混用人称代词错误，应仅用“my room”。动词“told me a lot of things”更自然的表达是“taught me many things”。“cleaning the window”应复数“windows”，“desk service surface”不是自然搭配，应为“desk surface”。建议注意代词一致性和常用搭配。 （代词错误/用词搭配）

× It was very useful until now.

✓ It has been very useful until now.

“until now”表示从过去持续到现在，应使用现在完成时“has been”，而不是一般过去时“was”。建议用现在完成时表示持续到现在的影响。 （时态问题）

× I still have the habit to keep up everything of my time.

✓ I still have the habit of keeping everything in order.

原句表达不自然且时态/结构混乱。“have the habit of + -ing”是常用结构，因此将不定式改为动名词短语“keeping everything in order”。“of my time”不必要且不清楚，去掉以简化表达。 （时态/结构问题）

× Well, about it, I will do several things about it about it and I have a fixed routine about it such as first I will clean my desk surface and then I will put all my pencils in the in my pencil bags and finally I will put my cup.

✓ Well, I do several things and have a fixed routine: first I clean my desk surface, then I put all my pencils in my pencil case, and finally I put my cup in the right position.

原句重复“about it”多次且使用将来时“will”描述习惯动作不合适，应用一般现在时。短语“pencil bags”通常用“pencil case”，并去掉多余的“in the”。建议去除重复，使用一般现在时并用常用名词搭配。 （句子结构/用词）

× So on the right position, just something like that, you know, certainly I used to.

✓ So I put it in the right position. Something like that, you know. I certainly do.

“on the right position”应为“in the right position”。短语“used to”表示过去习惯，而这里是描述现在仍然做的动作，应改为“do”。建议使用正确介词并区分“used to”和一般现在时。 （介词错误/时态）

× You can think about it when you are so exhausted and tired at work or in class.

✓ You can think about it when you feel exhausted and tired at work or in class.

原句虽然大体可理解，但“are so exhausted and tired”较口语且冗余；将“are”改为“feel”更符合描述感受的动词用法。建议使用“feel”来表达个人感受，避免冗余的程度副词“so”。 （代词/用词建议）

× When your family come home and see a messy and dirty room, how do you think they feel about it?

✓ When your family comes home and sees a messy, dirty room, how do you think they feel about it?

主语“your family”被视为单数集合名词，动词应为第三人称单数“comes/sees”。此外“messy and dirty room”可简化为“a messy, dirty room”。建议注意主谓一致和并列形容词的标点使用。 （主谓一致/代词）

× You will feel more exhausted and angry.

✓ You will feel more exhausted and angrier.

比较级结构中“more exhausted and angry”两项并列时，第二个形容词应使用比较级“angrier”以一致表达比较。或者把两者都用“more”。建议在并列比较时保持形式一致。 （时态/比较级）

× So keeping tidy can make us feel comfortable and fresh.

✓ So keeping tidy can make us feel comfortable and refreshed.

同前，形容词“fresh”用来形容物品更常见，形容人的感受应使用“refreshed”。建议用“refreshed”来表达精神焕发的感觉。 （用词/时态）