Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and correct small grammar mistakes; start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repetition (e.g., "the skies" and "sunset or sunrise" overlap) and correct articles and word order ("taking pictures of nature" not "the nature").

예시: Yes, I enjoy photographing different views, especially skies at sunrise and sunset. For example, I often capture the subtle colors and cloud shapes because they help me feel calm and highlight nature's beauty.

제안: Organize the answer with a clear topic sentence stating preference, then give two coherent, specific reasons using linking words. Correct unclear phrases and remove filler words (e.g., "UMM", repeated fragments).

예시: I like both urban and rural views, but if I had to choose I prefer rural scenes because they are peaceful and offer natural subjects like fields and trees. However, urban areas also interest me because the architecture and city lights create dramatic photo opportunities.

제안: Start with a direct topic sentence stating your preference, then give specific reasons and use linking words to connect ideas. Fix grammar issues ("other countries' places," "before I travel to other countries"). Avoid repeating the same idea.

예시: I prefer photographing views in my own country because I want to explore its landscapes and learn more about local culture first. That said, I believe foreign locations would offer different perspectives and I hope to photograph them in the future.

× Yes, I like taking pictures of different views, especially the skies, just like the sunset or the sunrise or anything.

✓ Yes, I like taking pictures of different views, especially the sky, such as sunsets or sunrises.

Use of plural 'skies' is acceptable but 'the sky' is more natural in this context; 'just like' is informal and repetitive; use 'such as' and plural nouns 'sunsets' and 'sunrises' to refer generally. Also remove 'or anything' which is vague. Suggestion: use specific nouns and standard connectors for clarity.

× I like taking pictures of the nature because it gives me calm and it's very beautiful.

✓ I like taking pictures of nature because it calms me and it is very beautiful.

'The nature' is incorrect; 'nature' is uncountable and does not need 'the' here. 'Gives me calm' is unnatural; use 'calms me'. Avoid contraction 'it's' in formal responses or keep consistent; 'it is' acceptable. Suggestion: use uncountable noun without article and correct verb phrase for emotions.

× Coming from a rural place, whenever I go to urban place it always amazes me because it's new to my it's new to my eyes.

✓ Coming from a rural place, whenever I go to an urban area it always amazes me because it is new to my eyes.

Missing article before 'urban place' — use 'an urban area'. Sentence contains repetition 'it's new to my it's new to my eyes'; remove duplicate and expand contraction to 'it is' if desired. Also 'area' is more natural than 'place'. Suggestion: watch for missing articles and accidental repetition.

× But I also prefer UMM taking pictures with the UMM girl because it's very peaceful.

✓ But I also prefer taking pictures with the girls from UMM because it is very peaceful.

Original phrase 'UMM taking pictures with the UMM girl' is ungrammatical and unclear. Likely intended to refer to students or girls from UMM (Universitas Muhammadiyah Malang, for example). Rephrase to 'girls from UMM' or 'people from UMM' and place 'taking pictures' correctly. Also expand 'it's' to 'it is' for clarity. Suggestion: specify the noun and correct word order for clarity.

× Since I haven't been to other countries, I would prefer taking pictures here in my own country because I would like to explore my country first before I wander to other country.

✓ Since I have not been to other countries, I would prefer taking pictures here in my own country because I would like to explore my country first before I travel to other countries.

Mismatch: 'other countries' plural used earlier then 'other country' singular later; maintain plural 'other countries'. 'Wander to' is odd for traveling internationally; use 'travel to'. Also prefer full form 'have not' in formal speech. Suggestion: keep number agreement and choose appropriate verbs for travel contexts.

× But I know other countries place will also be beautiful.

✓ But I know places in other countries will also be beautiful.

Original 'other countries place' lacks plural agreement and correct word order; use 'places in other countries'. Also add 'will' is fine; ensure noun phrase is grammatical. Suggestion: use 'places in other countries' to express the idea clearly.