Tidiness— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: 前置として主張（トピック文）を明確にし、その後に具体例と頻度を組み合わせて簡潔に述べると良いです。現在の回答は伝えたい内容はあるものの、最後の文が不完全で文法ミス（“And try to keep organized so.”）があります。以下を改善点として意識してください：1) 先に明確な主張（Yes, I do.）を置く。2) その理由を一文で述べる（理由＋結果）。3) 具体的な習慣や頻度を一つの文で示す。4) 文は最大5文以内で完結にし、文法と語順を確認する。

예시: Yes, I do. I feel more relaxed and can concentrate better when my space is tidy, because clutter distracts me. For example, I usually clean my room once a week and put things back in their places every evening.

제안: まずは直接質問に答える短いトピック文（Yes/No + short explanation）を作り、その後に理由と具体例を簡潔に付け加えてください。現在の回答は繰り返しや文法の乱れ（“I like the I like”, “enjoyed when I enjoyed very much I couldn't. Organize to them.”）があり、意味が取りづらいです。改善のポイント：1) 過去習慣を示す“used to”または“didn't use to”を正しく使う。2) 理由を簡潔に述べる（who, what, when）。3) 1〜2の具体例を加える。

예시: Not really. I didn't use to keep my room tidy as a child because I spent most of my time playing with my brother and our toys. As a result, toys were often left on the floor after playtime.

제안: 主語と動詞の一致や単語の重複を直し、論理的に手順や方法を順序立てて述べてください。現在は文法ミス（“try to puts”, “need to need”）や語順の問題があり、具体性も不足しています。改善点：1) 現在形で習慣を表す簡潔な主文を使う。2) 使う物や片付けのルール（例：引き出しを使う、毎日片付ける）など具体的な方法を1〜2つ挙げる。3) 接続語（for example, usually, so）で流れを整える。

예시: I try to keep only essential items on my desk to avoid clutter. For example, I keep my laptop, a notebook and a pencil case on the surface, and store other supplies in a drawer so the workspace stays clear.

제안: まず結論のトピック文で立場を示し、その後に理由と状況別の例を簡潔に述べてください。現在は文が断片化しており（“do not have to. Focus on something.”）論理の流れが途切れています。改善点：1) 一文で立場を示す。2) 接続詞（because, however, for example）で理由と対比を明確にする。3) 具体的な場面（試験勉強、創作活動など）を提示して説得力を高める。

예시: I think it depends on the situation. For focused tasks like studying or working, being tidy helps concentration, but for creative activities I sometimes prefer a bit of mess because it can inspire ideas.

× Yes I do, I feel more relaxed if my space is tidy because it helps me clear my mind and concentrate better.

✓ Yes, I do. I feel more relaxed if my space is tidy because it helps me clear my mind and concentrate better.

The sentence needed minor punctuation fixes rather than tense changes; splitting into two sentences clarifies meaning and maintains present simple tense for habitual states. Suggestion: use a comma after 'Yes' and a period to separate independent clauses.

× I usually clean my room once a week. And try to keep organized so.

✓ I usually clean my room once a week and try to keep it organized.

The original contained a sentence fragment beginning with 'And' and omitted the object 'it'. Combine into one sentence using 'and' and include 'it' after 'organized' to complete the thought. Maintain present simple for habitual action.

× Sometimes I didn't keep my room tidy because I like the I like playing the toys with my brother, so I enjoyed when I enjoyed very much I couldn't. Organize to them.

✓ Sometimes I didn't keep my room tidy because I liked playing with my brother's toys, so I couldn't organize them.

Errors: inconsistent tense (mix of past and present), repetition, and incorrect word order. Use past tense 'liked' to match 'didn't keep' and 'couldn't'. Remove repeated phrases and place object 'them' after 'organize'. Suggestion: simplify the clause to 'liked playing with my brother's toys' and finish with 'so I couldn't organize them.'

× Well, I try to puts the necessary things on my desk.

✓ Well, I try to put the necessary things on my desk.

'Try' is followed by the base verb 'put', not 'puts'. 'Puts' is third person singular present; after 'try to' use the infinitive without -s. Suggestion: use 'put'.

× For example, when I need to need some pencils and computers and notebook, I try to put.

✓ For example, when I need pencils, a computer, and a notebook, I try to put them on my desk.

Problems: duplicated 'need to need', incorrect plurals and articles, missing object and placement. Use singular 'a computer' and 'a notebook' (or plural consistently), remove duplication, and include 'them' and location 'on my desk' to complete the sentence.

× I think it depends on the situation.

✓ I think it depends on the situation.

This sentence is correct grammatically; no change needed. Keep present simple to express general opinion.

× If people have to focus on the study or work, it is necessary to be tidy.

✓ If people have to focus on studying or working, it is necessary to be tidy.

Use gerunds 'studying' and 'working' after 'focus on' rather than nouns 'the study or work'. This maintains correct verb patterns. Alternatively, 'focus on study or work' is possible but less natural.

× However, if people do not have to. Focus on something.

✓ However, if people do not have to focus on something, they do not need to be tidy.

Original had a sentence fragment 'Focus on something.' Combine into one sentence and complete the idea: state consequence. Use 'do not have to focus' and provide the main clause 'they do not need to be tidy' to finish the thought.