Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and accurate. Start with a clear topic sentence saying whether you liked parks, then give one specific memory with correct grammar and linking words. Avoid redundancy (e.g., "mom mother"). Use past tense consistently and keep to 2–3 sentences.

예시: Yes, I did like going to parks as a child. I remember one holiday when my mother took my siblings and me to a large park where we fed ducks and played on the swings, which made the day very enjoyable.

제안: Provide a clear topic sentence and then one or two specific reasons with smoother linking words. Correct collocations ("more calm" or "calmer"), remove repeated words, and keep sentences concise (max 4–5).

예시: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks. I find them calmer now with many trees and pleasant scenery, which helps me relax and instantly lifts my mood.

제안: Answer directly then add one clear reason and a brief suggestion. Use correct articles and phrasing ("more parks", "it is not easy"). Avoid repeating phrases. Limit to 2–3 sentences and use linking words like "however".

예시: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because they improve residents' quality of life. However, urbanization makes this difficult, so local authorities should protect green spaces and plan new parks where possible.

제안: Give a direct answer (yes/no) and then a specific plan or example of a park you'd like to visit. Use correct verb forms ("I haven't thought"), avoid filler words, and keep to 2–3 sentences. Mention a type of park or activity to add concreteness.

예시: I haven't thought of a specific park yet, but I plan to visit botanical gardens or a lakeside park in the future because they provide calmness and improve my mood when I walk or read there.

× I do not remember that much when I was child but few of the moments I remember one time there was a holiday and my mom mother has taken my brother sisters, me to one part and we see many.

✓ I do not remember much from when I was a child, but I recall a few moments. Once there was a holiday and my mother took my brothers, sisters, and me to a park where we saw many things.

This sentence has multiple sentence structure errors (ID 26) and subject-verb agreement/verb tense problems (ID 27 and ID 5). It is a run-on with missing articles and incorrect verb forms: 'when I was child' needs the article 'a child'; 'few of the moments I remember' is awkward and should be 'I recall a few moments'; 'my mom mother has taken' is redundant and uses present perfect incorrectly for a past single event — use simple past 'took'; 'my brother sisters, me' needs plural markers and correct order 'my brothers, sisters, and me'; 'to one part' should be 'to a park'; 'we see many' is present tense and incomplete — change to 'we saw many things'. Suggest breaking into two sentences, add articles, correct verb tenses, and order of nouns for clarity.

× Yes I do and I think the parks nowadays are more calmer and there are lots of trees.

✓ Yes, I do, and I think parks nowadays are calmer and have lots of trees.

This contains a present tense issue (ID 6) and an adjective usage issue (ID 13). 'More calmer' is ungrammatical because 'calmer' already expresses the comparative; use 'calmer' without 'more'. Also omit the definite article if speaking generally: 'the parks nowadays' -> 'parks nowadays'. Use plural noun agreement with 'have lots of trees'. Add commas for clarity.

× The scenery is very pleasant which makes help me to feel relaxed and make make my mood really cheerful.

✓ The scenery is very pleasant, which helps me feel relaxed and really lifts my mood.

This is an incorrect use of adjectives/adverbs and verb forms (ID 13 and ID 8). 'Which makes help me to feel' is ungrammatical; use 'which helps me feel' or 'which makes me feel'. Remove the extra 'make' and 'to' before 'feel'. 'Make my mood really cheerful' is awkward; use 'lifts my mood' or 'makes me feel cheerful'. Also add a comma before the relative clause for readability.

× Yes, I obviously want to see the more parks in my city, although due to the growing population and urbanization, the situation is not easy for it.

✓ Yes, I obviously want to see more parks in my city, although, due to the growing population and urbanization, this is not easy.

This has article errors (ID 22) and sentence structure issues (ID 26). 'See the more parks' incorrectly uses the definite article 'the' with 'more parks' — drop 'the'. 'The situation is not easy for it' is awkward; replace with 'this is not easy' or 'it is not easy to achieve'. Also add commas for readability.

× But I would like to have the park more and more in the future and we should encourage it.

✓ I would like to have more parks in the future, and we should encourage their development.

Sentence structure error (ID 26) and article/word choice issues (ID 22). 'Have the park more and more' is unclear; use 'have more parks'. 'Encourage it' is vague; specify 'their development' or 'park creation'. Use a comma and conjunction for a compound sentence.

× I haven't think of that as of right now, but yeah, obviously hopefully in the future I would like to visit the park more often because it provides a sense of calmness to me, which instantly lift up my mood.

✓ I haven't thought about that as of right now, but obviously, I hope in the future I will visit parks more often because they provide me with a sense of calmness, which instantly lifts my mood.

This contains a past tense/verb form error (ID 5) and subject-verb agreement (ID 27). 'I haven't think' should be 'I haven't thought' (past participle). 'Hopefully in the future I would like to visit the park' mixes modalities and is awkward — use 'I hope in the future I will visit parks more often' or 'I would like to visit parks more often in the future'. 'It provides a sense of calmness to me' is wordy; use 'they provide me with a sense of calmness'. 'Which instantly lift up my mood' needs subject-verb agreement and better phrasing: 'which instantly lifts my mood'.

× And this environment is there is quite pleasant.

✓ And this environment is quite pleasant.

Sentence structure error (ID 26). The phrase 'is there is' is redundant and ungrammatical. Remove the extra 'is there' to produce the correct sentence 'this environment is quite pleasant'.

× You can have your own.

✓ You can have your own space.

This is a sentence structure/clarity issue (ID 26). 'You can have your own' is incomplete and vague; add a noun like 'space' or 'spot' to clarify what 'your own' refers to.