Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and add a clearer topic sentence, then give one specific example with a brief reason. Use a linking word to connect the general statement and the example. Avoid redundancy (e.g., "take pictures of the views" repeated).

예시: Yes — I enjoy photographing views, especially when I travel. For example, when I fly I often photograph the clouds and landscape because aerial shots capture unique perspectives I can’t see from the ground.

제안: Start with a direct topic sentence stating your preference, then give one or two specific supporting details. Reduce filler phrases (e.g., "mostly", "especially for example") and use a linking word to connect the reason. Mention a particular scene or landmark to be more vivid.

예시: I prefer urban views because I like the energetic atmosphere. For instance, I enjoy photographing city skylines at night, when illuminated buildings and busy streets create striking contrasts and reflections.

제안: Make a clear topic sentence and give one specific reason with a concrete example. Avoid unfinished sentences and add a closing remark. Mention a particular place or feature you want to photograph and why it appeals to you.

예시: I prefer views from other countries because they offer new landscapes and cultural sights. For example, I would love to photograph the rice terraces and street scenes in Vietnam to capture both natural patterns and everyday local life.

× Yes, I do love taking pictures of the views especially when I'm traveling.

✓ Yes, I do love taking pictures of views, especially when I'm traveling.

The phrase 'the views' is acceptable but sounds unnatural here; removing 'the' makes it more general. Also add a comma before 'especially' to improve sentence clarity. This is a stylistic correction related to noun use with gerund phrase; keep verb + -ing 'taking' as correct.

× For example, when I hop into a plane, I usually take a picture of the clouds and the surroundings and it's just a great way to look back.

✓ For example, when I hop on a plane, I usually take pictures of the clouds and the surroundings, and it's just a great way to look back.

The verb phrase should be 'hop on a plane' rather than 'hop into a plane' (preposition use). Also 'take pictures' (plural) fits better with repeated or general actions than 'take a picture.' Added a comma before 'and' to join independent clauses. This combines preposition correction (ID 11) and verb + -ing usage context; main changes are preposition and noun number.

× I prefer views in urban areas mostly because I love the hustling and bustling look of a city and especially for example when I take pictures at night, the city lights are just amazing to look at.

✓ I prefer views in urban areas mostly because I love the hustle and bustle of a city, and especially when I take pictures at night the city lights are amazing to look at.

Use the noun phrase 'the hustle and bustle' rather than adjective forms 'hustling and bustling look.' Remove redundant 'for example' after 'especially.' Also add a comma after the city phrase for clarity. This corrects adjective/adverb misuse (ID 13) and eliminates redundancy.

× I prefer views from other countries because I would love to see new things and explore different sceneries and landscapes.

✓ I prefer views in other countries because I would love to see new things and explore different scenery and landscapes.

Use 'in other countries' or 'from other countries' depending on intended meaning; 'in other countries' is more natural for preferences about views located there. Also 'scenery' is generally uncountable, so use singular 'scenery' rather than 'sceneries.' This addresses preposition use (ID 11) and noun number (ID 1).

× Although I haven't been able to travel abroad, I would love to go to for instance Vietnam to experience their local

✓ Although I haven't been able to travel abroad, I would love to go, for instance, to Vietnam to experience the local culture.

The original sentence is incomplete and misorders phrases: 'go to for instance Vietnam' is incorrect; place 'for instance' parenthetically and put 'to Vietnam' together. Also finish the thought by adding 'culture' after 'local.' This fixes sentence structure (ID 26) and word order issues.