Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be direct and concise: use past tense for childhood, avoid filler words (uh, maybe), and include one or two specific details. Keep to 2–3 sentences max and use linking words if adding details.

예시: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. I often went with my kindergarten classmates to play on the swings and have picnics, which was my favourite part because we could run around freely.

제안: Use correct grammar (I don't usually go), avoid repetition, and give a clear reason plus a brief contrasting comment. Mention one specific alternative activity and a linking phrase such as "because" or "however".

예시: Not really — I don't usually go to parks now because I prefer watching short videos online to relax. However, I might visit a park in cooler weather for fresh air and exercise.

제안: Answer directly then support with a clear reason. Use correct verb agreement (‘cities have developed’) and avoid vague phrasing. Give one specific benefit of having more parks and use a linking word like "because" or "so".

예시: Yes, I would — our city has grown quickly and many green spaces have been lost, so new parks would improve air quality and provide places for families to relax.

제안: Be specific and natural: state the type of park clearly, give reasons and one example of the technology you mean. Use 2–3 concise sentences and linking words like "because" or "for example."

예시: Yes — I'd like to visit a park that combines lots of greenery with modern technology, because it would offer both relaxation and convenience. For example, a park with smart benches that charge phones and interactive maps would be ideal.

× Of course, I do like going to parks as I am a child because I think when I am young, uh, maybe, uh, I'm in the kindergarten, I usually like to, uh, play in the park with my friends, like camping or something, yes.

✓ Of course, I liked going to parks when I was a child because when I was young, maybe in kindergarten, I usually liked to play in the park with my friends, doing things like picnics or camping.

The original mixes present and past tenses incorrectly (using present 'do like' and 'am a child' while speaking about childhood). Use past tense consistently when referring to past events ('liked', 'was'). Also 'in the kindergarten' is awkward; use 'in kindergarten'. 'Camping' is fine but 'picnics or camping' is clearer. Remove filler words to improve fluency.

× Actually, I don't usually going to parks now because I I think I have a better way to make me less stressful, like a scrolling through the short videos on the Internet instead of, uh, going out for pugs.

✓ Actually, I don't usually go to parks now because I think I have a better way to reduce my stress, like scrolling through short videos on the Internet instead of going out to parks.

After 'do not' use the base verb, so 'don't usually go' not 'don't usually going' (error type: verb + -ing). 'Make me less stressful' is incorrect; use 'reduce my stress'. 'A scrolling' is wrong; use 'scrolling'. 'Pugs' is a typo for 'parks'. Also change 'going out for parks' to 'going out to parks' (preposition correction).

× In recent years you know cities has been developed so rapidly and buildings are developed everywhere and I do love to and glad to see more parks in my city.

✓ In recent years, as you know, cities have developed so rapidly and buildings have been built everywhere, and I would be glad to see more parks in my city.

Use plural subject with plural verb: 'cities have developed' rather than 'cities has been developed' (subject-verb agreement). 'Buildings are developed everywhere' is awkward; use 'buildings have been built'. 'I do love to and glad to see' is ungrammatical; use 'I would be glad to see' or 'I would love to see'. Also add commas for clarity.

× That means it is more environmental friendly.

✓ That means it is more environmentally friendly.

Use the adverb 'environmentally' to modify the adjective 'friendly'. 'Environmental friendly' is incorrect word order and form; the correct phrase is 'environmentally friendly'.

× There may be a one type of park I'd like to go for it in the future.

✓ There may be a type of park I'd like to visit in the future.

Use 'a type of park' not 'a one type'. 'Go for it' is unnecessary and incorrect here; use 'visit'. Also omit the redundant pronoun 'it'. Overall simplify to 'a type of park I'd like to visit'.

× That is a park with many green trees and connect with modern technology.

✓ It would be a park with many green trees that is connected to modern technology.

The original mixes forms and lacks correct connection between clauses. Use a relative clause: 'that is connected to' or 'connected with' to indicate linkage. 'Connect' should be past participle 'connected' to describe the park. Also 'many green trees' is fine; changing 'That is' to 'It would be' fits the conditional 'There may be' context.