Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Make the answer more fluent and structured: start with a clear topic sentence, avoid fillers (umm, actually), correct small errors (e.g., “specially” → “especially,” “duck” → “ducks”), and add one specific detail to support your preference. Keep it under five sentences and use a linking word for coherence.

예시: Yes, I enjoy taking photos of different views, especially along the riverside. I like riversides because they offer changing light and reflections, and you can often spot ducks and other birds. For example, last weekend I photographed a heron standing in the water at sunset, which made a very calm picture.

제안: Clarify vocabulary and grammar: replace wrong word (“abuse”) with “being” or “those,” fix grammar (“it's connects” → “it connects” or “they connect”), reduce fillers, and give one concise reason with a linking word. Use varied vocabulary such as “countryside” or “open countryside.”

예시: I prefer views in rural areas because they connect me more with nature. For instance, the countryside has open fields and quiet lanes where I can relax, whereas urban views are usually busy and noisy.

제안: Make your opinion clearer and more accurately phrased: use correct verb forms (“intrigue” → “intrigues”), avoid repetitive fillers (“like”), and connect ideas with linking words (e.g., “however,” “for example”). Provide one specific, vivid detail to support why Swiss views appeal to you.

예시: I like the scenery in my own country, but I’m especially fascinated by views in Switzerland. For example, the clear blue lakes framed by rugged mountains create a majestic scene, and even ordinary sights, such as cows grazing on alpine meadows, look picturesque and peaceful.

× I like specially the Riverside.

✓ I especially like the riverside.

The student used 'specially' incorrectly; 'especially' is the correct adverb for emphasizing preference. Also 'Riverside' should be lowercase unless it is a proper name; use 'the riverside' for the general area. Suggestion: use 'especially' for emphasis and check capitalization for place names.

× Umm, and then you can see duck and other birds also.

✓ Umm, and then you can see ducks and other birds as well.

'Duck' here should be plural ('ducks') to refer to the animals in general. Also 'also' is more natural as 'as well' at the end. Use plural for general references to countable animals.

× Specifically I'd like to watch birds.

✓ Specifically, I like watching birds.

The original 'I'd like to watch birds' is grammatical but slightly awkward with the previous sentence; 'I like watching birds' expresses a habitual preference more naturally. Adding a comma after 'Specifically' improves clarity. Use gerund 'watching' for general hobby activities.

× Actually I prefer abuse in rural areas because it's connects more to the nature.

✓ Actually, I prefer being in rural areas because they are more connected to nature.

The student used 'abuse' incorrectly; likely they meant 'being' or 'living' in rural areas. 'It's connects' is ungrammatical: 'it' with 'connects' is wrong; use 'they are more connected' referring to 'rural areas' (plural). Also 'to the nature' should be 'to nature' (no article). Suggestions: choose correct vocabulary ('being in' or 'living in'), ensure subject-verb agreement, and drop the definite article with 'nature'.

× Umm, I like urban area as well, but not as much as I do the rural areas.

✓ Umm, I like urban areas as well, but not as much as I do rural areas.

Use plural 'urban areas' to match 'rural areas'. The phrase 'as much as I do the rural areas' contains an unnecessary 'the' and awkward order; remove 'the' and keep parallel structure. Ensure parallel noun forms when comparing.

× I do like my own country, but the view in Switzerland always intrigue me.

✓ I do like my own country, but the views in Switzerland always intrigue me.

'View' should be plural ('views') if referring to scenery in general. 'Intrigue' must agree with plural subject: 'views ... intrigue me' is correct. Maintain number agreement between subject and verb; keep 'do like' for emphasis is acceptable.

× Like how fascinating the lakes are there, the mountains and everything.

✓ For example, how fascinating the lakes, the mountains, and everything there are.

The original is a fragment and colloquial. Rewriting into a clearer clause helps: either integrate into previous sentence ('...always intrigue me, for example, how fascinating the lakes, the mountains, and everything there are.') or list items with parallel structure. Ensure parallel nouns and clear sentence structure.

× Like it's looking at a simple cow doing its thing.

✓ For example, looking at a simple cow doing its thing feels really majestic.

The phrase 'it's looking at' is awkward and ungrammatical here. Better to say 'looking at ... feels' to express the experience. 'Feels really majestic' ties the feeling to the observation. Use gerund with a verb expressing perception or feeling for natural phrasing.

× It's really majestic.

✓ It is really majestic.

This sentence is acceptable but using the full form 'It is' is slightly more formal; no grammar error. Keep as 'It is really majestic.'