Tidiness— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more natural and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repeating the same idea ("inculcated" and "taught" convey the same point) and correct word choice (use "moral" not "morale").

예시: Yes, I do. I try to keep my room and desk tidy most of the time because my parents taught me to put things back in their place when I was young. For example, I always fold my clothes and tidy my desk at the end of the day, which helps me find things quickly and stay focused.

제안: Give a direct, concise answer and one specific example from childhood. Use correct grammar ("children" not "every children") and avoid repeating phrases. Use linking words (for example, because) to make your answer coherent and include one clear result or reason.

예시: Yes, I did. For example, my parents made me put away my toys every evening and label my school supplies, which taught me responsibility. As a result, I learned to be organized at school and at home.

× I have been inculcated to this value from childhood.

✓ I was taught this value from childhood.

'Inculcated to' is not the correct collocation in this context. Use 'taught' or 'instilled in' with the object: 'instilled in me' or simpler 'taught me'. Also use past simple 'was taught' for a past habit starting in childhood rather than present perfect continuous 'have been inculcated', which is awkward here.

× My parents always taught me to keep my stuff and all the area around me tidy as it's a good morale value.

✓ My parents always taught me to keep my things and the area around me tidy because it's a good moral value.

Use 'things' instead of informal 'stuff'. Use 'the area around me' rather than 'all the area around me'. 'Morale' refers to confidence or spirit; the correct adjective is 'moral'. Replace 'as' with 'because' for clearer cause. Maintain past tense 'taught'.

× I think that's a great morale value inculcated by my parents.

✓ I think that's a great moral value instilled by my parents.

Use 'moral' not 'morale' and use the collocation 'instilled by my parents' or 'instilled in me by my parents'. 'Inculcated' is less common; 'instilled' is more natural here. Keep tense consistent.

× And every children should learn to organize their things from a childhood so that they become more responsible as they grow up.

✓ And every child should learn to organize their things from childhood so that they become more responsible as they grow up.

'Every' must be followed by a singular noun: 'every child', not 'every children'. Omit the article 'a' before 'childhood'—use 'from childhood'. The rest of the sentence is acceptable; using 'their' as a singular gender-neutral pronoun is fine.