Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more natural and grammatically correct: combine short sentences, correct article and verb form errors, and avoid redundancy. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one specific supporting detail using a linking word. Keep it to no more than 3–4 sentences.

예시: Yes, I love photographing different views because photography is one of my favorite hobbies. For example, I usually shoot landscapes rather than portraits since I enjoy capturing wide scenes and natural light.

제안: Good answer structure and content. To improve, make linking clearer and avoid repeating ideas (e.g., peaceful/natural and relax are similar). Add one specific example or brief comparison to strengthen the response, and keep sentences concise.

예시: I prefer rural views because they are peaceful and full of natural beauty, which helps me relax. For example, I love photographing rolling fields and distant hills, whereas I sometimes photograph city skylines at night for their striking lights.

제안: Clarify meaning and correct grammar and repetition. Start with a concise topic sentence (state preference), then give a clear reason and one specific example. Avoid vague percentages and repetitive words like “beauty.” Use linking words (because, however) for coherence.

예시: I prefer views in my own country because I have explored most regions and discovered many beautiful landscapes. For instance, while traveling around India I photographed diverse scenery such as coastal cliffs and mountain valleys, so I feel more connected to those places.

× Yes, I love to take pictures of different views. As one of my hobby is photography.

✓ Yes, I love to take pictures of different views because one of my hobbies is photography.

The original has a sentence fragment 'As one of my hobby is photography.' and singular/plural mismatch 'hobby' vs 'hobbies'. This is a sentence structure error: combine into one sentence with a conjunction and correct noun number. Suggestion: use 'because' to connect the idea and pluralize 'hobbies' when referencing one of multiple hobbies.

× I generally prefer to take more landscape picture than portrait.

✓ I generally prefer to take more landscape pictures than portraits.

The nouns 'picture' and 'portrait' should be plural when comparing quantities. This is an incorrect use of quantifiers/number. Use plural forms 'pictures' and 'portraits' after 'more' and 'than' to match the comparative structure.

× For example, I enjoy looking at fields and hills when I visit the countryside, but sometimes I also like city views at night because the light looks beautiful.

✓ For example, I enjoy looking at fields and hills when I visit the countryside, but sometimes I also like views of the city at night because the lights look beautiful.

'City views' is acceptable but 'views of the city' is more natural with 'visit the countryside' context; more importantly 'the light looks beautiful' should be plural 'the lights look beautiful' because city lights are usually multiple. This is an incorrect use of prepositions and noun number; change to 'views of the city' and pluralize 'lights'.

× I prefer views in my own country as I've traveled 90% of it.

✓ I prefer views in my own country because I've traveled 90% of it.

Using 'as' at the start can be unclear in this context; 'because' is clearer to express reason. This is an incorrect use of conjunction/pronoun choice affecting clarity. Also 'traveled 90% of it' is acceptable but ensure 'it' clearly refers to 'my country'.

× I have never travelled other countries as my parents are always busy in their work.

✓ I have never traveled to other countries because my parents are always busy with their work.

Missing preposition 'to' after 'traveled' is incorrect; 'as' is awkward for cause here—use 'because'. Also use 'busy with their work' not 'busy in their work'. This is an incorrect use of prepositions and conjunctions.

× While travelling India, I have seen so much beautiful scenery, beauty.

✓ While traveling around India, I saw so much beautiful scenery.

Using present perfect 'have seen' with 'while' and a past visit is awkward; simple past 'saw' fits better. Also 'travelling India' needs preposition or 'around India'. The word 'beauty' is redundant after 'scenery'. This is a past tense and sentence structure issue: use simple past and streamline the phrase.