Tidiness— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise, use a clear topic sentence, correct grammar, and add one specific detail with a linking word. For example, begin with a direct statement, then give a reason and a brief specific example. Avoid repetition and filler words.

예시: Yes, I like to keep things tidy because it helps me concentrate. For example, when my room is organized I can quickly find clothes and save time getting ready, so I feel less stressed.

제안: Answer directly, improve grammar (use 'used to'), reduce hesitation, and add a brief specific supporting detail with a linking word. Provide a short contrast or example to make the response more natural and coherent.

예시: No, I didn’t use to keep my room tidy when I was a child because I preferred playing games. For instance, toys and clothes were often left on the floor, so my parents reminded me to tidy up.

× Yes, of course, because to keep things tidy helps me to focus and I want, if I want wear something else.

✓ Yes, of course, because keeping things tidy helps me to focus, and if I want to wear something else, I know where my clothes are.

The phrase 'to keep things tidy helps' is unnatural here; English often uses the gerund (verb + -ing) after prepositions and as a subject (keeping). Also 'if I want wear' is missing the infinitive marker 'to' before 'wear'. Rewriting with the gerund and adding 'to' after 'want' fixes the structure and flows naturally. Suggestion: use gerunds as subjects (keeping) and include 'to' after verbs like 'want' before another verb.

× I just know where my clothes are. So that's the reason.

✓ I just know where my clothes are, so that's why.

The two short sentences are grammatically correct but sound fragmented. Combining them with a comma and using 'that's why' is more natural in spoken English. Suggestion: join related short sentences to improve cohesion.

× No, when I was a child, I uh, didn't keep my room tidy because I just wanted to play any games, not uh, being focused in uh, home tasks, home things to I don't.

✓ No. When I was a child, I didn't keep my room tidy because I just wanted to play games and wasn't focused on household tasks.

Multiple issues: 'didn't keep' is correct past tense but 'being focused in home tasks' is incorrect; use simple past 'wasn't focused on' and 'household tasks' is a natural noun phrase. 'Any games' is unnatural; 'play games' is correct. Removed filler and reworded to fit past-tense narrative. Suggestion: keep verbs consistent in past tense, use 'wasn't focused on' rather than 'being focused in', and use natural collocations like 'play games' and 'household tasks'.

× I'm also untidy.

✓ I'm also untidy now.

Context requires contrast between past and present; adding 'now' clarifies meaning. The original sentence is grammatically correct but ambiguous. Suggestion: add time marker ('now') when contrasting past and present to avoid confusion.