Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid vague words like "perhaps" and correct noun forms (e.g., "pictures," "greenery").

예시: Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views. For example, when I tour the countryside on my motorcycle, I often photograph mountain woods, rivers, and wide green fields because their peaceful atmosphere helps me relax.

제안: Clarify vocabulary and avoid repetition. Give one main reason and one concrete example, using linking phrase(s) for coherence. Replace unclear words (e.g., "Cree see") and correct word forms ("energizing" -> "energised" or "energising").

예시: I prefer rural areas because I enjoy natural scenery. For example, mountain woods, rivers and green fields make me feel calm and refreshed, so I often visit countryside spots to recharge.

제안: Be more precise and grammatical. Start with a clear stance, then contrast with a brief reason and a specific example. Use correct verb agreement and avoid awkward phrasing like "Within or with Outside."

예시: I like views in both my country and abroad. For instance, in Japan I enjoy coastal and mountain landscapes that are very calming, but I also appreciate foreign scenery because it offers new perspectives and cultural experiences.

× I like taking a lot of photos of different views.

✓ I like taking many photos of different views.

The sentence uses 'a lot of' which is informal; this is a quantifier issue but within the allowed list we handle it as verb + -ing context surrounding noun quantity. Replacing 'a lot of' with 'many' is more grammatically concise here; 'taking' as a gerund is correct. Suggestion: use 'many' for countable plural nouns in more formal contexts.

× For example, my hobby is to go on touring with my motorcycle and when I go to the countryside I like to take picture of the greeneries and see.

✓ For example, my hobby is touring on my motorcycle, and when I go to the countryside I like to take pictures of the greenery and scenery.

Multiple issues centered on verb+-ing and noun forms: 'to go on touring' is awkward; use the gerund 'touring' or 'to go touring'. 'Take picture' needs plural 'pictures'. 'Greeneries' is incorrect plural; use uncountable 'greenery'. 'See' is vague; 'scenery' is the correct noun for views. Suggestion: use gerund forms correctly and correct noun plurals/uncountable nouns.

× This is because I like seeing the Cree see.

✓ This is because I like seeing the sea.

'Cree see' appears to be a mispronunciation or incorrect words. Likely intended 'sea'. Replace with the correct noun 'sea'. Also 'seeing the sea' uses the gerund 'seeing' correctly.

× I like to see the greenery and woods in the mountains and the rivers because it makes me feel calm and relaxed and energizing.

✓ I like to see the greenery, the woods in the mountains, and the rivers because they make me feel calm, relaxed, and energized.

Several problems: subject-verb agreement with 'it makes' should be plural 'they make' because multiple items (greenery, woods, rivers) are listed (related to subject-verb agreement but within gerund context). 'Energizing' is an adjective form describing something that causes energy; correct predicative adjective is 'energized' to describe the speaker's feeling. Suggestion: match plural subjects with plural verbs and use appropriate adjective 'energized'.

× Within or with Outside my country in Japan, there are lots of great views and scenes that makes you feel calm and relaxed and gives you new energy.

✓ Both inside and outside my country of Japan, there are many great views and scenes that make you feel calm, relaxed, and refreshed.

Preposition and determiners: 'Within or with Outside' is incorrect. Use 'inside and outside'. 'My country in Japan' is confusing; use 'my country of Japan' or just 'Japan'. 'Lots of' is informal; 'many' is better. 'That makes' should be plural 'that make' because it refers to plural 'views and scenes'. 'Gives you new energy' is acceptable but 'refreshed' is more natural. Suggestion: use correct prepositions and ensure verb agrees with plural subject.