Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more grammatically accurate and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence (e.g., "Yes, I enjoyed going to parks as a child."), then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repetition and incorrect pronoun use.

예시: Yes, I enjoyed going to parks as a child. For example, there was a large park near my house in Dejan, and my friends and I would go there every weekend to play football and have picnics.

제안: Give a direct answer then support it with a concise reason and a specific detail. Use linking words (e.g., "because", "so") correctly and avoid contradictory phrasing. Correct tense and article use will improve clarity.

예시: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks because the one near my house is pleasant and convenient. For instance, it was renovated recently, and now I often walk there with my family in the evenings.

제안: Answer directly and give a clear reason with specific examples or consequences. Avoid fragmented sentences and fill in missing ideas. Use linking words like "because" and "for example" to structure your response.

예시: Yes, I would like more parks in my city because the lakeside park near my house attracts many people and improves local life. For example, additional small parks in other neighborhoods would give families and elderly residents easy places to exercise and relax.

제안: Provide a clear topic sentence naming the park, then add specific reasons or activities you want to do there. Use correct collocations (e.g., "go jogging", "many people go there") and avoid filler words like "ah."

예시: Yes, I would like to visit Central Park in the USA in the future because it is famous for its beautiful paths and open spaces. I hope to go jogging there and see the lakes and landmarks that many visitors enjoy.

× Yeah, when I was a child, I like to go to parks because I live in Dejan, there is a really good park near my house.

✓ Yeah, when I was a child, I liked to go to parks because I lived in Dejan; there was a really good park near my house.

The sentence mixes past and present tense. The speaker begins 'when I was a child' which requires past tense verbs. Change 'like' to 'liked' and 'live' to 'lived' to keep consistent past reference. Use a semicolon or conjunction to join related clauses correctly.

× So me, my friends usually bring me to get, I bring me bring there.

✓ So my friends and I usually went there together.

This fragment has incorrect word order, incorrect pronoun use and extraneous words. 'Me, my friends' should be 'my friends and I' as the subject. 'bring me to get, I bring me bring there' is ungrammatical; use 'usually went there together' to express habitual past action. Keep subject-verb agreement and correct subject order.

× So we usually enjoy the time together.

✓ So we usually enjoyed our time together.

Because the context is past ('when I was a child'), use past tense 'enjoyed'. Also 'the time together' is more naturally 'our time together.' Maintain tense consistency and natural possessive phrasing.

× Yeah, of course, I still like going to parks now as well because I mentioned before near my house there is a really nice park, but it changed but there is a still there.

✓ Yeah, of course, I still like going to parks now because, as I mentioned before, there is a really nice park near my house; it has changed but it is still there.

The sentence misorders clauses and mixes tenses. Keep present tense for current preference 'still like.' Use 'as I mentioned before' as a parenthetical. 'It changed' should be present perfect 'it has changed' to indicate a change that affects the present, and 'there is a still there' should be 'it is still there.' Use punctuation to clarify clauses.

× So I usually like to go there with my family.

✓ So I usually like to go there with my family.

This sentence is grammatically acceptable. It correctly uses present tense to describe a current habit. No change needed.

× I'd like to see more parks in my city because I mentioned before near my house there is a lakeside park.

✓ I'd like to see more parks in my city because, as I mentioned before, there is a lakeside park near my house.

Minor word order and punctuation improvement. 'As I mentioned before' is a clearer parenthetical; place 'near my house' after 'lakeside park' for natural word order. The tense and modal 'I'd like' are correct for expressing desire.

× There was a really good for the near like neighborhood so many people really enjoyed it and there is only 1 lakeside park in my city so if they have.

✓ It was a really good park for the nearby neighborhood, so many people enjoyed it, and there is only one lakeside park in my city, so I would like more.

This sentence has word order errors, unnecessary filler words, and an incomplete ending. 'There was a really good for the near like neighborhood' should be 'It was a really good park for the nearby neighborhood.' Replace 'so many people really enjoyed it' (simplify to 'many people enjoyed it'). 'There is only 1' should use the word 'one.' The final clause 'so if they have' is incomplete; clarify the intended meaning, e.g., 'so I would like more.' Ensure full clauses and proper quantifier spelling.

× In the future ah I would really want to go to the Central Park in USA because I heard the park is really nice and the many people when going there to jogging or kind of exercise so I really want to try it.

✓ In the future, I would really like to go to Central Park in the USA because I've heard the park is really nice and many people go there to jog or exercise, so I would really like to try it.

Improve modal and tense consistency: 'would really want' is acceptable but 'would really like' is more natural. 'I heard' should be present perfect 'I've heard' to connect to present desire. 'the many people when going there to jogging or kind of exercise' is ungrammatical; use 'many people go there to jog or exercise.' Use 'Central Park in the USA' for correct name and article. Maintain consistent modal and verb forms for future intent.