Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be direct and concise: start with a clear topic sentence stating whether you like taking pictures, then give one or two specific reasons using correct grammar and linking words. Avoid repetition and long, unclear clauses. Use correct verb forms (e.g., 'I don't like' or 'I didn't used to like' depending on meaning) and countable/uncountable phrases ('I don't have much free time').

예시: I don't often take pictures of different views because I spend most of my time at home studying and working. Therefore, I rarely have free time to go out and photograph scenery, and photography is not really my hobby.

제안: Begin with a clear statement of preference (urban or rural), then give specific reasons with linking words (for example, 'because', 'so', 'however'). Use correct comparative forms ('fewer people', 'less noise') and avoid irrelevant repetition. Mention one clear example or reason connected to your life to make it personal.

예시: I prefer rural views because there are fewer people and much less noise, which makes it easier to concentrate. In addition, there are good job opportunities in the rural area where I plan to work, so living there suits both my lifestyle and career plans.

제안: State your preference clearly and give two concise, specific reasons using correct grammar and linking words. Use precise vocabulary (e.g., 'better job opportunities', 'higher standards', 'longer working hours') and avoid double negatives and confusing comparisons. Keep to two or three sentences maximum.

예시: I prefer views in other countries because they generally offer better job opportunities and higher standards of living. Also, working hours are often more reasonable abroad, so people have more time to enjoy the scenery.

× I didn't like to taking picture of different views as now I spend my more of the time in my house or house as compared to others for my career activities and my studies.

✓ I don't like taking pictures of different views because now I spend most of my time at home on my career activities and my studies.

The original mixes past 'didn't like' with present context and uses incorrect infinitive and gerund forms. Use present simple 'don't like' to match 'now'. Use 'taking pictures' (gerund + plural) and 'spend most of my time at home' for natural phrasing. Replace 'as' with 'because' for correct cause expression.

× So I have not that much free time to go outside and taking take pictures of some different views and that is not and that is not my hobby also.

✓ So I don't have much free time to go outside and take pictures of different views, and that is not my hobby either.

After 'to' use the base verb 'take' (infinitive), not 'taking'. Also use 'don't have' (present) instead of 'have not', 'much' rather than 'that much' is more natural, and 'either' is the correct negative addition. Remove duplicate words and extra articles.

× I prefer to live in these areas because in rural areas there are less people and so the noise is so less as compared to the urban areas and ruder areas have good opportunities of jobs.

✓ I prefer to live in rural areas because there are fewer people and less noise compared to urban areas, and rural areas have good job opportunities.

'Less' should be 'fewer' for countable 'people'. Use 'less noise' for uncountable 'noise'. 'Compared to' is sufficient; avoid 'so less' and 'as compared to'. Use 'rural areas' consistently (not 'ruder'), and 'job opportunities' is the correct noun phrase.

× So I prefer to live in rural areas as my career options are also in rural areas.

✓ So I prefer to live in rural areas because my career opportunities are also there.

Repetition of 'in rural areas' is stylistically awkward. Replace with 'there' to avoid redundancy. 'Because' is a clearer connector than 'as' in this context.

× I will view for any another other country because I in my country there's not a good shop, good opportunities of jobs and the setting expectations also less as compared to the other countries.

✓ I would like to visit other countries because in my country there are not good shops, few job opportunities, and lower living standards compared to other countries.

'I will view for any another other country' is incorrect collocation; use 'I would like to visit other countries' for preference. Use plural 'shops' and 'few job opportunities'. 'Setting expectations' is unclear; 'lower living standards' better expresses the intended meaning. Use present simple to state general facts.

× And in our country there isn't so less working there, there's so more working hours and hard works as compared to other country.

✓ In our country there is not so much work; there are longer working hours and harder work compared to other countries.

Use 'not so much work' for uncountable 'work', not 'isn't so less working'. Use 'longer working hours' and 'harder work' for correct comparative forms. Use plural 'other countries' for comparison. Avoid redundant 'there' and incorrect quantifiers like 'so more'.